Leaving

Waiting and hoping,

Watching and praying;

Replaying the words

Of the rubbish you were saying

To make me forgive you,

To make the lies true;

To make me forget

My trust in you.

Mumbling and cursing,

Smiling and rehearsing

My most genuine fake smile

To keep your lips from pursing

At how childish I'm being;

How naïve I am for not seeing

Through the half-truths you told me

To keep me from leaving

When I could have walked without getting hurt;

When I could have left without feeling like dirt:

Walked all over by you

Like I'm not even worth

A roper kiss,

Or a promise you'll miss

All that we had

All eternity, then this:

Nothing.

You did this. You reduced me to nothing. Or you think you did.

You walked all over my pride; my ego; my self-respect. And, oh yes, my heart too.

You strung me along. Did you and she laugh at me behind my back? Did you chuckle at how naïve, how gullible I was for believing that you loved me?

You lied to me, and then made me feel like shit for doubting you. You made me feel like shit for thinking wrongly of you. Only, I was right.

You made me want to believe in you. You looked at me with those eyes. Those eyes that stared at me when you made love to me; when you kissed me; when you studied with me; when you told me I was beautiful. And you were saying the same things to her, weren't you? Weren't you?

You know what? I'll be damned if I give you the satisfaction of falling apart in front of you, and everyone else who's just waiting to see what move I'll make next.

Chin up. Shoulders thrown back. Head high.

You're leaving me? Good riddance.

You're going to her, you say? I don't know which one to pity more.

You hope we can still stay friends? Well, mankind hopes for world peace: doesn't mean it's happening.

You never meant to hurt me? Did you think about that while you were with her?

You honestly did love me? Yes, of course I'm going to believe that now.

You don't understand how I didn't see this coming? Tough. I just didn't. I mean, silly me, I just thought you'd be faithful to me. You know, because you loved me, and all that.

You didn't lie to me, except for that little bit toward the end? Oh, sure. And the giants are vegetarians.

You made me doubt myself. I thought I was uglier than she is. That I was dumb. And not good enough for you. I actually wanted to change every bit of myself just to hold on to you. That's over, definitely. I'm not the one with the problem.

Anything I want to say to you? Yeah, you can just take your sincerity and fu...no. No. You know what? Just...just keep her happy. Be faithful to her, at least. It's the least anyone deserves.

Anything I want? A hug, a kiss, an 'I love only you,' an apology, a chance to trust again...you. I want you.

But let's get over that, shall we?

What do I intend to do now? Walk away. Leave you with her. Go on with life. Realize that in the long run, I'm worth ten of her. And a thousand of you.

So goodbye, Draco Malfoy. Enjoy your life with Pansy. And while I know I'll live without you...I hope you can live with yourself.