Not That Easy

NOT THAT EASY

You. You were a friend. You were a friend of mine I let you spend the night

You see how it was my fault. Of course it was mine.

She set out on a quest for him, burning with anger and confusion. Running from the library, her safe haven until this point, all the way to Gryffindor Tower where she was positive she could find him. Rational thinking wasn't with her as it normally was, but a turn of events had given the young woman a different perspective. Not necessarily the right one, but a different one nonetheless.

Slamming the portrait open after giving the password, she scanned the Common Room until she saw his head peak over the top of an overstuffed chair in front of the fire. Walking over to the chair, she noticed the young man was asleep with an open book in his lap; a book she'd given him for Christmas. Tapping his shoulder, she woke him with only a slight feeling of guilt. The first thing the young man noticed when he woke up was tears running down his best friend's face. They exchanged a few words as his hand reached up to wipe the tears sliding down her face. Her hand reached up to grab his and their eyes locked. Running her hand cautiously down his arm, she put her hand on his neck as his breathing became shallower.

The kiss was surprising and sweet. It started out innocent enough, as most things do. But this simple kiss escalated quickly between two best friends. And as the fire died down, they decided, both of them running high on emotions and mixed feelings, that it would be wise to find somewhere else more comfortable.

* * *

The sunlight slid slowly in the large glass window, illuminating chosen objects in the Gryffindor Boys' Dormitory while others remained hidden in the shadows. Thick drapery enclosed the bed, but sunlight managed to make its way through a small parting by the bedpost. The girl stirred slightly in her deep sleep, but remained unconscious to the world. The boy next to her propped his head on his hand, watching the way she slept. With a sigh, he kissed her bare shoulder and quietly slid out of bed. It's better if I leave before she wakes, he reasoned with himself, running a hand through his disheveled hair. With that thought in mind, he quietly dressed and left the dorm.

Hermione Granger awoke fifteen minutes later, feeling dazed and confused. She wasn't in her own bed; that much was clear. But as she looked around and soaked in her surroundings, the events of the previous night came screaming back to her. Sitting up, she pulled the covers to her chest and felt completely vulnerable and alone. Looking to her left side, she felt small in the bed that had been shared by two people the night before.

Who am I to say this situation isn't great? It's my job to make the most of it

Of course I didn't know that it would happen to me. Not that easy.

Sitting in Potions, Hermione felt him staring at the back of her head as the Gryffindors and the Slytherins sat through another excruciating Potions lesson. Class dragged on for what felt like an eternity and flashbacks of last night kept Hermione completely unaware of the lesson.

A letter from Viktor Krum had arrived yesterday, ending their relationship for good. The constant jealous bickering had indicated to Hermione that it looked like saving the relationship seemed like a lost cause. She still felt hurt and angry when Viktor wrote that he'd met someone else and he knew that deep down, she could never return the affection he felt for her. As bullheaded and jealous Viktor had been, he was Hermione's first real relationship and she had cared for him deeply.

However, his constant accusations and jumping to conclusions were something she wasn't going to miss. Putting the letter down, Hermione wondered if he'd been right; maybe she had loved someone else this whole time and by dating Viktor, she'd be able to forget about the other man. But the "other man" had been one of her nearest and dearest friends and the thought of a relationship with him was enough to make her laugh.

Still as anger and hurt feelings had boiled up inside her, she felt she owed it to herself to find out if maybe he'd been right. What had started out as proving Viktor wrong, Hermione found herself getting caught up in something bigger than it should've been.

"MS. GRANGER!" Snape's irritated voice brought Hermione back to reality and was aware of the stares and snickers she was receiving. "30 points from Gryffindor for not responding when I called on you at least three times. I will not condone daydreaming in my class, Ms. Granger."

She didn't even get a chance to respond to the ruthless point taking. Snape waved his hand and dismissed the class with disgust in his voice. Feeling slightly embarrassed, Hermione gathered up her supplies and books. After stuffing the last book into her overstuffed bag, she turned to see him leaning against the doorway, arms crossed and a smile stretched across his face.

"Ready to go?"

"Yes, I'm coming." She quickly caught up with him and the two of them began to make their way out of the dungeon.

"We need to talk." Her voice sounded confident, but her insides were shaking like jelly. She hated feeling like such a cliché, but she awaited for his response anyway.

"Okay," was his winning reply. "After dinner? In the Common Room?"

"What about the library? The Common Room will be too noisy."

"Whatever you want."

They continued to walk in silence, each lost deep in thought.

"So I'll see you later," he told her as they arrived to Hermione's Arithmancy class. Before she could respond, he leaned down to kiss her cheek. Smiling, he walked away to meet up with Dean & Seamus for Divination while she stood there feeling more confused than ever.

Hey what's that you say? You're not blaming me for anything that's great

But I don't break that easy. Does it fade away?

So that's why I'm apologizing now for telling you I thought that we could make it

I just don't get enough to believe that we've both changed.

Hermione sat in the back of the library in a big cushy chair, waiting. Dinner had been torture; she couldn't make eye contact with him and kept herself busy by stuffing her dinner down quickly. Unfortunately this resulted in a stomachache that she was hoping would go away soon. It kept her mind slightly preoccupied until she saw him spot her from the library entrance. Closing her eyes, Hermione tried to block out the images and feelings from last night.

"Hermione." She heard him say her name and opened her eyes to see him standing in front of her in all his glory.

"Hello...Ron," she heard herself reply back and forced a smile as he sat down in the chair next to her.

"So...what did you want to talk about?" This was so typical of him. As much as she wanted to, she refrained from rolling her eyes.

"Last night," Hermione started. "Listen, I just felt like I had to explain myself because now we're in this odd place and it's been driving me insane all day."

"Hermione, you don't have to explain anything," Ron said softly. "If anything, I should be the one apologizing."

"Why?"

"You were obviously upset last night. I mean, I know you said everything was all right, but I still feel guilty..."

"Ron, don't."

"Don't what?"

"Don't feel guilty," Hermione explained, sighing. "We slept together last night." An uncomfortable silence came between them. "There, it's out in the open. But I don't blame you for anything. I shouldn't have...it's just that last night I was so angry and upset with Viktor..."

"Did you guys break up or something?" Realization dawned on him as she nodded her head. "So what was I, some sort of back up? The fall guy?"

"No!" Hermione exclaimed loudly, receiving stares from students trying to study. She rolled her eyes and lowered her voice. "No, that's not what I meant at all. This is going to sound really stupid but..."

"But..."

"I thought maybe we were supposed to be together," Hermione admitted softly, pushing a piece of hair out of her face. Ron sat there with a slightly bewildered look on his face. "All these arguments with Viktor got to me and I thought maybe he was right, maybe I really did like you and I owed it to myself to find out. Of course, it certainly went a lot farther than I intended..." She noticed a guilty look creeping into Ron's face again. "Ron, I'm not blaming you for last night. It was just a mistake that got out of hand."

"Oh. Yeah...a mistake," he answered. He let out a large sigh and fell back noisily into his chair. Another silence fell between them as they looked everywhere but at each other. After about a minute or so, Ron looked up to see Hermione standing up and gathering her bookbag. "Where are you going?"

"Over on the other side," she replied. "I don't know if there's anything more we need to discuss. I explained my part of what happened last night. You clearly believe it's a mistake the way your face keeps getting red. Look, it's happening again!" Ron's face immediately grew warmer when she pointed it out, but he refused to respond. "Anyway, I have studying to do and I think I just need to be alone for awhile."

"Okay," Ron said numbly. Hermione spun on her heel and began to saunter off to the other side of the library. "Hermione!" He winced at the amount of stares and the disapproving look from Madam Pince he received. Standing up, he caught up with her and stood in front of Hermione. "Are we going to be okay?"

"I hope so," she replied quietly and wistfully, brushing a piece of hair out of her eyes. "It's just going to take some...time, that's all. And maybe..."

"Maybe what?"

"Maybe we shouldn't tell Harry. For now at least."

Ron looked into her eyes and saw a weakness in there he hadn't noticed before. Nodding slowly, she smiled back at him and brushed past him to set up a study area at an empty table. Taking the hint, Ron began to make his way toward the library exit. Thoughts swam through his mind, muddled and vague as he tried to sort them out. One thing was clear though; the best thing that had ever happened in his life was deemed a mistake by a person he cared very deeply for. Pushing the door open, he walked out into the empty hallway and knew that it would take more than time to get over this "mistake".

Well neither one of us deserves the blame because opportunities moved us away. And it's not an easy thing to learn to play a game that's made for two that's you and me the rules remain a mystery.

See it can be easy.

CREDIT: The song used in this fic was Absolutely Zero by Jason Mraz.