Someday

How the hell did we wind up like this?

Why weren't we able

To see the signs that we missed

and tried to turn the tables?

I wish you'd unclench your fists

and unpack your suitcase

Lately there's been too much of this,

but don't think it's too late

Nothin's wrong just as long as you know that someday I will

Sirius...I love him...yet I despise him. He was my love, my soul mate, my life mate, and I can never see him again. Naturally, you think Merlin would stop picking on me by now wouldn't you? Yes I do realize that it is not in my nature to complain, but I really think that I got the 'shit-end -of- the -stick' as people would say. I hate Merlin, I really do. First he gives me a lycanthropy, then my parents disown me because of it, then I turn out to be gay which wouldn't be a bad thing if The Whole Order didn't know, and James and Lily died on me, and Sirius... I loved him. My mate, my heart, my soul; he was the very essence of my being. Sirius was my past, present... and what I thought to be my future. We were in love. He loved my Sirius...the man all the women loved...Sirius, the envy of all the men...Sirius&helip;intelligent, free, handsome and daring, yet wise and beautiful at the same time. The sea of waist length black hair that flowed around him, his tan, smooth face, those full, succulent lips that I wish to taste. However, the most entrancing thing about him was his eyes; solid, cobalt blue and storm-cloud gray colored eyes which held great laughter, yet emphasized both his great wisdom and heart aches. It is amazing how his eyes could be fierce, yet gentle serious, yet laughing all simultaneously. Those eyes that bore into my soul and which melted my heart with a single glance. I loved him, but he left me.

Someday, somehow I'm gonna make it alright,

but not right now

I know you're wondering when

(You're the only one who knows that)

Someday, somehow I'm gonna make it alright,

but not right now

I know you're wondering when

I am completely empty. I am no longer like a shell that has been abandoned for years; I am the shell. I no longer maintain that optimistic light that used to be bound to my soul...the light has gone out. I no longer hold all of the logical explanations I thought I did...I just don't have the strength. I don't fight for what I believe in...who care what people think? I don't. I finally realized what I am inside...dead. So, why exist among the living and be hollow inside? Why don't I just end it now? Actually, that's precisely what I intend to do.

And I hope that since we're here anyway,

we can end it, saying

Things we've always needed to say,

so we can end up staying

Now the story's played out like this

just like a paperback novel

Let's rewrite an ending that fits

instead of a Hollywood horror

Nothin's wrong just as long as you know that someday I will

Damn it...she caught me. Tonks that little bitch almost got me landed in St. Mungos. Thank fully, Dumbledore just wants me to go to counseling to express my 'inner feelings'... whatever the fuck that means. Doesn't really matter...it's been two weeks and they all think I'm better. Yeah, right. Just a little tip for all of you people out there... I was a Marauder, meaning I was with James and Sirius getting into trouble. Now, if those two taught me anything, it was how to lie...and good. Doesn't matter...I'm not even going to kill myself anymore. Want to hear something funny? I'm pregnant with Sirius' baby. Want to know something really funny? I didn't even know werewolves could get pregnant [You think they could of mentioned that in one of the hundreds of Werewolf mating habits books I've read, right? Oh no...they conveniently left that out of the books I've read.] Its okay though... at least I'll have some sort of family now. I just better get home okay...I think I'll take my car.

Someday, somehow I'm gonna make it alright,

but not right now

I know you're wondering when

(You're the only one who knows that)

Someday, somehow I'm gonna make it alright,

but not right now

I know you're wondering when

(You're the only one who knows that)

I swear, some people just can't drive...like the guy in front of me. Where did he get his license... a Cracker Jack box? He just won't stop swerving in and out of lanes...it's really irritating. Actually, he seems kind of...drunk. Not -to -mention he's changing to the left lane without signaling...no, wait...he's swerving about ninety miles per hour into...my lane?! Oh SHIT-

WHAM!

How the hell did we wind up like this?

Why weren't we able

To see the signs that we missed

and tried to turn the tables?

I can't believe it...it's dead. The baby is dead. The drunk driver on the highway... he crashed into my car and I went whamming into a pole and the seat belt...it...it... crushed the baby's head. I can't take it anymore...I really can't. But then again, there is that dagger used for cutting clothe over there. Let me just get my hands on it.

I wish you'd unclench your fists

"I have to gather my strength..."

and unpack your suitcase

"I'm almost there..."

Lately there's been too much of this,

"I just about got it..."

but don't think it's too late

"Yes ..."

Nothin's wrong...

"And now I DIE!"

just as long as you know that someday I will

"Oh my Merlin...REMUS!"

'Oh no...not...Snape.'

Someday, somehow I'm gonna make it alright,

but not right now

I know you're wondering when

(You're the only one who knows that)

"It's okay Remus...I'll let you go..."

Someday, somehow I'm gonna make it alright,

but not right now

"Thank you..."

I know you're wondering when

"Good bye Remus."

"Good bye Severus."

I know you're wondering when

"Finally...I'm ...free" and Remus' world went black

I know you're wondering when

~ Severa Septima Snape