The Child's Memory

Five o'clock rolls around all too soon. Remus Lupin stops, waits, and breathes until he hears her voice, his Tonks' sweet voice, in the hall. "Hello, Love? I'm home!"

He does not immediately go to her, as he usually does. Instead, he plans what he is going to say to this wonderful woman, the love of his life. It takes him a minute, he counts to three, and then goes into the room. "Hello, Love... Sit down. I need to talk to you."

She cannot believe it. It really did happen, she thinks, coming into the sitting room and settling herself into one of the squashy black chairs, trying to put the thought out of her mind.

He opens his mouth and she bites her lip, preparing herself for the words she does not want to hear. "Nymphadora," he begins slowly, nearing tears. "Nymphadora, I must tell you something. I understand this will be hard for you; it isn't exactly easy for me either. But do you remember when I used to come on Saturdays to baby sit for you?" She nods, trying not to blank this out, trying to focus on what her love is saying. She does not need to hear it, however. She already knows.

After he finishes, voice cracking and tears brimming, she gets up, quietly, and leaves the house.

Tears do not set in until she is out of the house. She is unsure of where she will go from here but she knows one thing: she cannot stay. She cannot stay in the same house is that monster, the monster who she thought she knew, thought she trusted. The monster that called itself Remus.

She is in her house. It is 2 days after her sixth birthday party. Another Saturday. Remus is there, isn't he? Of course he is. Her mummy and daddy have gone out.

"Reeeee-mussss, where are you? Where're you hiding? REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMUUSS! Come out now!"

They are playing Hide-And-Go-Seek. It is post-touches, also post-bath. Two hours before bedtime. She is it, and Remus is a very good hider.

"Okay, Remus... Okay, I give up. Please come out now." It has suddenly become scary. She has been looking for Remus for over ten minutes.

"Remus, I surrender. Remus!!!" No answer. She begins to cry, heavy, wet tears, and checks for his shoes at the front door. They are there. Maybe he was aducted by aliens and they left his shoes. "REEEEEEMUUUUSSSS I WANT MY MUMMY AND MY DADDY! I WANT MY MUMMY AND MY DADDY!" She hears some laughter, and pauses. "AND THERE'S A GHOST IN THIS VEWWY HOUSE AND YOU AWEN'T HEWE TO SAAAAAAAAAAAAAVE ME!! I'M GONNA DIEEEEEE AND IT'S ALL CUZ OF YOU NOT COMING OUT!!"

There is a deep breath heard. "Ooookaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay, little Nymphie. Are you suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure you give up looooooooooooooooooking for me?"

"Remus! Where are you?" Everything is okay. He just likes to challenge her.

"Youuuuuuu have to find me!" he yells, ghost-style, jumping out from behind the couch. "BOO!!!! It is I, the ghost of Remus... Here to frighten little girls named Nymphadora!"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!!" she howls, stamping her feet, angry to be frightened by something not threatening at all. "I'M ANGRY AT YOU, REMUS!! I'M TELLING MY MUMMY AND MY DADDY THAT YOU PRETENDED TO BE A GHOST! I'M TELLING THAT YOU DIDN'T COME OUT WHEN I SAID THAT I SURRENDERED! YOU'RE A STUPID BABYSITTER AND I HATE YOU!!" with that, she collapses on the floor, kicking and screaming and causing such a ruckus that she begins to hiccup and finally throw up, it is at this point that she stops screaming and looks at what she has done in utter shock. "You won't tell, will you, Remus? I don't really hate you... You're my favourite person. I was just scared cuz you went away and I couldn't find you."

Remus smiles. "I know I got carried away. I'm sorry."

"Carried away?" she asks, brow furrowed. 'Carried away' sounds like he was picked up and carried off like a baby.

"It means I was having fun and I forgot you may get scared," he explains. "Okay, Nymphie-Dory-Boo... Time for bed." He scoops her up, grinning and tickling her and laughing.

"Remus," she manages through gasps and giggles, "Remus, I don't like the nickname Nymphie-Dory-Boo, okay?"

He smiles at her as he is tucking her in. "Okay, Dora. Good night baby, I love you."

"I love you too, Remus..." she whispers sleepily, falling asleep.