I Can't Help Remembering You

No longer mourn for me when I am dead

Than you shall hear the sultry sullen bell

Give warning to the world that I am fled

From this vile world, with vilest worms to dwell:

Nay, if you read this line, remember not

The hand that writ it; for I love you so

That I in your sweet thoughts would be forgot

If thinking on me then should make you woe.

O, if, I say, you look upon this verse

When I perhaps compounded am with clay,

Do not so much as my poor name rehearse,

But let your love even with my life decay,

Lest the wise world should look into your moan

And mock you with me after I am gone.

-William Shakespeare, Sonnet LXXI

I stare at the ground that holds you.

And I think of your life.

And though I promised not to, I think of your death.

I can't help it, Harry. I must think of you. And I must think of all of your life.

I must think of you because you are a part of me.

You know that, don't you? You know I love you, you know I must remember you.

I'm not brooding over you, Harry. But I can't forget you. You know that, don't you?

I think of your life. How you smiled, and how I met you, and how you saved my life thousands and thousands of times.

And I think of your death, Harry. You should not have died. You died saving me. You shouldn't have. Harry, couldn't you see that if you didn't live, I couldn't?

And yet I must. I must go through the rest of my life knowing that you will never be there, knowing that I will never again see your smile, never again see you laughing, never again feel your lips on mine...

How can I live like that, Harry? How can I live?

And yet I must live, Harry. I must live, for Ron and for Ginny and all the Weasleys, who loved you like your family and yet who still do not know how I feel. You didn't die for them, it isn't their fault that you're dead...

I'm being selfish, Harry.

I know you told me not to cry over you, to forget you if I couldn't live with your memory haunting me. But Harry, I wouldn't live if I forgot you. I must remember you.

Hermione, you know that they want to kill me.

Please, Harry...

No, this is important. They are going to try to hurt me through you, you understand? And I can't let them do that.

Harry, are you...

I'm not leaving, Hermione. I couldn't if I wanted to, even though I should. But promise me, Hermione, that you won't put yourself into danger.

You're one to talk.

I mean it, Hermione.

I promise, Harry. But you promise that you won't either.

I promise that I'll try not to. And Hermione?

Yes?

There's one more thing. If I die, you've got to promise me that, if you can't stop thinking of me, if you can't go on with your life because of me, you've got to promise that you will forget me. I don't want you to brood over me, Hermione. I want you to enjoy your life.

I couldn't forget you, Harry. You know I couldn't...

You've got to promise, Hermione.

I promise to try. But, Harry, I don't know if I'll be able to.

I wasn't able to, Harry. You can't expect me to forget you. I can't.

And Viviane. I have to remember you for her. She must know she had a father. She was born after you died.

You'll never know her, never see how much she looks like you already, never see her life.

Are you watching me, Harry? Are you watching her?

If you are, I hope you know how much I love you.