Time After Time

She stormed out of the Great hall, walking away from what was supposed to be one of the happiest nights of a girl's life; her prom. She reached the doors to the entrance, tears rolling down her face. She couldn't believe he'd even tried to cover it up by telling her something different instead. He lied to me again.

She threw open the doors to find it was raining heavily but walked outside anyway, not caring about the weather.

As she stood there crying, the rain got heavier, seeming to echo her mood as her own heart also grew heavier the longer she stood there thinking about what was happening.

She was soaked to the skin and shivering from the cold but she didn't care. Her hair was no longer in perfect curls but looked wet and bedraggled and her dress was ruined yet still she did not care. The only thing she cared about at the minute was inside the hall, still at the dance, and he had just blatantly lied to her.

She walked into the Great Hall a little late as it had taken a huge amount of persuasion on Lily's half to get her to go on her own. A few people turned to look at her as she walked in. She looked stunning. Her shoulder length, dark chestnut-brown hair was curly in contrast to its natural straightness and her glasses had been exchanged for contact lenses. She was wearing a little enhancing makeup and her dress robes were pale blue, contrasting magnificently with her hair.

Remus had looked up when she walked in and his breath caught in his throat. She looks so beautiful, he thought. She doesn't even look as if she cares anymore. He stood up slowly and Hayley watched him approach from the other side of the hall. She had come here in hope of an apology, and the truth, but whether she would get it, she did not know.

When he reached her he stood in silence for a while, they had not talked properly for some time and it was hard to know where to begin. "I...you look..." He sighed. Words could not describe how she looked, or how he was feeling. "Would you like to dance?" he asked quietly, scared she would not accept his offer. "I think we need to talk. We haven't been doing much of it lately."

Hayley nodded and together, they silently walked over to the dance floor, not quite touching, but when the music slowed, he had no choice but to take her in his arms. It was that or watch her walk out of his life, and he had a feeling that if he let her walk away, she wouldn't be coming back.

He pulled her into him, never wanting to let her go, and yet still found himself unable to tell her what he was. He did not want to lose her; he simply could not bring himself to hurt her.

She felt his heart racing in his chest and looked up at him questioningly. He smiled slightly and began to speak quietly of what she thought would be the truth. "I'm sorry I haven't told you sooner, but I will now. You know I trust you, and I'm sorry it's made things so difficult, but I didn't want you to get upset." He took a deep breath, "My Grandmother, she's been ill-" Hayley cut him off. She stumbled backwards a few steps. Worried, Remus asked, "Hayley, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," she retorted. "Nothing at all. I don't know why I even tried again. I should have known there was no point in it," she added more quietly, almost to herself. With that, she had turned and walked away, slowly at first, but beginning to get more upset and angry, her pace increased until she was almost running away from him. She did not think she would ever want to go back.

She grew angrier and sank to the floor with tears streaming down her face as the weight of her sadness pressed down upon her.

"I can't believe I even thought he was going to tell me the truth," she whispered, angry with herself. "I can't believe I let him get to me like this. Why won't he just trust me?" she questioned.

She was sat on the ground getting wetter when a shadow fell over her and wondering whom it was she stood up and whirled around ready to confront whoever it was. As she did so she began, "If you've come to laugh you can piss off!" she muttered furiously, expecting to see some Slytherin or other standing behind her.

He almost wanted to laugh for it was not very often she swore, but the seriousness of the situation weighed down upon him and he stayed silent, stood there. She had stopped in her tracks when she saw who it was.

She felt her heart skip a beat at the sight of him. There he was, stood in front of her, tall and dripping wet from the rain, with water falling from his sandy, brown hair and running down onto his face. The one person she had not expected to follow her out here, yet the one person that could stop the pain she was feeling.

But he had hurt her enough already. I'm sick of his lies, she thought, and made to leave. She had heard enough tonight already, but as she walked quickly past him he caught her wrist and whirled her around to face him once again.

"Hayley, please? At least hear me out."

She tried to pull her arm out of his grasp but his grip was tight and he would not let her leave. I'm not letting her walk out on me again, he assured himself.

"Remus, you've had more than enough opportunities to tell me what happened, but you either lie or don't speak at all. I appreciate the fact that you don't have to tell me everything, but you clearly don't trust me. I don't have important secrets to share with you and I can't see a way of showing you that you can trust me. Why can't you see that you have to, of your own accord?"

"Hayley, it's not about trust, its just that-" He sighed sadly. "My God. Everything was so perfect before and now I've ruined it."

"It was?" she asked. "Perfect, I mean."

He hesitated, staring at her through the rain. "Wasn't it? I kind of thought it was," he answered, not sure if he should be going down this road at such a time. There were so many ways in which this could go wrong.

For a moment she could feel herself wavering and she could see how easy it would be for things to fall back to the way they were; him missing half the time, with no explanation as to why, but she could not allow that to happen. There were some things that just had to be said.

"Remus?"

He looked up to meet her gaze but did not say anything.

"Where do you disappear to every month?"

"Hayley, you know I can't tell you. I wish I could, its just that-" She cut him off.

She ploughed on regardless. "Why is it that once a month you appear to be so ill you can hardly stand and have hardly the energy to do anything?"

He simply looked down at his feet, no longer having the courage to meet her gaze. He was scared about what he might see in her eyes. "Its... I don't know. It's just complicated."

"It's obviously not that complicated. You've told everyone but me," she snapped back, clearly getting angrier at his refusal to share his problems.

He winced and it was clear that he did not think she had realised everyone else knew what was wrong.

"Not everyone knows, Hayley," he tried to assure her.

"Anyone of any importance then, including Snape, and yet you won't tell me," she retorted, hurt.

"There are things in my life... It's hard for me." He shook his head resignedly, "You wouldn't understand."

"Remus, you haven't even given me a chance," she spluttered exasperatedly.

"I can't tell you Hayley, you have to face it. I just can't."

He had been cruel and he knew it. He instantly regretted what he had said. He began to apologise but stopped as he saw her expression. He had pushed her too hard.

A look of disgust had fallen across her face and she pulled her arm out of his grasp. She had forgotten he was still holding her wrist, it had seemed such a familiar gesture that she had quickly overlooked it, but now the sting of his touch made her wrench her arm free of his grasp and that more than anything else was what made him want to tell her. The fact that she could no longer bear his touch was too much for him. He looked down at her and knew what he was going to say. His mind felt the clearest it had in a long time.

"I'm a werewolf," he said quietly and looked away from her, not wanting to see the disgust he had seen taint her face only seconds before. She could see it was costing him dearly to tell her this.

"Remus I know. I've known for a while," she whispered, tears still rolling down her face. A look of confusion fell across his face, which he covered quickly in hope she hadn't seen but he was not so lucky.

"Oh come on Remus. Don't underestimate me. I'm perfectly capable of working it out. It wasn't exactly hard with your monthly disappearances." She spoke furiously. She had hit him hard and she could tell.

"I think I suspected that you did, but didn't want to admit it, the chance that it might drive you away scared the life out of me. How long have you known? And why didn't you say anything?" he asked gently, still not meeting her eye.

"I didn't say anything because I needed you to tell me yourself, Remus, to know you could trust me, with anything. I realised what was going on the morning after the full moon in February," she paused and looked at Remus as comprehension dawned on his face.

"The day we stopped speaking. You asked..." He shook his head at his own stupidity. "It was the first time you ever asked where I'd been. I thought you didn't even realise."

"How could I not notice that you go missing once a month? Along with the form your Boggart took in Defence Against the Dark Arts, it wasn't hard to put two and two together when I thought about it. I'm not stupid, Remus," she added before continuing. "I waited and waited for you to tell me, for you to trust me, but weeks went by and you didn't say anything." She was still crying and furiously brushed the tears away but still they fell. Her face was wet from the rain and she hoped he couldn't tell she was crying as they stood there with it falling around them.

"We weren't even talking," he put in delicately.

"Only because I knew you'd lied to me. I'm not deaf though, you could still have told me if you had wanted to." She was unbelievably angry with him now. "I thought that you'd tell me when you were ready, but you didn't. You carried on as if I was worth nothing to you. I couldn't see why you wouldn't trust me. Then finally I thought you were going to tell me tonight, but you lied again Remus. You stood there and lied to me again. And now I'm not sure whether I can trust you anymore. What's more, you clearly don't know me that well at all if you think I would have walked away from you, from us, simply because you change into a wolf once a month."

He turned away. He hadn't realised what he had cost her until now. Her trust had meant everything to him and the fact that he had abused it riddled him with guilt.

But she was right of course, and now he realised how foolish he had been in keeping it from her. In thinking that lying would ever have been safer than the truth. Yet here they were with, what was without a doubt, more problems than before.

He started walking towards the door but turned sharply back to face her half way to the Entrance Hall. He would apologise then leave her alone. That way he would not cause her any more pain.

"God, Hayley, I've been so stupid and I can only apologise, but you should know it was never about trust, I'd trust you with my life. I didn't want to hurt you, though I've managed to do that anyway. For what it's worth, I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say. If I'd realised sooner how much I was hurting you already, the things I'd have done differently. You should know that it's been hell without you these past few weeks." He started to walk towards the doors again. "Goodbye Hayley. I suppose I'll see you around.

"Remus, I ... you seemed to have been doing fine to me."

This slight hesitation was all the indication he needed. Maybe there was still a chance that she would forgive him. He turned around and started walking purposefully back towards her.

"I wasn't, it was tearing me up inside and I tried not to let it show, but anyone close to me could see how I was feeling. I couldn't concentrate on anything," he answered passionately. This is my last chance.

Hayley looked down at her feet. "Remus, I'm..."

"Don't even think about apologising. You did nothing wrong."

The gap between them had closed and as he took another step towards her she became painfully aware of the small distance that lay between them. They were nearly touching now and her stomach flipped. She suddenly realised what she must look like having been stood out in the pouring rain, blushed and went to take a step back but he put his arm out towards her waist to keep her stood near him. "I'm sorry I lied, and I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner." His breath tickled her neck and she shivered.

He looked down at her and this time she met his eyes and up close she could see the difference in him. His face seemed slightly drawn and there were more lines around his eyes and she realised what she had cost him.

Tears were still rolling down her face and Remus wiped them away gently with his thumbs, but didn't remove his hands from her face. When she did not move away from his touch he leant down and kissed her slowly, deeply. She was hesitant at first but slowly leant into his familiar embrace and kissed him back, taking in his familiar scent and silently thanking heaven that he was back. She had missed him.

He pulled away from her and calmly looked down into her eyes. "I'm sorry," he said again. He had missed her too. "You're freezing," he stated, aware that they had been stood out in the rain for some time and that she was only wearing her dress. "Come back inside?" he asked, but Hayley could hear the hidden question is his voice. Do you forgive me? was what he had really wanted to say.

She inclined her head slightly and he took this as acceptance of his apology. He knew that everything would be all right again. He took her hand and she leant slightly against his body for comfort, quickly accustoming herself once more to the familiar shape of his body. He led her back inside. They were together again, as though they had never been apart. The fact that he had come so close to loosing her scared him and he realised how lucky he was to have been forgiven, how lucky he was to have her at all. He squeezed her hand tightly as though to reassure himself that she was really his. She looked up at him and smiled. His heart danced and his stomach flipped with love and the knowledge that everything was back to how it was meant to be.

He would never let her go again.