Sinking Into Darkness

Sinking Into Darkness

"There was one quest left for me: destroy Voldemort. I didn't care what would happen after that. He and his death eaters had killed everyone I had ever loved, except Sirius. That's because as long as Sirius was alive, the minister would continue to blame the attacks on him. I once loved a boy called Draco Malfoy[NULL] but they killed him when they took him into their ranks. Now he is just a soulless body walking around carrying out his master's wishes.

"After I found out about this I stayed locked up in my room for days on end. Only Hermione knew about my feelings for Draco. I couldn't tell Ron, because he would ridicule me for it. It was during the summer that it happened, so Hermione came over, broke down the door, gave my relatives the money to fix it and walked into my room. She gave me quite a tongue lashing. I hope I'll never have to experience that again. She ended up convincing me that it was Draco's own fault, and that I shouldn't make a mountain out of a molehill. Then she gave my relatives a sweet smile, and went back home. Typical Hermione, right?

"I had just found a way to solve all my problems: the dark arts. They helped me release all those pent up feelings. Besides, it's best to attack fire with fire. I would beat them with their own weapons. The only question is was how to defeat Voldemort. I decided that I'd just have to begin researching. I didn't care whether it was white or black magic that I used as long as I destroyed Voldemort. Destroying him was what I lived for. I absolutely hated him, and still. I remembered something from a movie called Star Wars that was one of the very few things I was able to watch as a child. 'Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering.' I disregarded it, thinking that it was only true for the movie; that it didn't mean that it was that way in real life.

"I got the books on the dark arts under a disguise. On the Hogwarts Express I charmed them so that they look like normal books. I didn't want anyone to know what I'm doing. There might have be spies or imposters that report to Voldemort. No, it was best to keep it a secret. I didn't realize then that that was the worst mistake: not telling Dumbledore or anyone else. I might not have ended up how I am now then.

"Unbeknownst to me the hate was eating at my very soul. If things were to continue like that, I would someday become like Voldemort. But luckily, Hermione found out. She had been getting worried about me, since I spent so much time studying. She brought me straight to Dumbledore and told him what she had found out. He asked me if this were true and I nodded.

"It was pretty scary sitting there, wondering what would happen to me. I was surprised when I felt Dumbledore take my hand. I felt his energy doing a scan on me. When he was finished, he opened his eyes. I don't remember noticing when he closed them though. He told me that if I had come any later I would have been consumed by darkness. As it was he still could only stop me from falling deeper.

"He started telling me good things that Tom Riddle had done. Talked about how the new first year Slytherins were always helped by him. How he had comforted the students when a family member died during the second world war. Tom had once been a good boy. But his hate towards the murderers back then tarnished his heart and soul. It was ripped to shreds. After he went through that torment he still pretended to keep his old part, but in reality it was just a shell. It wasn't really Tom Riddle anymore. It was then he had opened the chamber, and started on his way to becoming Voldemort. Voldemort was no longer a human. In a way, Voldemort was just an evil creature created out of the hate of one man, who was then taken over by it. He told me that what my aim should be, was to set the trapped soul free of the cage that had once been it's home. Then he told me that in a way I was already evil, but not quite evil enough to go overboard like Voldemort.

"The silence was so deep you could have heard a pin drop. Hermione was the first one to come out of her stupor and she said, 'Supercalafragelisticexbealidous.' That snapped me our of my stupor too, and sent me into fits of laughter. Dumbledore, being from a wizard family, looked at us quizzically. I was so busy with laughing that Hermione had to explain it to him. 'That's a word you say when you can't think of what to say. It comes from the muggle movie Marry Poppins.' With this info Dumbledore also cracked up.

"When we got our composure together again, Dumbledore offered to teach me the right techniques to destroy Voldemort. I hastily agreed, because I didn't want to become like Voldemort.

"A year or two later I finally defeated Voldemort. But I didn't do it in cold blood. I even bade him good-bye. Draco also came out of a trance. It was then I found out that he had been resisting to the end, until he was put under the Imperius curse. Unlike Harry he couldn't resist it. He admitted that he loved me. By then the magical world held too many bad memories for him, so we went away. We moved to America, and built a nice little home up in Alaska. We took you kids with, because you were also orphaned in the war. Draco wanted to do anything he could to recompense what he had done when under the Imperius curse.

"Now off to bed children. Tomorrow you've got school. It's already past your bedtime."

I watch them leave. Now Draco and I can have a little privacy. I am a little tense from having to relieve the whole tale again. But it's the children's favorite. I can't help it that I melt every time one of them gives me those puppy eyes. I feel arms surround me in a gentle embrace. I know that they're Draco's, and I start to relax. He releases me, and I turn around to see him. He gives me a gentle kiss, and leads me up to our bedroom. This is by far the nicest part of retelling the story. It reminds us of our love, and how much we need each other.

I know that if I look in the mirror of Eirsed now I'd only see what is really there. Why wish for something impossible? I'm content as long as I've got the kids, Draco, and an occasional letter and visit from my old friends.

THE END