World on Fire

World on Fire

I walked into the Great Hall. My feet led me to the Slytherin table, the table I knew very well. In my childhood I sat at this table, and watched him. Now he is sitting with his lover. His lover isn't me. I don't know if he ever realized I loved him back.

I didn't have the best ways of showing my love. That could have been what ruined our relationship. We had fought, yes indeed, and our relationship was far from perfect, but it never lacked in passion. It was hard. So many times we argued over foolish things, and we forgot all the good things about being together.

I still have trouble believing we are over. I sometimes walk home, the house we used to share and I call out his name to the silence. Of course I remember he is gone, it's just out of habit. Or maybe it's just wishful thinking on my part. Most likely it's the latter.

* * * * *

"God dammit! Will you ever grow up, Draco?" Harry screamed at me.

I shrugged and looked at him with a disinterested expression on my face. "Why should I?"

Harry growled at me, grabbing me by the collar. The Great Hall was silent, watching us fight. The Daily Prophet wrote constantly about our 'abusive' and 'destructive' relationship in its gossip pages. Whenever we went out, people would watch us, and we knew, we just knew, that they were making bets about how long we would stay together.

I looked at him emotionlessly as he began to yell at me. I just looked away, sighing. It hurt, yes, it did. Of course I would never let him see it, though. I didn't want him to know that he was my weakness, that I could never truly deny him anything. Then he would know he could hurt me. I glanced at Harry during his tirade, my eyes narrowing. He was going off on this and that. I was getting pissed.

"Bloody hell! It's over! It's fucking over, I don't want to have to deal with you anymore!" I stood up and was now panting after yelling, looking at his eyes, which now were wide with shock. They soon narrowed, full of anger and hurt. I knew Harry was going to back down now. But that's exactly what he didn't do, I soon realized.

"Fine, I have wanted to break up for months. Good riddance!" Harry yelled back, before storming out of the Great Hall. His friends glared at me, and I was once again walking to the Slytherin table. I stood there, my face blank, my legs unwilling to walk.

* * * * *

Sitting on the sidelines at our class reunion, I sighed and watched as Harry and his lover-of-the-day Matt coddled each other. Harry was smiling sweetly at Matt, his eyes softening a little, mocking how he used to look at me.

It should be me, dammit, me! He glanced at me and frowned, looking away quickly. I looked away, staring into space, my face betraying no emotion.

I didn't speak to anyone. I didn't care if this was some fifth year reunion. I didn't give a shit. I only came for him; I wanted to see him again, to have his presence in my life for a few days, if only from a distance.

Matt leaned down and kissed his lips, looking at him with lust in his eyes. I watch silently as Harry blushed and kissed him back. I looked up at Dumbledore as he stood up and cleared his throat. Matt groaned at the interruption, but Harry shushed him.

"Welcome back students and dear friends. It seems as though it has been many years since the Leaving Feast. You have all grown up into wonderful and responsible adults. I could not be more proud of you all. Now I know you have heard enough of me and I will leave you to the feast."

At the mention of the Leaving Feast, many eyes darted my way. I made sure my face looked frozen and that I looked heartless.

Harry must never know that I care... no, I will not go there.

I watched him and Matt stand up and excuse themselves politely. My stomach felt queasy. He is going to fuck my Harry! I had to catch myself, as I was about to stand up and stop them. I must stop thinking like this, he isn't mine!

When they left, I stood up and walked toward the other set of doors, wanting to be alone. I hoped no one had noticed me, but I know they must have been staring at me. I took a deep breath of relief as I left the Great Hall and walked down the hallway, making for the guest quarters.

I turned a corner and looked up to see Matt, who was kissing Harry deeply, their tongues visibly entwining. I felt my heart drop and I cleared my throat, trying to ignore the pain, and of course to stop the sight before my eyes.

"Excuse me for interrupting, but your rooms are nearby and some of us don't want to see your sickening display." I sneered.

They parted, flushed, and looked at me. Harry's eyes widened.

"Draco?" He said softly.

"Hmm, you remember my name, I'm surprised. Though, of course, I am the only one who wasn't one of your infamous one-night stands," I replied disdainfully.

Harry took a small step back, his eyes burning with fury.

"Well, you are still the same asshole I remember. I can never forget heartless bastards and of course you are the worst of them," the Gryffindor retorted.

Matt slowly backed away, looking embarrassed. "I'm gonna go, maybe we'll meet some other time." He turned and practically ran down the hall.

"Matt, wait!" Harry cried, but Matt didn't stop. I smirked at Harry, as he looked disappointed.

I looked at him with mock sympathy. "Aww, will poor Harry not get a fuck tonight?"

"You just have to ruin everything, don't you? You must find some sick pleasure in torturing me," he snarled, his fists clenched at his sides. He glared at me with his green eyes, no longer covered with glasses, flashing angrily.

I walked over to him silently, looking into his eyes. He backed away, till he reached the wall. I smirked bitterly, and reached down to his fist and unclenched it. He looked at me, frowning, but his face was soon red. He looked so damn adorable.

I leaned down and his eyes flew open as he swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing. I watched his pink tongue dart out and wet his bottom lip. I stared at his lips as I drew closer to him. I moved to the side of his face just in time. I can't believe I almost kissed him.

I put my lips close to his ear and whispered lowly, "I believe you enjoy my torture."

He pushed me away, angry, and stormed off. When he passed me, I watched him leave, frowning.

I walked to my room and entered it. I pointed my wand at the fire and whispered the words that lit it. I kicked off my shoes and walked to the bed, lying down.

It had been so long since I had had anyone in my bed. I never knew how lonely it was to be alone. I miss having him in my arms. While he was going from man to man, I never took anyone. I couldn't bear to touch, let alone kiss, anyone that wasn't Harry.

I got under the covers, pulled a pillow to my chest, and closed my eyes. I imagined Harry in my arms, that I still was holding him every night. I felt tears come into my eyes. Five years had passed and I still couldn't get over him, even though I knew he had gotten over me long ago.

Tears leaked out of my tightly closed eyes. I remembered that day. The day I was going to propose to him. I had gone with Hermione, who was and still is a close friend, to the chagrin of Harry. She was the only who knew of my plans. She and I picked out rings and she helped me decorate my room. I would have led him there after the Leaving Feast. I had planned to ask him for his hand in marriage and then we would have made love.

Harry had been annoyed with me about something, I still can't remember, probably something stupid. I thought if I had threatened to break up with him, he would have calmed down. He didn't, of course, and we broke up. I took it in stride and kept my cool and collected appearance, while my heart was breaking inside. It was the hardest thing I have ever done, but I walked away from him. I returned the rings, and cleaned my room.

Sighing, I opened my eyes and gasped as I saw Hermione standing there, watching me silently. I looked away, hiding my tears, even though I knew she had seen them.

"Hey, Hermione, what are you doing?" I asked, sitting up.

She sighed and looked at me sadly. "Why don't you tell him?"

I looked away and shake my head. "You know I can't. It's not possible."

She walked over to me and grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at her. "I remember, as I know you do, that day. I remember the light in your eyes as you were planning how to propose to him. You loved him, don't deny it, and you still love him. I don't know if he loves you still, but you must tell him."

"He has gotten over me and it's obvious he doesn't want my love anymore. I would give anything, anything, to have him back. He doesn't want me, though, so I will leave him be."

"Draco Malfoy! You are the only man he has ever truly loved! If you don't go now, he will waste his life away on one-night stands. You will cause him more pain that way. He wants someone to love him. You are the only one I know who loves him for the person he really is, not the 'Savior of the Wizarding World'. Please just tell him, the most he can do is tell you to bugger off."

I looked at her and then averted my gaze. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a black box. I frowned and took it, opening it, curious. I gasped and looked up at her. It contained the rings. I ran my finger along the edge of one of the intricately etched rings.

"Where did you find these?" I whispered in awe.

She smiled her secret 'I know something you don't' smile, and I knew she wouldn't tell. I bit my lip, running her words over in my head.

"Do you really think I should do this, Hermione?" I asked softly.

She nodded. "I do."

I sighed and stood up. "Then I guess I should."

She smiled and hugged me, whispering encouragement in my ear. She rested her head on top of mine and I was still shorter than her. She ruffled my hair as I rolled my eyes and walked toward the door.

"Good luck," she said.

"I'll need it," I replied bitterly.

I walked down the hall to where I knew he was staying and knocked on the door. I waited for a few minutes and knocked again. I couldn't hear any noise from inside, so I turned to leave, convinced he was gone. The door opened and I started. He glared at me and was shutting the door when I stepped into the gap, pushing it back open.

He glared at me, shaking his head as he rolled his eyes.

"What do you want now, Draco?" he asked in a bored tone.

I smiled at him, which I could tell took him aback. "Just for you to accompany me down to the lake. I hear it is quite lovely this time of the year."

Harry looked at me suspiciously, before shrugging and walking back to grab his jacket.

He followed me silently. We walked out of the building. It wasn't as uncomfortable walking with him as I had imagined it would be. I felt an inner peace I hadn't felt in a long time and I loved being near him again. I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye, trying to judge his emotions.

We reached the lake quickly and I sat down on a bench, motioning for Harry to do the same. I looked at him, and he frowned, looking at me strangely, like he was trying to read me. I took a deep breath and blinked slowly, letting my mask of indifference fall, letting him see the pain engraved on my face and in my eyes. He gasped and looked away quickly. I sighed, trying to ignore the fluttering in my stomach, trying to find the courage to follow through with my plan.

I swallowed, my fingers trembling as I pulled out the box holding the rings. I opened the box slowly, and set it down between us. He looked at me incredulously for a moment before looking at them. He looked at the box, different unnamed emotions flashing through his emerald eyes.

I spoke, "I bought these seventh year." He started at my voice. "You see, I was in love with a wonderful man. I was going to propose, you know, but we got in a silly argument, like we did a lot of times. This wonderful man was very angry with me and I thought I would calm him down by threatening to break up with him, but it backfired, and we broke up. I-" I stopped there, looking down at my lap, avoiding his gaze. I stood up, pacing away from him, trying to relax. "I still love him, deeply, and I want to ask him if he would ever take me back. I am coward, he told me this many times, and I have wanted to say this for so long, but I just now was able to tell him." I gathered up my courage and turned back around to face him.

I froze, seeing tears streaming down Harry's cheeks. I reached up to brush them away, but my hand faltered and I dropped it back down to my side. His eyes burned with what I believed to be anger. I choked down my tears, though I'm sure some made their way into my eyes. I picked up the box containing the rings and closed it.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bother you or anger you. I'll go."

I stood up, but a hand stopped me as it grabbed onto my forearm, and I turned. Suddenly, arms were around me and I was being kissed eagerly. The box slipped out of my fingers, as my grip loosened in shock. I felt his lips as they hungrily devoured my own and I shook my head, clearing my thoughts. I finally began to kiss back.

It was like finally getting something you have wanted for years, like a rainstorm in the desert, rare and cherished. I realized how much I had missed his soft lips, especially when they were pressed against my own. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I kissed him deeply, our tongues melding together. I moaned into the kiss, trying to drink him in. We kissed a while longer before he ran out of breath. He pulled away, panting. I looked up into his eyes. I know I was crying.

My knees collapsed and I fell, well I almost fell, except a pair of strong arms caught me. I buried my face in his chest and cried against his strong body. Finally I felt happy, I was at peace. In his arms every worry I might have once had disappeared. He pulled away and looked at me, his eyes searching my own.

"We argue so much and we don't really get along, Draco, it could be a mistake," he whispered.

"Don't you remember the good times? Don't you remember when we made love, or when we would sit on the couch, holding each other and just talking?" I pleaded softly.

A small, bittersweet smile formed on his lips and he nodded.

I looked at him fiercely. "I love you, Harry, and this time I won't let you go because of some silly fight! I want to keep you and love you forever."

He looked down at me and smiled, his eyes softening with love. "Same here. You don't know how much I have missed you, Draco."

I smiled at him and he pulled me into his arms. "I think I know just how you feel." I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him into another kiss. A gentle, warm kiss, that was brief, but beautiful. I felt my heart racing as he bent down and picked up the ring box I had dropped. He got down on one knee and looked up at me.

I looked down at him, my eyes wide, as he spoke softly. His voice shook with emotion as he pulled out a ring and took my hand is his own.

"Will you be with me forever, Draco?" I nodded and got down on my knees before him as he slipped the ring onto my finger.

Smiling, I placed the other ring on his finger. "Of course, Harry."

He smiled and hugged me tightly. We knelt there, just looking at each other, tracing memorized features once more with our eyes. After a while I stood up, pulling him up with me. I took his hand and laced our fingers together.

"Come on, want to go and sit on the sofa like old times?" I asked.

He nodded and we began to walk back to the castle. He squeezed my hand. He then snorted, smiling. "Sirius and Remus are gonna have a fit."

I raised an eyebrow at him, questioning, as we walked back to the castle. We walked slowly, relishing the fact we were back together. I was also still in shock and I felt my legs trembling.

"They are lovers, you know," Harry supplied, looking sideways at me, grinning.

"No, I didn't," I answered, smiling in return.

I had missed that grin. I opened the portrait to my room and went inside with him. I took his coat and shrugged out of my own. I pulled him to my living room, and we curled up on the couch before the fire.

The fire shone brightly, casting shadows on us, as we lay sat together on the couch. The warm glow was nothing compared to the warmth of Harry's arms, though.

Harry wrapped his arms around me and I snuggled against his chest, sighing contentedly. I realized how much I missed this feeling. Merlin, did I thank Hermione. I yawned and wrapped my arms tightly around his body, never wanting to let go again. Exhausted, I soon feel asleep in his embrace.

~ Fin ~