True Feelings

True Feelings

Bookworm. Mudblood. Know-It-All. Miss Perfect.

These are names that I call a girl at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I guess I should tell you the real name behind all of these nicknames. The girl I'm talking about is Hermione Granger.

She's a Mudblood-ahem-a Muggle born, meaning that she has Muggle parents. She's the best witch of our year at school and quite annoying. She can't fly a broom to save her life and Pansy says that she's ugly and doesn't know why Viktor Krum asked her to the Yule Ball in fourth year. I must agree that in first year, she looked like a frizz ball. Though now I'm going to contradict myself.

I think that she's the most gorgeous girl here at Hogwarts. Her hair is now tamed down a bit and she doesn't have buckteeth anymore. She watches the Gryffindor Quidditch team every practice and is always in the library. She's set on getting people signed up on S.P.E.W. and I'm even tempted to sign on to it just to be with her more.

All of these things I know about her may make it seem like I stalk her. Well, I don't. Or at least, I don't think so. I just watch her all the time. Actually, not all the time. I can't watch her in the Gryffindor Tower or the bathroom. But other than that, I like to watch her. I watch her with Potter and Weasley. I watch her during classes. I watch her while I'm playing and watching Quidditch.

I'm just completely captivated with her. She seems to be hiding behind her books, and her personality seems completely different, mysterious even. I want to know her true personality. Not being reserved or holding back anything.

But I know that won't happen. She hates me. Just hates me. Well, I suppose I did give her a few reasons. I call her Mudblood and bother her and Potter and Weasley. I honestly don't like Potter or Weasley any better than I did my first day here, but my views on her have definitely changed.

I know that she will never, ever want to have a regular conversation with me. I just want to talk to her without a wall. Without Potter and Weasley hanging around. Just her and I, two normal teenagers who have a chat to get to know each other. I know that we would never have a conversation that didn't involve me accidentally calling her Granger or her saying 'I hate you, Malfoy' or 'Go away, Malfoy'.

I wish that I wasn't me. I know that sounds funny, but I wish I was just like any other guy at school (actually, any guy who isn't in Slytherin) who could just start hanging around her and then ask her out. Sometimes I wish I were in stupid Weasley's shoes. It's buzzing around the school that she likes him, but he's too thick to even see it. If I were in his shoes, I would have asked her out ages ago. I would support her weird clubs like S.P.E.W. and I'd have her tutor me. But just because I'm in Slytherin and my father's a Death Eater and I'm a Malfoy, she won't even give me a second glance. She won't even give me a first glance. She'll just glare at me.

Well, now that I've told you my true feelings (I've told no one else mind you), I'm going to go to the Great Hall and try to catch some peeks at the only girl I've truly ever really wanted to know.