An Honest Wrong

"Harry, why are you bothering? You know it's over between you and him," Harry's best friend revealed. His hand clenched in a fist, trying to control the anger hidden inside of him. That bloody git had been nothing but trouble from the start. What was I thinking allowing that to happen to him? Look at him! He's bloody miserable.

"Ron, I can't help but think that there's still a little shred of hope-" Harry replied, but was sharply interrupted.

"Harry! Get the damn boy out of your head. He cheated on you! You should not want him back! He should be fancying you back in his arms. I mean, mate, look at you! You have been nothing but brooding about the damn situation." Ron was doing his best to help his friend out, to cheer him up, but nothing was working. He had tried almost everything, even offering him a wild night on the town going to nothing but gay bars. Ron could not believe him when he refused. That was his secret passion when Draco was away with his father, whom Draco refused to come out to. Ron hated being dragged along, because usually he got hit on because of his red hair and unusually tall height. Harry just laughed at him.

"Ron, you just need to leave me alone. I don't feel well and I feel that I could kill myself without much pain."

"Alright then. No pointy objects for you, and because of that, do you fancy I cut your meat for you when you come down to supper just so you don't commit matrimonial suicide?"

"Matrimonial?!"

"Sorry, did I use the wrong word?"

"I believe you did, and I'm not going to dinner. I feel like I could throw up at any given moment."

"Mate, now I know you're not going to refuse a chance to eat that pie the elves made special for Dumbledore. Now, get out off of the couch."

"I don't want to."

"Is it absolutely necessary for me to light your ass on fire just so you get up?"

"You wouldn't dare." Ron pulled out his wand in a defensive manner and held it up menacingly.

"Fancy temping me?" Harry did not budge an inch. He crossed his arms and eyebrows in discontent and continued his staring contest with the fireplace. "Fine. Ignatus Glutatus." Within an instant, smoke was coming from the couch and a light sizzling could be heard within the right range. Ron stood in front of Harry with crossed arms and Harry the same, until his face started to shrewd up with pain and severe discomfort. He leaped up as if he was a cartoon character and started to run around in circles, begging anyone put it out. Ron took pity on him and put it out. "Now would you please come down and eat something? Or fancy me doing another spell on you?" Harry did not feel like getting his ass further burned and reluctantly followed Ron out the portal and into the hallway to Hell. There awaited rumors, slander, and food... not in a good, nourishing way.

When they got the doorway of the Grand Hall, Harry stopped dead in his tracks. Ron realized that Harry wasn't following him, and turned to him. Harry gave a look that Ron had been seeing too much recently. "Now, mate, I know it's scary, but I want you to take a deep breath-" Ron inhaled deeply. "-And reeeeeellllaaaaaxxx," he said with a bit of sarcasm in it as he exhaled.

"Ron, this isn't funny. I can't go in there with all those people. Draco's in there. He'll instantly start having goes at me!" Harry exclaimed passionately.

"Relax, mate. He's not going to do that."

"How do you know?"

"Didn't you two used to do that in private? Like in the closets and such?"

"Shut. Up," Harry said curtly as his head twisted in anger and his face heated to a bright red.

"Easy! I was trying to make a joke to get you to calm down!"

"Well, it wasn't funny."

"C'mon. It won't be that bad. Plus, when you get some food in you, you'll stop PMSing on me."

"Did you make that up?"

"No, I heard the American girls use that term."

"Never say it again."

"If I don't, will you go in?" Harry did not speak but just stared blankly ahead of him. "Harry? Harry! HEY, MATE!! RIGHT HERE!" Harry was not paying attention but continued his focus on the object ahead of him. Ron gave up and turned to see who had caught Harry's attention. He could not have been less surprised. "I should have known," he whispered to himself as he felt an extreme surge of anger overwhelming him. He felt as thought he could stab a quill into his own leg and he would not feel the pain. His knuckles turned white as he saw him. "Bloody bastard," he murmured.

Draco did not even pay attention to his ex-lover. He continued conversing with his bodyguards and walking away, slowly, trampling everything they had with ever step.

"Mate, c'mon. Let's go inside. I bet you're starving."

"I can't do it. I can't show my face!"

"Oh, cut the drama and get your ass in there before I have to light it on fire again."

"Go ahead. It's better than what I'm feeling."

"Mate, stop being so bloody ridiculous. You do know you're overly dramatizing, right?" Harry did not respond. He looked away from Ron's face and looked to the floor in hopes of getting something to say to him. The floor just stayed cold and resentful, unwilling to help. Ron sighed. "C'mon. I'm starving, then. Does that provide motivation? And Draco's not in there, so what do you have to worry about?" Harry thought this over and halfheartedly took a step into the hall. A few faces looked up, but paid no special attention to them.

A note here: only very few knew about the Harry/Draco thing, and those who did, made sure to keep it secret. The Slytherins did not want their most eligible bachelor being stained with having an affair with the repulsive, insane Harry Potter. The Gryffindors did not want their icon to be known being involved with the world's biggest bitch. So they both just exchange threatening glances and gestures across the hall when the teachers weren't looking.

After dinner, Harry and Ron got back to the common room, where it was bustling with activity. All the kids were scrambling to get a head-start on their homework that should have taken the week to do. Harry acted as though no one was present. He walked lifelessly through the hustle and bustle, while Ron scrambled to swim through the sea of people. Harry walked up the stairs, dragging his feet behind him, not noticing that Ron was trying his best to get to him. He ran up the steps to the dormitories with his hair in a mess and his robes messed up. Harry turned to look at him and raised an eyebrow. "What? Did Hermione catch you in the hall?"

"Not funny," Ron replied as he straightened himself up. "Have you started that assignment for Snape yet?"

"Yes. In fact, I got it done a while ago."

"How?" Harry did not speak. He looked away from Ron with his eyes going into a mist as his glasses started to fog. "Oh. Sorry. I didn't mean to-" Harry raised a hand to his apology.

"Just... shut up. I don't mean to be rude; I'm just not in a good mood."

"Well... you going to be alright then? I mean, are you capable of being alone, or do you require adult supervision?"

"I'll be fine, Ron. You go ahead. I'm just going to sleep."

"Want me to wake you up if a party ends up sprouting?"

"No, and don't you even think about waking me up. I will personally draw blood."

Ron let out a light chortle. "Alright," he said and took the steps out of the dormitories. It wasn't before he was halfway out the door that he turned to Harry who was pulling his robes over his head. Ron sighed. He nonchalantly leaned against the door and watched Harry for a few moments before he realized he didn't have the time to be gaze at him. He smiled and walked down the stairs, calling out Hermione's name.

When Harry finally pulled the robes over his head, he only saw the candlelit shadow of his best friend as he looked out. He stared at the shadow as it quickly disappeared, like his sense of sanity and reason; like his nerve when he saw Draco... breaking the bonds of their ever so fragile chain of commitment. Everything he felt for him disappeared faster than a flash of lightening. He replayed the thought guiltily as he tried to figure out where things went wrong.

He collapsed on the bed from the sudden wave of nausea that overtook him. As much as he didn't want to think about it, he kept playing it over and over, torturing himself. A part of him said it was all his fault. Another said otherwise. Then another agreed with it. Then another agreed to the other one. Then another said they were all wrong. Harry listened to voices in his head arguing with each other on whose fault it truly was. They started to yell at each other at the top of their lungs which shook Harry's head to painful tremors. On top of the nausea, he now had a headache that felt like it would split open at any moment.

He lied down on the bed and writhed in pain. He lied on his side and tightly closed his eyes as he felt tears coming to his eyes. No. I will not cry over a worthless soul such as his. But then his mind started to torture him again, and the voices continued to argue at the top of their lungs. He clutched his head, trying to take control of his mind and get back his sanity. But no matter what he did, everything continued to wound him, stab him. He felt a tear escape his eye. He cursed himself for letting himself do this. Why was this happening? He should not be like this. Who would feel sorry for a cheater? He was not worthy of pity. Damn him. Damn him to Hell. That is my only wish. His glasses began to fog up as he roughly took them and threw them across the room at the wall. He then sat up with his nausea increasing with every move he made. He curled up in a ball, with his head touching his knees and his arms holding his legs. He continued to let the tears fall, each with a curse.

He then sat up, telling himself to be a man and that Draco was a mistake anyways. Everything they had was a dream... no, a nightmare... one long nightmare that seemed so real. When he touched him, he felt the softness of his skin on his fingertips and when he kissed him, he felt the slightly chapped lips upon his and rendered such a feeling of lust that he could not resist. It was like a drug. Maybe this was all a hallucination that was a result of a drug that's high lasted forever. Oh, but what he would do to get another taste, another breath of the ecstasy that surpassed him. "I need it.... I need it," he started to state, like a mantra, over and over. His eyes stained red with the poison in his eyes stared into the darkness of the room, blinking only when something seemed to jump at him.

Ron came back in the room after taking a long period downstairs to finish homework. Harry paid no attention as he stated the mantra he had been reciting, imaging the having the feeling back. The ecstasy, the lust, the love, the pure unadulterated high he had felt for so long it was a ritual for him. Ron walked slowly over to him, thinking he might lash out at him if he were to disturb him. He saw Harry's glasses on the floor, with one of the lenses slightly cracked. He picked them up and realized what had happened in the time that he was gone. He went over to Harry and knelt down before his face. Harry seemed to be in his own world, not even noticing the one in front of his face. Ron waved a hand in front of his face. He sighed and slightly frowned as he repaired his glasses with a spell and put them back on. Harry twitched and as if he had a spasm, took the glasses off and threw them on the floor. "I do not want to see anymore," he said as he stopped his song. But he continued to look past Ron, as if he didn't see him.

"Yes, you do. You would miss a lot of things in the world. I know what happened, alright? And I can understand that you are heartbroken and pissed off to a max. But I want you to know that I am your best friend. I will always be here for you, no matter how bad things get, mate," Ron explained.

"What makes you think you can uphold that promise?" Harry said as he turned on his back to stare at the ceiling, which was darker than the room was. "Draco said the same thing. He said he loved me and that he would always be there for me. Then I see him with that- that-" he gasped as he restrained himself from crying.

Ron sat next to Harry on the bed. He then picked up Harry's head and placed it on his chest. Harry put his arms around Ron's waist as he sat there. "Mate, it's gonna' be alright. I know what heartbreak feels like. It hurts, I know, but you're going to be fine. You've had far worse things than this before," Ron comforted. Harry finally let everything he had prohibited himself from doing fall out like a waterfall.

"But it was horrible!" he cried. "Worst thing is... I didn't even expect it. I didn't see it coming when I should have. I should have seen this coming. Why didn't I listen?! Why didn't I see?! WHY?!"

"It's not your fault, mate. It's nowhere near your fault," Ron said he stroked his fingers through Harry's hair, which made Harry a little uncomfortable. "If it was, I wouldn't be here right now. Besides, that bloody bitch doesn't deserve you. Someone else who's far better than him is looking for someone like you. You'll find someone else soon enough."

"Ron, why are you stoking my hair?" Harry said suspiciously. Ron stopped immediately.

"Sorry, mate. Didn't mean for that to happen," Ron said apologetically.

"What do you mean you didn't 'mean' for that to happen?" Harry interrogated as he looked up at Ron and released his embrace. "Are there other things you didn't 'mean' to happen, Ron?"

"Harry... what's wrong with you?" Ron asked as he realized what Harry was doing.

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe it has something to do with you," Harry replied with his eyebrows furrowed with anger.

"Don't go lookin' at me for a scapegoat to all this, Harry! I was just trying to be something called 'nice'! Ever heard of it?" Ron said as he raised his voice.

"Yes, and you're not doing it! This is all your fault!"

"My fault?! My fault?! What the hell did I do?!"

"You broke us up because you wanted me for yourself!"

"What the hell?! Harry! I may not have agreed with your relationship, but I would never want to break it up!" Ron shouted. "Plus, did you see me in that bed, or was it Blaise that was with him?!"

"You induced it! You gave Blaise a little something for the trouble... just to get Draco out of the way...."

"Mate-"

"Don't you dare call me that again. I know what you did."

"You are bloody delirious! None of this ever happened! Just because I made that one little move to comfort you-"

"AHA! So you planned this all along! You thought that you could take advantage of me, but you CAN'T!"

"Jesus, what the FUCK are you talking about?! There was no plan, there was no something, there wasn't anything!! NONE OF THIS WAS MY BLOODY FAULT!! JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE FACT THAT YOU DIDN'T SATISFY HIM DOESN'T MEAN THIS WAS ENTIRELY MY BLOODY FAULT!!" Ron seethed as his face was now turned to a bright red with anger. "NOW DON'T ACCUSE ME OF BEING SUCH BECAUSE I DIDN'T DO SHIT!! YOU NEED TO SIGN IN AT ST. MUNGO'S TO GET YOUR HEAD STRAIGHT! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING OF ACCUSING ME?!" Ron's eyes started to water. "I was your best friend! I would never do that! You even know that. But you know what? If you're going to be like that then maybe I don't need to be around you. If you don't trust me, then why bother?" Ron then stormed out of the room in a rage Harry had never seen before. He didn't care. Ron betrayed him. His own best friend... betrayed him. He stuffed his face into his pillow to muffle the tears that were overwhelming him. First his lover, then his best friend... who's next?

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