This Is Not The End

Is it true what they say?

Are we too blind to find a way?

Fear of the unknown,

Cloud our hearts today.

That's what we thought only a few days ago but now the tables have turned and you had to be under all of it. We knew Voldemort's plan but we couldn't find a way to stop it from unravelling. I could just imagine that bastard and his filthy followers laughing at us and calling us sightless to the future. It didn't help that I was afraid of what might happen to you, what Voldemort would do to you, but it happened and I couldn't do anything apart from watch with frozen eyes.

Come into my world,

See through my eyes,

Try to understand,

Don't want to lose what we have,

Don't leave us Harry, don't leave me! We all need you but I need more. You gave me your gentle love and care and I returned it. But now, I have to watch you, my dear, die and I curse myself for not being able to do anything to save you. Except hold your hand and hug you and sob sweet nothings to you to ease your pain.

We've been dreaming,

For who can't deny,

It's the best way of living,

Between the truth and the lies.

Yes, only living in dreams of the future. Of a world without the fear of Voldemort hanging over it like a think and heavy blanket, but was that the best way to go about it? I didn't know and now seeing you; I believe more and more that it was might have not been. Perhaps we all should have taken our eyes off the goal to see the dark and overwhelming obstacle that blocked our path.

See who I am,

Break through the surface,

Reach for my hand,

And shout out that we can.

I love you Harry, please don't leave me! What will I do without you? I want you to hold me and comfort me while you can. And then, that way, I'll might, just might, be able to repair my heart. Or what's left of it; it's fading away along with the world through your eyes. Tell me you'll live though this and that you'll defeat Voldemort another day. What's a world without you? You've always been in mine.

Free your mind and find a way,

The world is our hands.

This is not the end.

Fear is withering the soul,

At the point of no return,

We must be the change we wish to see.

I can see you're trying to help yourself, trying to help me, trying to help us, but you're fading away just like your blood in the ever increasing pool I kneel in. If you survive this we'll get vengeance on Voldemort and then that will be the end of evil, the fear in everyone's mind and the danger we wake up to everyday.

I wish to tell you to recover, to live through this, but I know it's ridiculous and at the same time a want you to go, so you needn't suffer more than need be, but then I'll just carry on, and you won't be there to support me, like you have before.

I'll come into you world,

See through your eyes,

I'll try to understand,

Before we lose what we have.

Your breaths come short and painful, each lungful of torture you inhale to try and stay awake with me. But we both know that you'll go soon, if only I could come with you and be with you. Or perhaps to find out what you had in mind to defeat Voldemort so I could carry on your destiny for you. I wonder if you will come back as a ghost, but even if you did, you will be wondering around, alone and forlorn, here in this deserted place.

We just can't stop believing,

Because we have to try,

We can rise above the truth and the lies.

Oh, what am I to do? I feel so helpless to save you! I'm trying Harry, searching my mind but I can find nothing. Oh please believe me dearest, I'm doing my best, better than I have ever worked on, but I can't. I can't do anything; all I can do is read books and be an A star student but I can't do anything! I hate myself for it! There's no cure for life or death, I know, but still feel the need to do something for you; my heart screams at me to do so.

See who I am,

Break through the surface,

Reach for my hand,

And shout that we can.

Free your mind and find a way,

The world is in our hands,

This is not the end.

I can't believe this is the end of you, I refuse to. I refuse to accept that the greatest wizard is dying and no one can save him. You thought of everyone, all the others in this world who expected you to save them from catastrophe, but should you have been that bit more selfish? So you could be you, not some household name plastered on a brave face and story. So you could savour a longer lingering moment with the people you truly care for; you never had enough, always the lone solder with such a mission on your shoulders to carry until the day you or Voldemort died.

Your eyes begin to freeze with the mist of the next life, your mouth open in silent greeting for it, but your strong hand remains firm in mine, determined to stay with me for as long as you can.

Hear the silence.

Reach out my blame.

Will our strength remain?

If the power rise.

I can't stand it! I reach for my wand and now determined to end my life and then we can be together forever.

But with your last breath, you groan and shake your heavy head, eyes rolling towards mine, holding in them my pools of tears, "No 'Mione...you need to go... and get him." With that you add, "I love you Hermione...always and forever...please don't forget...me."

Your hand squeezes mine, pressing all your love into my palm and push it towards my heart. You smile weakly then your beautiful blue eyes close for the last time but with the last picture on your mind of me. You cease breathing your painful air and fall limp.

I cry harder, forcing new tears to roll down my already tear-stained face and body racketing moans of grief escape my mouth and echo for an eternity along the empty ground.

I lay down, defeated, across your still chest, crying, and all I think about is that now you are gone and why now? The most important man in my life, The Boy Who Lived, the boy who had held, kissed and caressed me, was now The Boy Who Died, never to be my beacon in the dark, my warm pillow at night or to be the one who I could ever marry and share a life with.

I feel now I live for nothing; the weekends cuddled up together will never happen again and the school halls will be empty now without you there. I reach for my wand one last time, stroking its soft vine curve. I believe that this is the only rash thing I'll ever do but I know you'll forgive me; that I couldn't live without you, you made me so complete, more than I first realised. No one else could do what you could have done. I kiss your cold lips and determinedly grip my wand.

I cry no more tears; a strange calm has descended down and washed through me.

I mutter, "Avada Kedavra."

I feel my self soaring. Through dark and light. Through silence and deafening noise. Through heat and coolness. Travelling at no speed yet faster than can be felt. In no direction and yet to everywhere at once. I'm in no place I can recognise nor reconcile yet I know I've come full circle. I feel at peace, because I am at home.

See who I am,

Break through the surface,

Reach for my hand,

And shout that we can.

Free your mind and find a way,

The world is in our hands,

This is not the end.

See who I am.