Never Ending Daylight

She wandered down the deserted hallway, not paying attention to where she was or what was going on around her. She did not notice the inhabitants of the paintings all down the hallway whispering to each other as she passed.

Had she been listening, she would have heard the same thing murmured from just about every portrait. "That's her," she would hear. "I heard that she is the only one who returned to the castle."

But she wasn't paying attention to them and she didn't hear the whispers. She didn't hear the laughter of celebration that echoed softly through the entire castle, strengthening as one wandered closer to any of the four common rooms, the teacher's lounge or the Great Hall. She didn't notice the feeling of excitement that still trembled through the air, over a week after the good news had been broken to the school while she lay unconscious in the Hospital Wing. The school and world alike were celebrating the wonderful day that they had been saved, that they had been freed once again.

But she didn't pay attention to any of that. She didn't feel any of that. She only felt the pain.

She hugged herself tightly, her eyes void of any tears. Her body was numb to the sadness that was trying desperately to overtake her. She wandered aimlessly down the hallway, her feet taking her on the well-known path that she had covered so many times before.

With them, she thought to herself, looking around for the first time and recognizing where she was. Through the window beside her she could see the lake. The water was still and quiet; there were not many people out and among the grounds. The sun had dipped below the horizon and the inky black sky was full of twinkling specks of light. Suns from far away. She wished for them to be closer, wished that they could shed their light during the bleak hours when the Earth's own sun dipped out of the sky and plunged her world into the darkness. She never wanted to wait through the darkness for sunrise again. She never wanted to fear the darkness.

She hadn't been awake long enough to realize what she was scared of. She just knew she was terrified of something. She allowed her eyes to wander across the grounds and watched the twinkling stars reflected in the glassy surface of the lake. As she looked over the school grounds all the memories she had been fighting all day rushed to the forefront of her mind. She sank to her knees, bending to touch her forehead to the cold, stone floor. Don't think about it, don't think about them, do not remember, she told herself silently, over and over again. But as she thought it, faces flashed before her mind, familiar faces that she loved. Faces that were cracked and broken, strewn aside in the fray. The sunlight kept the memories at bay. The sunlight brought warmth that had been absent from that vacant hill. The darkness brought the cold. The darkness brought the memories.

And the darkness brought his laughter.

"Nonononononono...." She muttered quietly in rapid succession, pulling herself up to sitting, leaning against the wall for support. She wrapped her arms around her knees and rocked, back and forth, whispering to herself. "No...no...no..."

She could hear screams of pain, people screaming words she couldn't make out. But above all, she could hear the laughter - his laughter. The hideous laughter echoed in her mind and overtook all her senses.

"Please stop...go away..." she mumbled, holding her head and trying to force the rush of sound out of her mind. "He's gone...he's gone..." she whispered, still rocking back and forth slowly.

Slowly, she wrestled the sounds and the images, the memories, back into the locked box at the back of her mind, swearing to herself to never let them out again. No matter what the darkness tried to persuade her to remember, she would whole-heartedly refuse. She never wanted to think about it, talk about it, see it ever again.

Oh how she wished for never ending daylight.

She lay, curled in a small ball, supporting her weight with the stone wall, until the sounds died away and she was left with the familiar silence of the castle. She slowly removed her hands from her ears, testing to be sure the screams and the laughter were really gone before leaning her head back, staring up at the flicker candles in sconces that lit the hallway happily.

Had it really been over a week? It still seemed like moments. She could still feel the lingering pain, the remaining effects of that curse. She could still hear the wind rustling the trees, the only sound that broke the silence when it was all over. She could still see them all, lying scattered on the ground, scattered and broken beyond anything she would ever be able to fix. Beyond anything any healer would ever be able to fix. She didn't want to see them or hear them or feel anything from that night. She wanted to forget it completely.

She had begged and pleaded with Madam Pomfrey to wipe her memory, to make her forget. But the nurse had refused, though tearfully. The nurse had said that remembering the past was the only way to avoid repeating it and that someone in the world needed to be able to remember what happened that night. And, as the only survivor, even though she didn't know everything that happened, she needed to be able to remember everything she could.

So now, she was stuck with these memories that she tried to keep locked away and hidden so that she didn't have to see them and think about them.

But when the sky turned dark, and the wind rustled the trees like they had that night not so long ago, the memories fought their way to her eyes and she had not yet learned how to completely fight them back.

"Ginny!" she heard someone call her name down the long hall and turned her head slightly just in time to see a familiar form striding towards her. His face was creased with worry and she could see fear in his blue eyes as he fell to his knees beside her. "Oh, Ginny," he said quietly, wrapping his arms around her. She willingly gave her weight over to him, nuzzling her head into his chest. He stroked her long red hair and whispered softly into her ear. "Hush, Ginny. I'm here now. Everything's okay."

"It's dark," she said quietly, shifting as he leaned back against the wall. She laid her head in his lap and pulled her knees up towards her chest.

"Yes, love. It is night."

"I don't like the dark, Seamus," she whispered.

"It's alright, Ginny. Nothing is going to happen to you. I promise. I'm here," he whispered, lowering his face to brush a kiss across her hairline. "I'm here."

"I know. But the dark...they come back in the dark. Why can't it always be daylight?"

"Because the world doesn't work like that, love, and even magic can't change the sun and the Earth's path. But if I could change it, I would."

"I know." He held her tightly as she stared at nothing in particular in front of her, her eyes refusing to focus on a single thing for fear that it might spark another memory.

"Why did you leave the Hospital Wing? Madam Pomfrey was worried about you - I was worried about you. We didn't know where you had gone."

"I couldn't be there," was all she said, with a shake of her head and a shiver that ran down her spine. There was too much there, too many memories, too many thoughts. It was too dark, too quiet there. She had been seeking light, sound, a place that didn't hold memories. That didn't have memories of them. She didn't want to think about them, any of them.

"Alright. It's alright. Come on, we'll go somewhere else. Let's go somewhere a little more comfortable," he said quietly, helping her up. She leaned against him as he led her down the hallway and into an abandoned classroom. There were tattered couches in the far corner and she smiled weakly. The room held memories. But they were mostly good ones, and none of the memories involved any of them. Only him.

With a wave of his wand and a few murmured words, bright candles illuminated the room. He led her to the couches and lowered her softly onto one of them. He sat beside her as she curled her legs beneath her like a cat and leaned heavily on his shoulder. His arms snaked around her protectively as he trailed soft kisses along the top of her head.

"He's really gone, isn't he, Seamus?"

"Yes, Ginny. He's gone," he echoed her softly.

"They're gone, aren't they?"

"Yes. They're gone," he fought back the lump in his throat and the tears that threatened to betray him.

She nodded weakly, biting her lower lip to keep it from quivering. Her breaths became ragged as she fought the sobs welling in her throat before she finally allowed her shoulder to shake and gave over to the tears welling inside her. Her body began to tremble as she finally allowed herself to cry.

"It's over..." she whispered, almost inaudible.

He closed his eyes and swallowed a sob, holding her tightly to him. "Yes, love. It's all over."