Hunting For The Sun

CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE

The Baltic

It was a long journey. I can´t remember precisely how long, but we were aboard the ship for an attenuated time. I stopped counting before the first week was out. My only saving thought was that the vampires couldn´t follow me here. They had no idea where I was going, and only Skye could guess. There wasn´t much shade, and three of them couldn´t convince the people to get them a ship...

But they could probably Apparate ahead of me. They could even fly to catch up. The only thing I had to save me was the sun. I slept with a stake in my fist and spent all day up on deck.

It was a tanker, though, and not really made for passengers. I suppose it was all they had. All the metal was going into the war-effort. They only had these old ships to keep the world running. Crates and storage units took up most of the deck. The cabins were shared and very basic. Beyond basic, really, but I hadn´t exactly paid for comfort and luxury. It was serviceable, no more.

The ship´s funnel boomed, and I left my little pillar and my people watching. I joined the roughly garbed group of travellers who ascended the ramp and filed onto the ship. We were directed down under the deck to the cabins where we bagged the ones we wanted. I believe I shared with a Norwegian girl who spoke in her sleep and snored and tossed and turned all night, but at least I wasn´t alone. She looked as though she could hold her own in a fight, so I was glad to have her there. I couldn´t get over the size of this ship. I had been on small river tankers and coasters, but never one like this. I think it was delivering precious gems to the countries bordering the Baltic. It was also fairly likely to be illegal, but who was I to comment?

After dumping my minimal possessions on the bunk bed in my little box of a cabin, I went straight up to the deck. I assumed my position at the rail as the massive thing moved ponderously out of the dock and into the sea. There was a great churning, and steam billowed out of the chimneys. The funnel roared and we picked up speed. The wind began to run its fingers through my hair, growing and growing. Shouts of `Forty knots and over!´ criss-crossed the deck from rail to rail, and sailors ran about with bags full of coal. I turned and leaned my elbows on the rail with its chipped white paint to watch the bustle.

I found myself a way to climb up the crates and sit on the roof of the driver´s room, right under the funnels. It was a great place and had a wonderful view. It got pretty cold, though, and I was almost grateful when a bell tolled sharply and I slipped down to go for lunch.

It was no more than gruel, but I really enjoyed the atmosphere. For once, the fact that no one was talking to me was good, and I could listen to everyone else instead. There was a fierce, red-bearded Scotsman wearing overalls talking to a thin man with thick glasses next to me. I homed in on their conversation.

`So you´re in the gem trade?´ the red-bearded man asked.

`Well, some might call it that,´ the thin man evaded.

`I´m in the ship´s crew,´ the other man said, ignoring the hostile reaction and digging into his gruel.

`Oh?´ the thin one asked, trying to look interested, when actually he looked like he was about to be sick.

`Yeah,´ the redhead snorted. `We don´t get paid anything.´ His eyes took on a hungry look. `I bet you get loads of money in gems.´

`Well, it´s overrated,´ the skinny one replied, sliding a finger around his collar to loosen it.

`Yeah, and I love being in engine-room crew,´ he snorted.

~*~

But on the second day of travel, it rained. The storm lashed the windows of the common room and the ship rocked like a rubber ducky in a flushed toilet. The lightning staggered across the sky like legs of fire, drawing ever nearer. The great engines pounded under us, creaking and tearing in protest. Many of my companions spent this time with a bucket between their knees, but strangely, it didn´t bother me. I sat reading a book as the ship plunged and rose.

Someone else who was doing alright turned his attention to a small battery radio which was bolted to the table. A wheezing, humming crackle filled the room and blurred voices began to surface.

`Let´s hear the news!´ someone called out to him. He nodded and twiddled the dial. A voice became clearer and clearer, almost as though it was rising to the top of a lake or something. Finally it broke out into the slightly muffled voice of some posh-sounding radio-broadcaster.

`Announcements have been made today of a new law restricting the Baltic gem trade.´

Several people swore noisily and ran out of the room. `The London Chancellor will make statements concerning the state of truce with the Rebel Factions of England. He is expected to denounce the latest claims of the Ministry responsibility for the death of the Rebel leader Harry James Potter last year. However, this could well be a rumour. Osme Salime will appear before public in London Parliament Square later on today to face down a rally of opposition to the latest command issued: that Rae Kelwaedd is to be killed on sight. We have been asked to issue the following statement, in Osme Salime´s own words. "She is a threat to the people, and has connections with the Rebels. Regardless of what she has done for the Cause, she is an abomination in the eyes of the Ministry. She must be killed." Later this morning...´

I ceased to listen to the rest of the broadcast. I had forgotten totally about the various prices on my head over the last few months, since Draco died. What if someone recognised me? My first urge was to run off quickly, but that would be conspicuous. I had to trust my experience with this one. Running off only makes things worse.

So I buried my head I my book, flicking my eyes over the pages but not really reading anything. I listened as hard as I could to what people were saying, checking if any of it was about me.

`However did that Salime bloke get in charge of the whole empire? He´s an idiot!´

`I don´t like all this. I think the war´s going to start any day now...´

`It´s all so complicated. Why can´t the Rebels just surrender?´

`My dog could do a better job than Salime. At least he could sniff out one adolescent girl! She can´t be that hard to find. There´s almost no way that she could have left the country!´

That was the one to listen to.

`Oh I quite agree. Frankly, I don´t care whether they catch her or not, but it´s inconceivable that Salime should waste all his time on this one girl. I mean, what did she actually do?´

`Oh I know. Yes, there´s nothing to really convict her. She´s a murderer. Standard procedure for those is trial and execution, not kill on sight. They don´t usually care if they find them.´

`No, no they don´t. The only important one she killed was Draco Malfoy. I can´t say I´m happy about that. He was a good, sensible leader. Not like Salime.´

`Yes, but did you hear? About a month later they were seeing him and Kelwaedd all over the place. I think he´s alive. I think it was all just a hoax.´

`But they had a confession from Kelwaedd, a sort of "ha. I killed your leader".´

`That could be faked.´

`Oh easily, but who knows, is what I´m trying to say. It could be any number of things.´

`You´re right there.´

`But they´re saying at the Ministry that she killed Potter too.´

`Good riddance, I say. He was just stirring them all up. I´m even starting to like this girl. She´s done a good job.´

`Yeah, I´ll be happiest when she gets Salime.´

Well, that could be arranged.

I wasn´t too worried after that. We didn´t appear to have any Osme-sympathisers on board. I settled back down again and listened out for the next broadcast, curious as to my celebrity, and how unhealthy it was getting to be me.

Darling?

Draco?

I just thought you´d like to know. We´re back at the Temple and Alethea´s in stasis. She should be alright, but we need to find a cure. We´ve got a load of minions scouring the library.

Good. Let me know if you find anything,

I said.

Will do.

I returned my attention to the radio as the caster cracked and wheezed his way through another notice.

`Oh! This just in!´

he cried. `Important broadcast, please, everyone listen.´

We all exchanged hurried glances and crossed the room to kneel in a semicircle around the radio.

`Today, in the House Of Lords at eleven am Greenwich Mean Time, the Ministry had a Rebel ambassador executed on the spot. Hogwarts has made a declaration on the fourth code of conduct, as agreed at the end of the Great War eleven years previously. Citizens of the Empire, we are now at war with the Rebels.´

There was a shocked silence.

`The declaration of war was issued just an hour ago at Hogwarts and spread to London. The Rebels have stated that they have formulated an army and are fully armed. They suggest surrender. Osme Salime issued this statement: "We will crush them to the ground. They cannot hold against us. They say they have an army, but they cannot hold against the might of the Empire."

`However, he seems unaware of the diminishing volume of support. Recent figures suggest that the Rebels and the Empire have even numbers, roughly. The amount of neutrals, however, far surpasses either force. I believe this war will go to stalemate, but who is to decide that?

`Apologies for being the giver of this news. It is not a good time, and we suggest that you spend the last few days before conscription with your family and friends.´

Everyone looked utterly terrified. I didn´t feel anything. I knew this was coming. It had to come. That was the point. My prophecy was something to do with this war and I didn´t plan on being reluctant at this stage.

Draco.

Yes dear?

They´ve declared war upon each other.

Already?

So it would appear.

How did you hear about that?

We´ve got a radio working. They said that the numbers are fairly even.

They probably are.

What do you think?

I´m not allowed to join in. Nor are you. Nor are Alethea, Cloud, Skye, Raven, Ori, Persephone or the other three.

Three?

We don´t know them yet, but we need your opposite, my opposite and Alethea and Cloud´s opposite.

That´s four.

No, Alethea and Cloud have the same person.

Why?

Oh, don´t ask. It´s too complicated.

Huh.

I smiled.

See you soon.

I nodded and turned my attention back to the now-babbling group.

Okay. So war. War in the Empire. Just what I needed. All it did was bring the reality of what I might have to do closer to home. I still had no idea, and apparently it had to stay that way regardless. Draco knew. He just wasn´t telling me. He knew precisely what was in store for me, and the thought grated at my soul. Basically, I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. I couldn´t move either way, for fear of destroying something or everything. I couldn´t run away, and I couldn´t try to get it all over with quickly. That´s bloody unfair, to say the least. I could only do what I was doing: picking my way across Northern Europe to try to get home for my dying friend and to stay away from my allies.

That was also quite scary. I remembered somebody once telling me that the Death Eaters enlisted the aid of non-humans like werewolves and vampires. The strength and power of just one vampire was scary enough. A whole army of bloodsuckers didn´t appeal to me at all.

But I wasn´t to take sides. I mustn´t, I thought. I had to stay neutral or this thing would never be healed. But that´s the hardest thing in the world. When you think about it, it feels really relieving not to have to feel the plight of either team, so to speak. But when you put it into practice, you realise how hard it is not to want someone to win. You always either agree or disagree with someone, and you want the ones with whom you agree to win big. It´s human nature, isn´t it?

But I was scared. I´ll freely admit that. I was terrified, shaking in my boots type scared. Skye was formidable enough, but then I had two superhuman monsters out after me as well. Then the entire Empire was on `reward for clubbing her to the ground´ alert, no matter what they thought. On top of that, the war had started, and I was essentially an enemy to both sides. Great move.

I was less likely to be an enemy to the rebels, but I still killed their leader. I´ve since decided that I was probably intended to kill Potter. I was made to kill him, partly, but also what he had done to the world.

And as I stared out of the tiny, thick paned window at the rain and the ocean lashing over the deck and great waves billowing in the tearing wind, I realised something. Baddies want to - supposedly - make things worse, and goodies - supposedly - want to make things better. They both want to change things. Change is something that just happens. We class it as better or worse. But also, opinions vary. As I would support one team, others would support the other. Baddies aren´t making things worse, they´re making things better in their eyes. Goodies are making things worse in the baddies´ eyes. That would make the goodies baddies and the baddies goodies, but at the same time, from the other side of the fence, goodies are goodies and baddies are baddies, but if one is a baddie then surely one wouldn´t regard oneself as a baddie, one would think one was a goodie. That´s why it´s only really `them and us´.

So it´s not really `beauty is in the eye of the beholder´, it´s `baddie is in the eye of the beholder´. Think about it.

But what shapes our opinions? Other people. We hear things that we like and we say `Hey! So-and-so´s right! I agree!´ But without them, we would never formulate anything new. So that leaves us with the basic case that good and evil are conceptions. No one really knows what they stand for. Most of the evil people in history were nutters anyway, and therefore excused. We all sit around saying `well it´s alright for yooooouu´ when actually no one takes the time to listen to a word anyone else says.

Well, I suppose that goes back a long time. All the little tribes mistrusted each other, and all taught their children that the other clan was evil, and never to talk to them. We just do things that way, I suppose. What gets me is that people changed that. I´m not saying that I wanted to go back to primal fear of difference, but it worked. That way, we all hated each other but no one was really big enough to hurt the other without another war starting.

This is all just my take on it. You don´t have to listen if you disagree.

There we go again.

But do you basically see what I´m getting at? It´s a long hard slog, and I´m sure that most of you will think that this is evil and blasphemous, but I don´t care, because it isn´t evil to me. Do you follow? It´s good to me because it´s thought and intelligence, and that´s usually good. It´s quite complex, and I shocked myself when I thought of it, but it started to make a lot more sense. Really. Just give it time.

While I watched from the tiny, grimy window with its flecks of black around the edges and condensation between the glass, the rain slackened and broke off to a light drizzle, then faded away entirely. The wind blew the clouds away and then, in turn, it died down. The sea returned to a rolling canter and the sky was blue. The sun was a white disk some child had stuck to the blue paper sky and everything was calm.

But it wasn´t. War had been declared and we were back again. Why does life always do this to me? Why does everything I do have to be tainted by stupidity of others as they blunder along. I´m the sellotape of the universe. Her and me. We go and fix all the messes you make and put it back with shiny tape and glue marks. You don´t know we´re doing it, and you never will. That´s kind of part of my inspiration to write this. We stick all the things you break. You never thank us. You thank God or Lady Luck or something, but never us. You don´t even know we´re here. That can get pretty depressing after a while. I´m sure you can imagine.

So I want to teach you a little lesson. Those of you who were alive during the wars will remember. Those of you who knew what it was like. You know what I mean. You know what we did. Those of you who were born since or were too young to remember, you will hopefully never know how bad things got. You won´t have to see your whole world fall apart in front of your very eyes.

You´re lucky.