Black Shadows of the Flame

Outside it was dark, which was no big difference from inside, despite the three candles burning. One candle for every person in the dull living room of the long unoccupied, desolated house. No more light. No magic. Under hiding, you have do without a lot of things that you usually deem 'Oh So Normal'. But war takes them away all too easily.

Harry and Ron sat on an offhandedly cleaned spot of the sooty floor, one candle on each side of the chess board. Hermione was over in a far corner, reading. The lines repeated themselves - in reality, of course, they did not, but Hermione found herself reading the same line about three or four times until she noticed that she did and eventually went on to the next line. If anybody had asked her what she just had read (four times), she wouldn't have been able to answer. She didn't take in a single word.

"Check," Harry announced.

Ron stared at the board. "You mean, checkmate," he said tonelessly. He laid his king down. Harry had won. He looked up at his friend. This victory was a first. He too had been absentminded; this certainly hadn't been his best game, but...

Ron took his candle and stood up. He went over to Hermione and took the book away from her.

"You're going to ruin your eyes."

He sat down next to her and she slid up behind him, placing her hands on his shoulders.

"I wasn't really reading anyway."

Ron stared at the flame of the candle in his hands. Blank. At last he put it down next to hers. He blinked to chase the blankness from his line of vision, but all he succeeded in was provoking black dots to swim in front of his eyes - black shadows of the flame. He reached for Hermione's hands, and pulled them down onto his chest, where he held them tight.

Harry put the chess pieces away, closed the board and watched his friends at the other side of the room. He caught Ron's eyes. No word. 'Come over'. He picked up his candle and joined the couple in the corner. He put the light down next to the other two; they shone much brighter together. It's always this way with candles. When you put them near each other, the flames seem to reach out, and thus seem to enlarge in order to close the distance between them. Yes, together they shone brightly.

Ron found himself staring into the flames again. His eyes hurt. He wanted them to hurt. He wanted something to fight against. He could fight the pain, fight against his aching eyes wanting to look away. Hermione had her chin resting upon his shoulder now. She was leading non-verbal conversation with Harry. Their eyes locked.

"I hate to wait." That was Ron.

Nothing to say about this. They all hated to wait.

"I should never have let Ginny go."

"We've been through this, Ron. It was her own decision. Draco said she was doing fine," Harry said.

"If they find out that she's spying for us, even Draco can't help her."

"They won't find out."

"You don't know. Maybe they won't kill her.... If they find out anything about Draco's double play though, he'll be six feet under." His eyes were watering by now, the flame irreversibly imprinted into his mind. He closed his eyes and Harry saw Hermione jerking and becoming pale - she couldn't help but pull her hands away from Ron the second he let go to rub his eyes. Her eyes widened for a moment, and Harry knew that she had felt whatever emotions Ron had experienced. And her reaction frightened him.

Concentrating on any positive feeling left in him, he gestured her over, as she slid away from her boyfriend, and when she came over to Harry, he placed her arms around her, so she could lean safely against his chest - safe physically as well as empathically.

When Ron finally stopped rubbing his eyes and was able to see more than a blackish blur, her face had assumed it's natural colour again. He had noticed nothing.

Hermione absentmindedly pulled one candle away from the others towards herself and burned a single hair.

"We still have to kill some time," she said - wrong choice of words. She pulled her eyes away from the single flame. She looked up, first at Ron, then over her shoulder at Harry. "What do you want to do later?"

"What?"

"I mean, what do you want to do afterwards? For a living?"

Ron stared at her with slight bewilderment. He was about to open his mouth to no doubt make a cynical remark, but Harry was faster.

"I'm not sure. Talitha and I planned on becoming Aurors. At least part time. Then again, I want to study."

"Muggle University?" asked Hermione.

"Yes; I'd like to become a teacher."

Hermione smiled. Dumbledore was the first role model Harry had ever had. Or at least the first one close to it. She could imagine him as a teacher rather well.

"What about Quidditch?"

"Passion. It doesn't qualify as a job though."

"You'll get offers, won't you?" It was strange talking to Harry like this, somehow talking behind. She didn't turn her head. She was watching Ron. His eyes were still bitter and she knew that he bit back maybe a thousand bitter remarks about how they might not even have a future. Good! He should keep them to himself! Speaking those thoughts out loud only made them real. This way he had to listen. This way he had to take in that they very well might have a future.

So she tried to keep the conversation lively and Harry played along well.

"I guess so. I'm not saying I'll never play again, but I don't want it to be at first place in my life."

"That's Talitha, anyway, isn't it?" She could feel Harry smile and ache at the same time.

Ron toyed with the candles. Unconsciously, he pushed the two in front of him towards the one in front of Hermione. She again burned a hair.

"So you'll become a teacher. That's something I thought about as well. A teacher, an Auror, a part time Quidditch celebrity - sounds pretty good, if you ask me." The hair sizzled away. She looked up again. "And you, Ron?"

Ron looked up. He attempted to open his mouth to say - only to be intercepted by a warning glance shot by Harry. He closed his mouth again and averted his eyes for a moment. Silence. Ron swallowed audibly.

"I... I want to become a Mediwizard. Maybe study at different places. There's so many ways to approach the field, and I suppose that if I could manage to get to know at least some of them, I could figure out some innovations that might be long sought solutions to ancient problems." Hermione saw him ease up a bit. The candles shone brightly in front of them. She burned a hair. Sizzle. "And I want a family." Here he looked up and directly at Hermione. She blushed slightly. "I want children. And maybe I would like to adopt one."

"Adopt one?"

"Yes." Now he looked straight at Harry. Something cruel in the directness of his look. "There will be quite a few orphans afterwards." Harry sighed.

"Well, Harry, there's no use in pretending that everything will be over, even if we survive the war," he said almost matter-of-factly, if not for the slight bitterness accompanying his voice. "And there is no point in making believe that there is no war. There will be consequences, we -"

"I know!" Harry blurted out, "Don't you think I know?" He hadn't intended on getting angry, but... he felt Hermione tense in his arms and forced himself to calm down. "Don't tell me anything about consequences, Ronald Weasley, okay? I not only know about those consequences, I practically lived them."

Silence. The two boys, who had been best friends for over six years now looked each other in the eyes in silent conversation. Ron sealed its outcome by breaking the silence, "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Harry said evenly. He then passed his hand over Hermione's hair. "And what do you want to do?"

She burned a hair. Slowly, a note of burnt hair added to the dull whiff of the dusty room. Every time she burned a hair, the flame hissed and grew for a split second.

"I'm not entirely sure yet. First I want to study." She smiled down at the candle. It was odd how none of them seemed to be able to actually look up while talking about their future plans. "I want to alter things. Maybe I'll try the Ministry afterwards. I want to become a politician in the Muggle world. I could try to improve things for all of us, couldn't I? For Muggleborns, halfbloods, Muggles, wizards, witches - everyone! The world could be so much better, if we'd go a little more hand in hand with each other."

Harry held her a little more tightly. She burned a hair. Ron smiled - this time there was less bitterness, something more true to his normal smile.

"So Harry wants to become a teacher, teaching children values they'll need. And an Auror, ridding the streets from criminals. And a Quidditch celebrity, so the children he teaches will have a good role model, someone to look up at.

"And I, I want to become a real Healer. One that studies in both worlds to cure the world from evil diseases. And I want to adopt an orphan.

"And you, 'Mione, want to actually better the world, bringing everybody together, creating peace at its very basis, fighting intolerance and bias.

"Listen to us! No wonder Malfoy called us saints. We are true world 'betterers'..." His smile became a humble one. "Who knows. Maybe we'll manage."

Harry and Hermione looked at their friend, his sudden change of mood striking them as a surprise. Eventually, however, they caught his smile - a smile weak and strange in the dim lit room. Hermione burned another hair. By now a ray of dawn reached through the window... and, as noticed by Ron, took away the light from his eyes.

"It's already dawning." All the worry was back in his face. He stared at the window. Dawn was still lilac. Maybe more night than morning. "He should be back by now...," he whispered at the window, "Long back."

Hermione burned a hair.

"Can you stop that?" Ron said rather crossly. "If you keep on burning your hair at that rate, you'll be bald by - wait a moment." At long last, he took a closer look at the hair and... "This hair is blond." He looked questioningly up at Hermione and she slid over to him, so she could explain to both him and Harry.

"It's Draco's hair. I've got some of Ginny's too. It's a charm. I burn their hair and if the flame stays the same - everything is neutral."

"Neutral?" Harry repeated.

"Well, I don't think that 'okay' is quite the right expression."

"Why didn't you tell me about this earlier?" Ron asked, now staring at the flames with new fascination and hope. The three candles still shone brightly, but their light was dulling to the approaching dawn.

"I... I wasn't sure whether I wanted to tell you about it. I mean, if the colour had changed, you'd be even more worried." She absentmindedly held a blond hair into the flame. "And -"

"Green! It's green!"

"What?" She looked down at the greenish flame and accidentally let go of the hair, which fell to the floor with green ember slowly eating it up.

Ron's eyes widened, Harry paled, yet still Ron was the first to blurt out, "What does it mean?"

"He... he's injured."

"Badly?"

"I don't know. I dropped the hair in surprise. What shade of green was it?"

"Light green," Harry said fast.

Hermione sighed in relief. "Then it's not serious. No lethal danger at least."

"Well, I certainly hope so," came a voice from the window.

All heads in the room jerked around. There was Draco at the window, making attempts to climb through. Ron immediately jumped up, only failing by inches to run one of the candles over. Moments later, the other two were also on their feet, as Ron helped Draco through the window.

"How are you?"

"What happened?"

"How is Ginny? Did she get it?"

Inside of the room, Draco slid down the wall underneath the window, not minding the soot and dirt.

"Where's the wound?" Ron asked.

Despite several cut on arms and face, Draco lifted his shirt to reveal a more serious one at his waist. Ron immediately began the healing charm.

"What happened?" Hermione repeated her question.

Draco turned his eyes away from Ron's hands at his side and faced the girl. "Some blokes attacked me on my way back."

"Heirs? Did they find out about you?"

"No. Actually, it was one of your patrols. I think it was Higgins who shot the first blow at me."

"Then it was Talitha's troupe," Harry stated.

"Yes, fortunately. She stunned them. Stunned them all. She told me to go on and hurry and that she'd memory charm them all afterwards," Draco said. He felt his wound close. "Thanks, Ron." He smiled.

"Shall I take care of those, too?" Ron gestured at his face and arms.

"Yes, please."

"And what about Ginny? Did she get them?" Harry repeated his questions.

Now Draco truly smiled. His eyes were getting a little brighter - war dust being blown away.

"She's fine. She's gorgeous! She's got them all fooled. By now she's right in their inner circle. She even got to talk to Voldemort."

"Fuck," Ron murmured.

But Draco just went on. "And, of course, she got the plans. Copied them all, the little vixen. Made a right show when I was there. Even asked me where I've been so long, in a really skeptical tone. Made everybody believe that she was so careful as to not even trust me." He took out several papers. "Here - the plans. She used a charm on them that I once invented. You've got to breathe on it to make the words actually visible. It will only react to the breath of one of the four of us."

"How did she do that?" Hermione asked fascinated, taking the papers from Draco, "I mean, how could she have used that charm? She hasn't seen the three of us in weeks."

"Don't know," Draco admitted, "She's damn clever."

By now, morning was shining through the window, taking away the light of the candles that had brought them through the night. Ron healed Draco's last cut as Hermione spread the sheets on the floor and breathed on them. The plans appeared. Draco's face darkened again.

"Now it's your turn," he said, as the three friends bent over the sheets to examine the plans.

Ron and Harry swore several times. Hermione studied the sheets, then took one of them to examine it more closely. She lifted her gaze to meet Draco's.

"Ginny actually got something about the Blind Depression?"

"Yes, she said it might especially interest you."

"She's right - it does."

After they'd studied the plans for about half an hour in silence, Ron looked up at Harry.

"So they'll start at Diagon Alley today."

"Yes, and that's where we'll be soon. Hermione?" She looked up. "We've got to go."

"Yes."

The three of them stood up and packed their stuff and the plans. Then Ron went over to blow out the candles.

"Wait!" Hermione held him back. Then she turned to Draco. "You'll stay here?"

"Yes. At least for the next thirty-six hours. I've got my own couple of plans to study and I need to catch some sleep."

"Could you watch the candles then?"

He raised an eyebrow.

"Okay."

She went over to Ron and gestured for Harry to follow her. She spoke a spell over the candles.

"Now burn one of your hairs in one of the flames." They did.

In silence they went over to the window and climbed through it towards the new day.

"Bye, Draco."

"See you."

Draco said nothing, but fixed his eyes to the undistinguished flames at the other end of the room.

***

fin