The Kiss

The Kiss

The building lay in shambles around them as they appeared in the middle of it all. Harry looked around, seeming to remember something, and then began to sift through the rubble to search for anything that could possibly be of importance.

"What if he knows?" Draco asked, watching Harry.

Harry shook his head. "He shouldn't," he said. "If he does than I don't know."

"He wouldn't destroy it on his own, would he?" Draco asked.

Harry shook his head again. "Would you destroy a piece of your own soul?" he asked.

Draco shook his head this time. "Not when you put it that way. Why did he attack this place?" he asked.

"This is where he grew up," Harry answered. "I don't think he likes the idea of it still being around."

Harry seemed to see something in the glow of the Dark Mark above them. Draco felt a chill run though him at the thought that this green is exactly the same green as the light from the Avada Kedavra curse.

"Help me," Harry said softly. Draco hopped from one piece of wall to the next to get to Harry. When he did, he could see Harry trying to lift what looked like four or five stairs. He quickly rushed to Harry's aid.

They were both panting heavily once the stairs were moved. Harry, not willing to be distracted by the lack of air, picked up an old, leather bound book. He looked closely at the cover and shook his head. He held it out to Draco.

"A raven," he said.

Draco looked at the cover and saw the Ravenclaw crest embossed on the cover. Draco chuckled. "Do you think this is the next Horcrux?" he asked.

Harry nodded. "That's what Dumbledore believed anyway," he said. "Something from the founders, Nagini, and Voldemort himself. I don't think he meant to leave that here.

"So what do we do with it?"

"Destroy it," Harry said simply. "But don't ever let a Ravenclaw or Madam Pince know what we're about to do to that book."

"Do you want to know what's in it?" Draco asked.

Harry shook his head. "I don't want to take that chance," he said softly. "Not after what I saw Dumbledore go through to get to the last one."

"What do you mean?" Draco asked as they began to walk away from the rubble.

"I mean he drank a potion and that potion made him weak enough to be struck down by you. I've seen him battle Voldemort, Draco, he wouldn't normally have been so easy to disarm, not when he knew you were coming."

"He knew I was coming?" Draco asked. "Why didn't he try to stop me?"

"He was preventing me from acting stupidly," Harry answered. "I was there the whole time."

Draco was suddenly struck with the severity of the situation. Harry had seen him nearly murder one of the most important people in his life and here Draco was, traveling with him night and day, sleeping in the same room with him, and Harry was calling him by his first name.

How much were they really putting aside for the sake of the war?

"Why did you want me to come with you?" Draco asked softly.

"We need to destroy this book," Harry said, dodging the question.

"That didn't answer my question," Draco said firmly. "Why me? Why not Granger or Weasley? They're both of age, you could have used magic instead of doing everything the hard way. Why did you choose me?"

"Things are different now," Harry answered. "With Ron and Hermione. They're dating, you know, so I...I feel like I'm intruding if I try and separate them or I go with them."

"That's why you didn't go with them yesterday," Draco said softly at the realization.

Harry nodded, but Draco was left with the feeling that there was more to it than just that. There was something in the way Harry avoided looking at anything but the ground at his feet as he said that that made Draco wonder what it was.

"But you're with that Weasley girl, aren't you?"

Potter chuckled. "No," he answered. "Not anymore. We were for a few months, but I broke up with her at Dumbledore's funeral. I can't put anyone in that kind of danger. I can't be with anyone while Voldemort's still out there."

Draco inwardly sighed. "Is that why you've been avoiding her letters?" he asked.

"I haven't been avoiding her letters," Harry protested. "I just haven't had time."

"Bullshit," Draco said. "You haven't even opened the last three you received and I know you've got plenty of time because we don't do that much. Every night we settle down and you have plenty of time to write a reply, even if it's only a word or two. Things are fine but I can't talk, for instance. Something simple. She wouldn't freak out then. And I'm sure Weasley finds time to write."

"I'm not Ron," Harry said strongly as he stopped suddenly. "I'm not Ron, I'm not Hermione, I'm not Ginny, and I'm not you! If I don't write it's because I don't have anything to say. If I ignore a letter or two or three who cares?"

Draco suddenly saw what Harry was doing.

"You think you're going to die in this war, don't you?" he asked suddenly, before Harry could continue. "That's why you're distancing yourself from them! You're not avoiding Weasley and Granger because you feel like you're intruding, you're avoiding them so that they can get used to a life without you! You're not ignoring what's-her-face's letters because you don't want her to get hurt, you're avoiding them so that she doesn't feel the pain when you kick it! For someone who faces life and death situations every day, you sure as hell don't know how to fucking live, Potter," Draco spat. "Get a goddamn grip. You could be dead by morning, do you really want them to have memories of you where you're distant?"

Harry's face grew confused as he tried to understand what Draco wasn't saying.

"Let's take care of that stupid book," Draco said bitterly. He took the book from Harry and tapped it with his wand. "Incendio," he said, causing the book to catch fire.

They returned to the Burrow in silence, the remains of the book having been scattered. Harry walked ahead of Draco and knocked on the back door.

Granger stuck her head through the curtains. "It's Harry!" she called. She opened the door.

"WAIT!" Mr. Weasley called as he came running into the room. He sighed in frustration upon seeing the door open and Harry and Draco walk though. "Doesn't anyone care about the proper way to do things anymore?" he asked.

"Harry, what form does your patronus take?" Granger asked.

"A stag," Harry answered, almost boredly.

Granger turned back to Mr. Weasley. "See?" she asked. "It's Harry."

"One day he might not be," Mr. Weasley said in a weary tone.

"He's right, Hermione," Harry said softly. "That's one rule from the Ministry we should follow."

"Finally!" Mr. Weasley cried. "Someone who knows what it takes to be safe!"

Harry chuckled slightly as Mr. Weasley left the room.

"So?" Weasley asked from his post at the table. "What happened?"

"We got rid of another Horcrux," Harry said. "There are three left now."

"The chalice, the snake, and Voldemort?" Granger asked as she sat down next to her boyfriend. Harry nodded.

"Did you talk to your dad about the licenses?" he asked Weasley.

The redhead nodded. "Yeah, he says that it doesn't matter right now, the Ministry's too worried about the war to care about people Apparating without a license. He said he'll try to get us in though, just to be on the safe side. Mum wants us to stay here for a while, until you get your licenses anyway. Bill's wedding and all."

Harry sighed and sat down, Draco followed suit.

"Where are we sleeping?"

"Mum says that you two can take Fred and George's room since there's two beds and Hermione can have Percy's."

"Has there been any word from him yet?"

Weasley shook his head. "He's still a stupid git," he said. "He won't even come for the wedding."

"He's not?" Granger asked.

"No," Harry's girlfriend said as she entered the room. "He refuses to apologize and Bill said he can't come to the wedding unless he does."

"What are you going to do, Gin?" Granger asked. "Now that you don't have school."

"I was hoping I could go with you," she said softly, her eyes locked on Harry.

Harry immediately shook his head. "No," he said strongly. "Your mother wouldn't allow it. Besides, it's too dangerous and you're not of age yet."

She glared at him. "I have been as much a part of this as you have, Harry," she said bitterly. "You know I can fight, you have no right telling me I can't."

"No, but I do," Mrs. Weasley said, appearing out of nowhere. "Thank you, Harry," she said. "For understanding."

Harry nodded.

"But the school is closed," Weasley said in his sister's defense. "Why can't she come with us?"

"Because it's not safe, Ronald," Mrs. Weasley snapped. "And you'd best feel lucky I don't lock you up in your room to keep you from going. Harry's got to do this; he's the only one with any reason to. Now I can't stop Hermione or Draco from helping, but by Merlin, I can stop you. I am still your mother and you will listen to me. When I say Ginny can't go, I mean Ginny can't go."

Ginny glared at her mother fiercely before storming up the stairs. The five of them heard a distant slam and knew she had just locked herself up in her room.

Later that night, after they had trudged up the stairs to bed, Draco couldn't take his eyes off of Harry as he watched him change for bed. He was struck by Harry's beauty and even more awed at how little the other man knew how good he really looked--which only made him look a million times better.

Draco loved the way Harry's hair looked most of all. It was the just-off-the-broom or just-out-of-bed look and Draco had never seen anyone else pull off--and Harry did it naturally!

Draco's eyes travelled down along Harry's long neck to his smooth chest. The toned muscles could be seen as he moved to pull a shirt on.

His gaze traveled lower still and hovered on the waist of Harry's pants. He sat frozen, wondering what lay under the cloth but not allowing himself to actually think about it. The last thing he needed was to get aroused and have Harry find out about it.

"Do you like what you see?"

Harry's voice caused Draco to jump. "Huh?" he asked stupidly.

"Do you like what you see?" Harry asked again, slower this time.

"What makes you think I was looking?" Draco asked, feeling his face flush slightly.

"You've been watching me for about five minutes," Harry answered, sitting down on his bed.

Draco looked to the floor. "No I wasn't," he said, determined not to look Harry in the eye. After what he put Harry though, Draco knew that he had no right to stare, no right to lust, no right to desire.... He should burn in hell for what he'd done and he knew it.

"Suit yourself," Harry sighed as he lay back, pulling the covers with him as he went. "Turn out the lights when you go to sleep," he requested.

Over the next two nights it only got worse for Draco. It didn't seem to matter what he did, he kept seeing Harry's body as he'd changed. It haunted his dreams, his nightmares, his fantasies. The next two days, Draco tried to avoid being in the same room when the Boy Who Lived changed, but somehow he always managed to walk in right when Harry's shirt was off.

He was beginning to hate his body for the way it reacted to Harry's.

Then, on the day of Bill's wedding, Draco found himself face-to-face with Harry in dress robes.

Merlin he was gorgeous. The black robes fell elegantly about him and his green eyes shown brilliantly.

The only problem Draco saw was that Ginny was at his side constantly. He wished he could be her, that he could be the one with Harry, but he knew he was foolish to wish for such things. As much as he knew Harry was trying to push her away, Draco could see a light in his eyes that was there only when she was around and she was happy.

"Why are you watching him?" Granger asked, after separating herself from her other half. "What's so interesting?"

Draco shook his head. "Why do you care?" he asked.

"Harry's happy with her," Granger said strongly. "Don't you dare try to mess that up."

"If anyone messes anything up it will be them, not me," Draco answered. "I know my place."

"How long?" she asked.

"Which?" he asked. "That I've been out and gay or that I've wanted him?"

"Both," she said softly.

"I've never been out," he said, "I've known I was gay for about eight years now, and I've wanted him for longer than I knew about. But I'm just a fag lusting after a straight man so there's no harm done. He doesn't want me, I know it. It doesn't change the fact that I still want him."

"Don't count your chickens before they hatch," she said softly.

"What?"

"It's a Muggle saying," she explained. "It means don't be so sure of something you don't know."

"Are you saying that he's not straight and I do have a chance?"

"No," she said simply. "I'm saying that nothing is set in stone, especially when it comes to Harry. If he is that way, none of us know about it. Hell, if he is, I don't think even he knows about it."

"That way, huh?" Draco asked, feeling slightly offended.

"I didn't mean it like that," Granger said, reading Draco's voice. "There's no need to get defensive."

"I'm sorry," Draco found himself saying softly. "For everything I've ever done or said to you that made you feel the way I wanted you to. I didn't know you before," he said, "in many ways I still don't, but now I know you well enough to see that everything I've ever said was without just cause. I didn't see anything before--rose colored glasses...."

"Except that instead of making the world happy, they made it cruel, didn't they?" she asked softly.

Draco nodded. Before he had run into them, the world had been a cold cruel place. Now there was life, energy, happiness even.