Pausing For Effect

Word came two hours later. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley had contacted Dumbledore and all but demanded that Harry and Hermione be brought to St. Mungo's immediately. That urgency frightened Harry. It could mean that there wasn't much time...

Still exhausted after the days events, Harry dressed in muggle clothing and went downstairs into the common room. There he found Professor McGonagall and a paralyzed Hermione waiting for him. They were escorted to Professor Dumbledore's office. After being informed that Tonks would meet them at the other end, Harry and Hermione traveled by portkey to the alley behind Purge and Dowse, Ltd. They circled the building with the young Auror and, after speaking to the mannequin in the front window, entered St. Mungo's Hospital. The Welcome Witch directed them to the fourth floor Critical Ward. The three of them traveled up the stairs as quickly as they could without running. They arrived at the doors to the Critical Ward to find a sign reading, "No Entry Without Permission". Knowing they were stuck until someone arrived to escort them in, the pair took seats opposite the door and began the wait. Tonks informed them that she would wait in the alley and retreated down the staircase.

It was only after several agonizing minutes that a puffy-eyed Mrs. Weasley emerged through the doors of the ward. She managed a weak smile through the weariness in her face. Harry and Hermione converged on her in a hug that squeezed tears from all three of them. The trio stood there for what seemed an eternity. Finally, Mrs. Weasley broke away and spoke.

"Listen very carefully to me, both of you. What you are going to see in there is not going to be pleasant. You need to understand that. However, I want you to keep one thing in mind when you're in there, especially you, Hermione. What my son is going through is not your fault. The only one to blame in this is that dreadful Malfoy. No matter what comes of this, you're not to go blaming yourselves."

Harry and Hermione looked at each other, both knowing that this warning couldn't mean good things.

"Now," Mrs. Weasley continued. "Hold on to each other. You're going to need it. No one else is in there and the healers know you're coming. I don't know if he can hear you, but don't be afraid to talk to him. I'm going to go for a walk...clear my head." With that, she left Harry and Hermione alone, wiping her eyes as she went.

The two of them looked at each other silently for a moment before clasping hands. Then, after both had taken a preparatory breath, they pushed open the double doors to the ward and entered.

The doors hadn't even closed when they heard it. It was like no sound either of them had ever heard. A coarse, raspy gurgling was coming form behind the screens surrounding the first bed to the left as they two entered the ward. Harry and Hermione stood just beyond the entrance unsure of what to do. A healer, in lime-green robes, motioned them over and introduced himself.

"I'm Zechariahs Gray, the healer in charge." He shook hands with the two of them before continuing. "I want you to know that we're doing everything we can for Ron. I'm sure you'll understand that we can only allow you in for a few minutes. We still have a lot of work to do." Harry and Hermione nodded their understanding and, with a last glance at each other, entered the area where their friend lay.

Nothing on earth could have prepared them for what they saw next. Harry felt his lungs implode with the shock of seeing Ron for the first time. He was lying on his back, the bottom half of his body covered with a sheet. His chest had been wrapped in bandages, through which the dual wounds of Malfoy's spell had bled through. The skin that was visible had a waxy, yellowish-white hue to it. There were red patches on his cheeks and his forehead was dripping with sweat. But it was Ron's breathing that held Harry's attention. It was coming in rapid, painful gurgles. Droplets of scarlet blood were visible on his lips and chin. His eyes were half-open but unseeing. Harry had seen eyes like that before. He'd seen them in a graveyard almost two years ago. "Cedric," Harry whispered. Quickly realizing that he'd said the name aloud he turned to offer Hermione an apology.

She was standing next to him, nearly doubled-over. Both hands were clasped to her mouth and nose, stifling her silent scream. Hot tears coursed freely down her face, burning trails in her cheeks. She spoke no words, made no sound. It was all she could do to keep herself standing. Try as she may, Hermione found that she could not move. She stood, straining under the weight of anguish, powerless to tear her eyes away from Ron's.

Harry tried to help Hermione stand but she only sunk closer to the floor. In the end, aided by the healer, he carried her from the room and out of the ward. Hermione leaned on Harry almost completely until they were outside the hospital and back in the alley. It was in that alley that the gathering storm inside Hermione Granger broke. A strangled, broken cry snaked its way from the very pit of her soul and drove her to her knees. Hermione's small frame was mercilessly wracked as wave upon wave of scorching tears poured ceaselessly. Once again, all that Harry could do was hold Hermione and let the tempest inside her rage. Very late that night, after they had been returned to Hogwarts, she found temporary solace in the same sleeping potion Dumbledore had given Harry the night Voldemort had returned.

It took three days for Ron's condition to stabilize. Although the healers were relieved that he had made it this far, Ron had still not regained consciousness. No one knew for sure when, or even if, he ever would. It was a full two weeks later before Hermione could bring herself to ask Dumbledore to allow her to visit Ron again. He had given Harry permission to go and see Ron on weekends, under supervision from members of the Order. He'd even managed a trip to the Burrow to see Ginny, who was keeping up her studies from home. She tried to seem in good spirits but Harry knew she was suffering as much as Hermione. Harry left that night feeling very guilty that he hadn't been able to do more for her.

Hermione rose early on that Saturday, almost three weeks after Ron's attack. She dressed carefully in the only muggle dress she had with her at school and took extra time brushing her hair. She was determined to be strong for Ron today. She was determined to tell him how she felt, whether he could respond or not. She adjusted the straps on her dress, a rather plain blue one with a tie in the back, and left the dormitory. When she reached the bottom of the staircase, Harry caught her eye and approached her.

"Do you want me to go with you?" he asked

"No," she replied. "I'll be all right. Ron's better now and the initial shock has worn off. I just want to spend a little while with him...alone."

Harry smiled and hugged Hermione. "Good for you. Tell him hello from me."

"I will. And thank you Harry, for everything."

An hour later, Hermione stood in front of the entrance to the new ward that Ron had been placed in. She needed no escort to visit here but she still hesitated before entering. After steeling herself for what possibly lay ahead, she pushed the door open and walked in.

To Hermione's relief, there was an abiding sense of calm in the room. The smell of fresh flowers hung lightly in the air. The witch behind the desk at the end of the ward smiled pleasantly at beckoned Hermione over. She showed her where Ron's bed was and then brought screens to assure their privacy. After ensuring there was nothing else Hermione needed, the witch left her alone with Ron.

She was pleased to see how well he looked since last she'd seen him. The bandages had been removed to reveal two thin scars across his chest. They seemed to Hermione to be healing well. Despite the fact that he looked noticeably thinner, Ron's color had returned. His breathing was rhythmic and even. He looked peaceful.

Hermione sat down in a chair next to the bed and watched him for several long minutes. She eventually reached out and tentatively took his hand in hers. It was warm but otherwise lifeless. Hermione raised his hand to her lips and allowed them to brush softly across his fingers. She closed her eyes and drank in the sensation of his skin on hers. After an unknown eternity, she spoke.

"I came here to tell you something, Ron Weasley." She whispered. "I came here to tell you that despite all of your best efforts, I still somehow managed to fall in love with you. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about you. I've forgotten the number of times that I secretly wished that you would stop my harping on you by kissing me. I know you think I get angry at you a lot. And I must admit that there have been times I could have hexed you to the moon. But, Ron the thing that makes me angriest...and saddest, is this idea that you have that you are unworthy of love somehow. You constantly compare yourself to your brothers or to Harry and think that you don't measure up. Well, Ron Weasley, I am here to tell you that I happen to think you measure up just fine."

Hermione kissed Ron's hand one last time and held it as she stood and turned to leave.

"Not so fast," the whisper came.

Hermione gasped and looked to see Ron's tired eyes staring straight back into her own.

"I guess you've figured out by now that I love you," Ron said. "So I guess when I get out of here, we have a few things to talk about eh?"

Hermione returned to her seat, never taking her eyes off Ron's. "I thought..." she began. "I thought you'd left us for good."

"No," Ron replied as he closed his eyes and smiled weakly. "No, I was just sort of...pausing for effect."