The Secret Diary of Cho Chang Aged 15 and 3/4

July 24^th 6:30pm

Oh God, Oh God, Oh God. Where can I even start? Where to begin? Well, my Mum suggested to me to buy a diary in order for me to "sort out my feelings out", whatever that means. She says that if I write down absolutely everything, that in my mind everything will make perfect sense. I don't see how that can be true, I mean, I'm a Ravenclaw, we don't have random thoughts.

Hmm... I really should have bought those shoes I saw in Diagon Alley today.

LOOK! Ravenclaws, me, I, do not have random thoughts. There is a logical reason behind everything. Its just....well, who can explain what happened to Cedric? Where's the logic there? Who can explain why a man, just starting out can get brutally murdered? Well, Harry Potter can tell me, but I've not owled him or anything. Well. What could I write??

"Dear Harry, hope you are well, can you tell me what really happened on that night, how Cedric really died? Speak soon, Cho

Oh God, I think I'm going to start crying again. That's all I've done over the past few weeks.

7:30pm

Right, I'm ok now, I just keep having these crying fits. I couldn't hold my quill anymore an hour ago. OK, right, I'll be the first too admit that my head has been all over the place this past month. Ever since Cedric died, and seeing Harry bringing back his body, it was like time stood still. I just couldn't believe that I would never see him again, that I wouldn't see his head bobbing over everyone in the corridor again. And his smile..... his smile.... I think I'll miss that the most, and his laugh. Yes, he had the most wonderful laugh. Isn't that weird? I'll just miss the little things, but his laugh, I'll never forget that.

God, Mum's calling me, I have to go

July 29^th

It was so weird, I was just walking down to the shops earlier on and I started crying. In front of all these muggles. I just remembered Cedric playing Quidditch against us. He loved Quidditch, it was probably his biggest passion if I'm being totally honest. No, that's not right, that's not fair.

I wonder when I'll get to wear that new jumper, Mum said I could wear it for my birthday.

God, I AM LOSING MY MIND. It's just that sometimes I see Cedric everywhere. In my dreams, walking down the road, in the shops. EVERYWHERE. Then there are times when I don't think of him at all. And then when I remember, I feel even worse because I forgot about him. What sort of girl does that make me? How can I forget my boyfriend?

He was in my dream last night. We were at the Yule Ball last year, and we were dancing. He was twirling me round and round and Cedric said to me that I looked lovely. Then he twirled me around again and the next thing I knew Snape was staring down at me instead. I woke up after that, couldn't face going back to sleep after that. Snape??!!! Eurgh!! So, I wrote Harry a note and sent it with Andromeda. It was quite a simple note really. I just asked him how he was. I remember seeing him at the school feast at the end of the year. I don't think I've ever seen anyone anyone look so desolate and alone. I couldn't speak to him then. I knew whatever I said would come out wrong and I didn't want him to think that I blamed him for Cedric's death.

Hmmm.. well, as this is my diary, and no-one else will read it, I have to be honest. I did blame him at first. I mean, there he was, with Cedric's body. They'd been gone for ages, and the next thing we knew, Harry was back with Cedric's body. What else could I think? Its stupid, I never thought he actually killed Cedric, and especially after what Professor Dumbledore said, but, well Harry was there. Everything seems to happen around him. Is it so wrong to want to know what happened? Actually, thinking about it now, I probably shouldn't have sent that note. I mean, it's not as if I know Harry that well. Bloody sleep deprivation, he probably thinks I'm some sort of loon.

Mum said she would take me to a medi-wizard if I didn't start eating properly. That's the last thing I want, someone prodding me and asking all sorts of personal questions. I'm just tired, that's all, I just need some sleep and I'll be fine. I'm sure I will.