Too Much That I'm Asking For

It's the first time I've ever felt this lonely

Wish someone would cure this pain

It's funny when you think it's gonna work out...

Lily Evans walked alone through the corridors of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and sighed. She felt so lonely and confused. And it was mainly because of him. Remus Lupin.

He just acted so weird and strange every so often. And it was really kind of annoying. But there was something there that couldn't be seen, a sort of longing in him that made it hard for Lily to completely hate him.

I thought you were cool until the point

Up until the point you didn't call me when you said you would

Finally figured out you're all the same

Always coming up with some kind of story

Remus was always doing something when she wanted to see him. He would always have to cancel something because a relative got sick or died or he had some oddly scheduled family reunion. At some points he wouldn't even bother with much. He had some times where he would be nice, but then he would become quiet and more tired than usual, every month or so. And there would be nothing she could do for him about it. It was as if he just didn't trust her.

Every time I try to make you smile

You're always feeling sorry for yourself

Every time I try to make you laugh

You can't you're too tough

You think you're loveless

Is that too much that I'm asking for?

He really could be amazing, but he'd be mysterious at the same time. Lily just didn't know what to do with him anymore. Maybe she should forget about him.

"Hey, Lily."

Lily didn't turn around, but she knew it was Remus. What did he want? Not now. She kept on walking.

"Lily?"

But who could avoid that voice, that voice with a note of pain and urgency in it? Well, Lily would try. She continued walking with Remus following her. And then he stopped.

"Alright...I'll leave you alone, then," said Remus, turning around and heading in the other direction.

Thought you'd come around when I ignored you

Sorta thought you'd have the decency to change

Quite suddenly, Lily turned around. "No, Remus, come back."

He turned around to face her, his amber eyes looking into her emerald ones. "Look," he said after a moment. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry for all of this...you know...not always being here and such."

"Well," Lily said, "it's not really your fault. It's not like you can control what's been going on."

Something in Remus' eyes flickered, another expression going over his face that Lily couldn't read. "Yeah..." he muttered.

Lily felt sympathy for him again, wishing he could tell her what upset him. "It was nice of you to come and say this."

"You really think so?" Remus asked.

"Yes," said Lily. "Very kind. You can be such a gentleman." She smiled at him, to which she only got a half-hearted smile in return. His eyes didn't quite meet hers, and they didn't look happy.

Every time I try to make you smile

You're always feeling sorry for yourself

Every time I try to make you laugh

"I'm sorry about all this again," Remus said. "I'm not really myself at this time." He sighed. "It's just something, do you know what I mean? And then there's this...er...I really do like you, Lily, but..."

You can't you're too tough

You think you're loveless

"Remus," Lily began. "I...do like you as well, but you just always seem to be bothered by something."

His eyes began flickering to the floor. She continued.

"I'd just like to know what it is. Really. Please, I promise not to laugh or tell someone or anything like that."

Remus looked back up at her. "No...no...It's best if I don't say anything. I've got to be off. Goodbye Lily." He walked off down the hall.

Lily's eyes followed the retreating figure down the hall. When he was nearly out of sight, she closed her eyes and shook her head a bit sadly.

It was too much that I'm asking for.