Mindgames

Chapter 3 -- Selene

Harry looked in question at Professor McGonagall. "Wife? Sister?" Harry guessed, trying to imagine Snape having either.

"Sister, if you must know," McGonagall said from her seat beside the bed. She crossed her legs and arms in a standoffish manner.

"What happened with her?"

"Mind your own business, Harry," she said.

"Excuse me," Harry said in a bit of a singsong and waved his hand at her. "I am the one in the middle here where he doesn't want to be. It would help me a lot to know what is going on."

McGonagall straightened more and stared at Harry. "Selene was taken prisoner by Voldemort seventeen years ago, to force Professor Snape to remain a Death Eater. Does that satisfy your curiosity?"

"Yes," Harry said. "At least it helps me know what not to say to Professor Snape."

"Smart boy," she commented.

Harry frowned and pulled his knees against himself and hugged them. He wished he were someone else and then decided that was a dangerous attitude and blanked his mind again.

Later that morning, Dumbledore stopped by. "How are you doing?"

Harry held up his hand and rocked it in the air to indicate middling.

"Well, maybe I'll take you to lunch with everyone and we'll see how it goes from there."

McGonagall gave the headmaster a doubtful look. He waved her down. "Professor Snape has filled me in on your last few hours, Harry. Do not assume I am making this decision without information. Harry blushed fiercely, causing McGonagall to look between them in curiosity.

"You need a nice normal day, Harry. I think it would be a grave error to keep you in here dwelling upon your dilemma." Harry stood up as Dumbledore teleported his robes and his clothes to the desk in much neater piles then Harry ever put them into his trunk. "Whatever you do, Harry, do not worry. The staff are all quite aware of the situation. The danger you represent is really not very great, especially since I am holding your wand for you. Also I think since nighttime seems a little worse, we shall keep you here under watch during that time."

Harry looked up at him and nodded. It made him feel a little better, though he wondered how he was going to do classes. Don't worry, he reminded himself.

"Minerva, take Harry to the staff washroom to change and clean up for class." She nodded and led Harry out.

The hallway was just emptying of students between classes. Harry hesitated in the doorway. McGonagall caught on and waited with him until the area was clear. Harry felt strange enough padding around in his pyjamas in an empty corridor let alone one full of students.

McGonagall sat on the bench just inside the bathroom door and looked at her nails while Harry hurried through getting showered and changed. He felt a lot better when he was done, more human. She stood up and looked him over. "That really is the permanent state of your hair, isn't it?"

"You don't know the half of it. My Aunt Petunia tried to cut it once: badly and real short. This was before I knew I was a wizard. It grew back overnight, exactly the same."

"I would just surrender to it then, Harry. It becomes you, I think." Harry gave her a crooked grin and shook his head. "Good to see you smile, Harry," she said and led the way out.

They returned to the spare office, now completely re-conjured as a mini-common room with small sofas and a low table with candles, teapot and magazines. "Dumbledore changed it around," Harry said, appreciating greatly that the room no longer brought back bad memories quite so quickly.

They sat drinking tea and flipping through old rumpled issues of Witch's Weekly until lunchtime. Harry's heart pounded as McGonagall led him to the Great Hall. Harry imagined everyone would turn to him as they entered. A few students did but as everyone was getting seated anyway their entrance mostly just blended in.

Harry stood next to Ron until his friend noticed. "Harry!" Ron exclaimed quietly. "Have a seat." Ron glanced at McGonagall and she nodded and went up to the head table. Hermione came over looking long in the face. She glanced up as she stepped over the bench and froze when she saw Harry.

"Hi," Harry said to her.

"Harry, how are you?" she asked and then flinched as though she was not following some instruction she had been given.

"If they told you to behave normally then that would be a very normal question from you," Harry teased her. "I know you are sorry and it's in the past, so forget it. After what has been happening it seems like really distant past."

"Are you better?" Ron asked. Hermione shot him a look of warning at that. Food appeared in front of everyone.

"At the moment," Harry said and grabbed a roll and a large blob of butter on a knife. He had missed breakfast and his stomach felt like it was going to implode. Between bites, Harry said. "It's all right. All I ask is if I close my eyes and ignore you for minutes at a time, please don't disturb me."

"Sure, Harry. That's easy." Ron said.

Harry could read Hermione's face. She wanted to take it all back and she felt guilty as hell about everything. "Hermione, if you don't knock it off I am going to be forced to throw rolls at you."

Her face went alarmed and then she laughed. "I missed you, Harry. It is really boring around here without you."

"What am I, chopped dragon liver?" Ron asked with his face full of roast.

"I wish I could tell you what has been going on." Harry really did wish that.

"Why don't you?" Ron asked after a big swallow.

Harry resisted glancing up at the staff table. He tried not to think of this as a test but it really was. "Well, you know how it started." Ron nodded. Harry assumed Hermione had been filled in. "It hasn't gone away completely," Harry said, closing his eyes to check his wall.

"Ah, like that," Ron said when Harry reopened his eyes.

Harry nodded. "Yeah, like that. Anyway. I've been under watch. Mostly Snape."

Ron shivered violently.

"Ron, he got me out of that state you found me in. He knows what he's doing." Harry said in a low tone. Ron shut up. "Except Voldemort has been trying to torment him through me so it isn't the greatest because of that." They sat in silence listening raptly, barely chewing.

"Hermione," Harry said to his friend across the table. "What you thought happened--Voldemort took me over and tried to make it happen."

Her face fell into a stark horror before she came back to herself and swallowed hard as though her throat were suddenly much smaller than expected. Harry felt so much better for having shared that, though, he was glad he did.

"What am I missing?" Ron asked.

"What did Snape do?" Hermione asked, unable to control her curiosity.

"In a minute, Ron." Harry said to the side. "He was actually really calm and cool about it. Thank Merlin the man is completely unshakable." Although, Harry remembered the sister and thought that maybe that wasn't really true.

Harry saw Ginny watching him with a strained expression. He gave her a weak smile and returned to Ron's confused face. "Ron, you really don't want to know. You'll puke up your lunch and then later, just for the heck of it, dinner too."

Ron stared at his plate. "Yeah, you're right--I don't want to know."

Ginny put her hand on her cheek and stared at Harry before looking away. She pushed her plate back and stared at it.

Lunch ended and the head table filed out. Harry watched them all leave and looked around at his friends with a smile. "I think we have class," Harry said.

Ron patted Harry on the back and they all stood up. As they headed back to the the common room, Ginny tugged on Harry's sleeve.

"Can I talk to you a minute. Uh, alone," she added.

Hermione grabbed Ron and walked to the end of the corridor and stopped. Ron was a little put out by this but followed Hermione down the hallway. Harry watched them with a little smile and then looked down at Ginny. "I think I followed what you were saying in there." She said. Harry shrugged that was okay.

"You are as so much better at handling this. You asked Ron for help as soon as you got into trouble. If I had done that. . ."

Harry cut her off by raising his hand. "Ginny. Do you know how many times I've nearly killed myself before learning that? More than once, I assure you."

"You actually remember what happens when he takes you over?"

"He wants me to. And this is not quite the same Voldemort."

"I can't tell you how much better you are making me feel. I thought I was just too weak to resist."

"Ginny, I am finding out strength has nothing to do with it. It is how confident you feel in yourself."

"If there is anything I can do for you, Harry. . . I can't believe how brave you seem."

Harry grabbed her arms in his hands. "Ginny, I am scared to death. But I don't have any choice but to keep going. Don't let regret drag you down; it will destroy you from the inside out."

She swallowed hard and looked at him with shining eyes.

"You know there is something you can do for me."

"Anything."

"If you ever see me behaving in a way that makes you suspicious, and I think you know what that means, I want you to hit me with the strongest spell you know, without hesitation."

"Harry?"

"I am completely serious. If everyone knows that, it gives me a lot of leverage against him and it lets me relax a little."

"All right, I'll do that, Harry."

Harry released her. "Thank you."

Harry caught up with Ron and Hermione. He glanced back to make sure Ginny was out of range of hearing. "Let me guess, Ron. Every time Ginny has tried to talk about what happened with Tom Riddle's diary, your mum has freaked out?"

"Something like that," Ron admitted.

"She's needed someone to talk to," Harry commented. "She still feels guilty."

Ron frowned but didn't reply.

They had transfiguration that afternoon. Harry sat wandless, watching Ron and Hermione practice. McGonagall patted him on the shoulder twice as she walked up and down the aisle, which was a lot from her, much more like Trelawney. Harry thought about pointing out to her that she wasn't behaving normally but he found he really didn't mind the attention.

############

Harry had the headmaster as a watch that night. He sat in a large, overstuffed love seat squeezed in at the end of the bed. Harry wasn't given a potion that night so he slept rather roughly. When morning came Harry waited for the staff bathroom and had to hurry to get ready for breakfast.

In the middle of munching a nice crispy piece of toast, Harry overheard a Quidditch discussion from the Ravenclaw table. He looked at his friends, busily eating. "What happened at the match?" Harry asked.

They all froze. "Uh," Ron said, "Ginny got the snitch twenty-two minutes in. Two-ten to twenty. Three foul shots. Easy game really."

Harry considered that. "Good job, Ginny," he managed. He really had been looking forward to that match. Harry closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead.

"Uh, Harry?"

"You're interrupting me, Ron," Harry commented.

"Oh, yeah. Sorry."

They left him alone until he felt okay again and looked over at Hermione. She still had a pained expression. Harry shook his head at her. "I can't believe you thought. . ."

"But Harry you were always disappearing and you were always tired."

"Hermione!" Harry burst out, then started laughing. Ginny who today was sitting right next to Hermione was laughing as well after she elbowed the other girl hard in the arm.

"I can't believe you said that either," Ginny commented.

"Are we back on that other topic I don't want to know about?" Ron asked, concerned.

"Yes," they all said together and laughed more.

At the head table, McGonagall leaned over and caught the headmaster's attention. She gestured at the Gryffindor table with a nod. Dumbledore raised his chin and peered at the giggling students over his glasses. He gave the Transfiguration Professor a look of relief and turned back to his conversation with Professor Sprout.

############

In Potions that morning it was very clear that Snape was not himself. He was distracted and irritable in a completely different way. He moved things around with a deliberateness that seemed more like a house-elf than a professor.

The whole class caught on and didn't even talk, let alone misbehave, as instructions were given. As the students filed carefully over to get their ingredients Snape looked over at Harry. "If you need a break, Harry, let me know."

Everyone froze at that. The class had never heard the Potions professor use a student's first name, except as part of roll call at the beginning of the term. They all looked from Harry to the Professor. Harry nodded in reply and gave Hermione a look to hurry back with ingredients so they could start brewing and ignore the rest of the class.

Because Harry didn't have a wand, he was partnered, which no one else was. He liked working with Hermione though. She had the whole potion organized in her mind and her notes and nothing ever went wrong.

Halfway through, Snape made the rounds of the benches. Harry watched his odd movements as he walked around and looked things over. This Selene thing was really setting Snape off. Eventually, Snape stopped beside them. "Ms. Granger if I replaced the agar with pectin in his potion would it change anything?" Harry was grateful Snape hadn't asked him because he was starting to feel a little tired from sleeping poorly.

"It wouldn't change anything, I don't think," Hermione said. Snape raised his brow and walked to the next bench.

Harry felt dizzy for a moment and wondered if he was just suffering from the fumes. For no apparent reason he wondered idly what boar's fangs would do to the potion and thought he knew the answer as well. He closed his eyes for a long two minutes, but when he opened them, he didn't feel much better.

"Professor?" Harry said. Snape looked up at him. "What would happen if we added boar's fang to the potion?" Harry asked.

Snape stared at him. "It would become rather poisonous."

"Then I do need a break," Harry said tiredly.

Snape didn't even roll his eyes as Harry expected. Just swept over and led him out with a firm hand on his upper arm. Harry walked with his eyes closed until Snape stopped and said, "Steps," at the base of the stairs out of the dungeon.

Up in the main corridor Snape knocked on McGonagall's door as they went past then opened the spare office and pushed Harry inside. McGonagall looked out and saw her colleague standing in the doorway of the next office. "Can you stay with Potter? I need to return to my class."

She nodded and closed her door and came over. Harry sat on one of the small sofas and stared at the wall, biting his lips. Snape closed the door. Harry heard his footsteps receding. Fear had a grip on him again, he had to shake it loose or he was going to be lost.

McGonagall sat down on the other sofa and opened the book she had in her hand.

Harry felt he was losing ground. Hermione's notes from the last few days were rolled up on the table. Harry picked them up as though in a dream and scanned them. "The diffusion of the poison of the dart toad is such as to produce a numbness in its victim," Harry read at random on the top page. Since toads ate bugs, Harry wondered if that applied to them as well.

More ground was being lost, Harry sensed. He stared at the page and let the notes carry him into a kind of trance. He could feel the oddly gentle snaking in of another mind but held back from giving any indication he knew it was there. Harry's eyes narrowed and closed and he felt a small smile tug at his lips as he thought of something. He carefully built up just the sides of his chinese wall and then without warning drove his thoughts back through the middle and straight into the Dark Lord himself.

Outwardly, Harry revealed none of this, but inside he was screaming in a kind of victorious elation. He had taken Voldemort completely by surprise and held onto his advantage by plundering the other's mind in a wild rampage burning with his own long-pent up frustration. Thoughts, emotions, plans, strategies, all dark and sickly, scattered around Harry as he ripped in a wild spiral heading straight for the center. But like a Wronski Feint, he pulled up at the last moment and dived in another direction, leaving behind a trap that Voldemort had quickly set for him and giving Harry a few moments to look around.

Harry opened his eyes. His heart was pounding madly in his chest. McGonagall hadn't moved.

"Professor?" His very normal voice sounded completely out of place. When she looked up, he said, "Get Professor Snape. Quickly."

She tossed down her book and dashed out. Harry didn't know how much time he had. He hadn't understood much of what he had found but he had a distinct sense of the Dark Lord's urgency so time must be important.

Snape rushed in and grabbed Harry's shoulders and looked at him. Harry felt himself shaking with the knowledge of what he had just done. "Richenhill Ravine," Harry said. "There is a small stone shrine at the entrance to a cave."

Snape's face blanked out a moment and he stared at Harry as though seeing him for the first time. Harry tried to explain. "I went on the offensive and caught him off guard."

Snape released him and dashed from the room.

############

"The boy thinks he knows where she is," Snape said to Dumbledore as he cornered him in the corridor. Snape explained what had happened.

"I don't like Harry doing that, Severus."

"I did not suggest he do so," Snape came back defensively.

"I'll have Hagrid round up the Thestrals. Meet us on the front lawn."

Snape started to turn away then stopped. "Should we take the boy?"

"If he will come without a wand." Dumbledore sighed. "He may be useful as a touchstone."

Back in the spare office, Snape opened the door quickly and said, "Front lawn," to McGonagall and dashed off. McGonagall stepped out into the hall and caught Flitwick. "Take over watch here," she said.

"I have class now," Flitwick said pointing across the wide hall. Students milled about inside a room where he indicated.

"Hand it off," McGonagall insisted and left.

"Ms. Granger," Flitwick said. "Take the class."

"What?" she blurted, but he was walking away toward an office on the other side. Harry stood in the doorway. He gave Hermione a thumbs up and stepped inside with Flitwick. The door clicked closed.

Hermione stood in the middle of the wide hallway and walked slowly to the classroom. No one settled down as she stepped up to the desk at the front. "Hey!" she finally yelled. The class quieted much slower than they would have for a teacher. "Sit down," Hermione said firmly.

A knock on the window of the spare office brought Flitwick over. He unlatched the heavy-leaded sash and swung it out. McGonagall sat on a Thestral which hovered outside the window. Several other riderless ones hovered around her.

"Tell Potter he can come if he doesn't mind being without a wand."

Harry stuck his head out of the window as well. Low clouds roiled above although the day seemed bright to someone inside. "Of course!" Harry said. He leapt up to the window frame and without hesitating, out onto the back of a thestral that circled below the window.

"Professor Flitwick, please come as well, we need all of the help we can get!" Dumbledore said.

"I'll come down!" he shouted.

"Catch up then," the Headmaster said and the Thestrals surged away from the castle.

The Charms class gazed at Hermione but sat down and quieted. "Professor Flitwick just told me to take over the class," she explained.

"Seriously?"

"Yes, Ron," she snapped.

"Can you do today's charm?" someone asked.

"Yes."

"I don't want to do this joining charm, it seems dumb," someone else complained.

"It is on the syllabus," Hermione said as if that ended it.

"But it is never on the NEWTs," the same student pointed out. "We have midterms in two weeks, can we do a review session instead?"

"You would rather do that?" Hermione asked. Many heads nodded and students muttered about questions they had. "Well, sure we can do that." Hermione opened her bag and took out a thick roll of parchments.

"Is that your notes?" Someone asked, incredulous.

"Yes," Hermione replied as though she didn't understand the tone of voice.

"No wonder you always ace everything."

Hermione refrained from pointing out that anyone's notes could look that way. "Okay the first week we covered heating and cooling charms. Does anyone have any questions about that?"

Neville raised his hand timidly. When Hermione turned to him, he said, "I didn't understand what Flitwick kept saying about conduction and capacity. They seem the same in most charms."

############

Harry ducked low behind the neck of his mount and blanked his mind better than he ever had. He didn't want to give the enemy any warning at all, although surely they must know they were coming.

The Thestrals flew faster for Dumbledore than they had for Harry and his friends last year. Very soon, they were landing in a small clearing. Harry jumped down and looked around in surprise. "This is exactly the place," Harry commented, disturbed to find someplace he'd never been feel so familiar. Snape was already running into the small shrine, nearly ripping the door from its frame.

Harry's scar burned. He stepped over to McGonagall who stood in a dueling position, looking around them. "He's here," Harry said to her.

"Where?"

Harry grabbed her wand hand and tried to point with it. The target kept shifting in his mind. He let go. "Around, in those trees." We are sitting ducks, Harry thought and moved closer to his Professor.

"They must be cloaked then," McGonagall commented.

Harry could feel a trap falling closed around them like a noose tightening around his neck.

Dumbledore said, "I am going to give you all my vision on three." He spun around once and a shimmering transparent dome appeared around them. On it ghostlike was an exact overlay of the world except crouching cloaked figures huddled among the trees.

"Harry," Dumbledore shouted. Harry looked over and grabbed his wand from the Headmaster's outstretched hand. As he snatched it up, Harry was already casting the strongest spells he knew at the hazy figures in the projected woods. Where are you, you bastard? Harry said, scanning for Voldemort himself. He kept his mental wall up and hoped dearly that it would hold so he wouldn't become a weapon for the other side.

Harry glanced behind them and saw Snape run out of the shrine clutching something in his arm. He mounted a Thestral at a run and took off. Harry and the others moved to follow. Harry felt his wall blowing inward in a desperate attack from Voldemort. Harry screamed and tossed his wand at the Headmaster, hoping he would catch it. He was vaguely aware of Dumbledore turning to him as he cried out so he felt there was at least of chance of the wizard retrieving it.

Harry found himself aboard a Thestral. He crouched over with this head under one arm, the other tangled in the mane of the creature. He tossed every concern away from him and focused like an insane man only on the rhythm of the beast beneath him. By the time they reached Hogwarts, Harry felt he had left the Dark Lord behind again.

They landed on the roof of the hospital wing. As they dismounted and hurried inside, Harry realized that most everyone was injured. Flitwick had strange spikes sticking out of his forehead, McGonagall had a bloody nose and held one arm tightly against herself. Only Dumbledore seemed unscathed.

Harry thought maybe in the rush of battle he could have lost a limb and not realize it until later. He looked himself over and Pomfrey said to him, "Come in dear, we'll check you over after taking care of the most critical."

Harry sat on one of the beds and watched as Flitwick was spelled back to normal and McGonagall was given bone knitting potion and treatment. Harry grew bored and noticed that Snape was handling a strange globe that looked somewhat like a crystal ball. He set it down with a sigh and a shake of his head on a small stand on the supplies cart in the middle of the room. After Snape walked away and stepped over to the headmaster, Harry wandered over to the cart to look also. He suspected this was what they had grabbed away from Voldemort.

The globe swirled just a little and Harry bent down to peer in a little closer. Almost immediately, Harry collapsed to his knees next to the cart. "Harry?" Dumbledore said and stepped over to him followed close on the heels by Professor Snape.

Harry slowly raised his head and looked at them. His breath came in fast gasps. He said painfully, "Someone should tell her what is going on."

"Harry?" Dumbledore repeated and reached for the boy's shoulder.

"If you want I can-" Harry started to say and then sucked in a hard breath and arched as though someone had stuck a knife in him.

After a breath Harry blinked rapidly and looked around the room. He raised his hands, one at a time, and looked at them in wonder. His eyes turned up to the headmaster. "Albus Dumbledore," Harry said as though he hadn't seen him in a long time. He glanced around. "Hogwarts?" he murmured in confusion.