Blood Makes Noise

Lupin walked silently through the halls of number twelve, Grimmauld Place. He had checked every room but one. He should have known, he thought grimly to himself, which room to look in first. He knocked lightly on the door to Mrs. Black's bedroom. There was no answer.

Lupin frowned slightly and turned the knob, opening the door a crack. "Sirius?" he asked softly.

"What?" asked a surly voice.

Lupin took that as an invitation and entered the room. Sirius was sitting on a large four-poster bed with serpents as the posts, feeding Buckbeak rats. Lupin looked away from the eating hippogriff and sat next to Sirius on the bed. "How are you?"

"Oh, I'm fine. Having a bloody grand time here at the noble and most ancient home of Black. Starting to forget why I ran away in the first place. It's so jolly and festive here."

Lupin sighed softly. "Sirius, I know how difficult it is for you -"

Sirius gave a harsh laugh that sounded like a bark. "I think it's really cool that you're concerned. But we'll have to try again after the silence has returned."

"What silence?"

Sirius didn't answer Lupin's question and tossed another rat to Buckbeak, who caught in his mouth and bit it in two.

Lupin didn't prod Sirius, knowing that would only lead to an outburst. He sat patiently next to Sirius, waiting silently as his old friend continued to feed Buckbeak.

When Sirius had fed the last rat to Buckbeak, he dropped the empty bag to the floor and turned his attention to Lupin who sat next to him. "Do you believe in karma, Remus?"

Lupin furrowed his brow thoughtfully at Sirius. "Karma?"

Sirius sighed heavily and shook his head, returning his eyes to Buckbeak. "Do you think we're paying for the sins of our youth?"

"No, Sirius, I don't believe that," Lupin answered sincerely. "And you shouldn't believe that either."

Sirius nodded distractedly at Lupin. "Hungry?"

Lupin glanced toward Buckbeak. "I was, but after watching Buckbeak eat, not so much anymore," Lupin answered with a hint of a smile.

Sirius snorted. "Leave it the werewolf to be easily made queasy."

Lupin stood. "Yes, I agree, I'm quite a disgrace to the label of werewolf."

Sirius nodded. "You are indeed, Moony."

~*~

After dinner, Sirius and Lupin sat at the table, nursing their drinks. Lupin's was hot chocolate and Sirius was drinking firewhiskey.

"If anything were to happen to me -" Sirius started.

"Don't say that, Sirius," Lupin interrupted in a quiet, yet forceful tone.

"If anything were to happen to me," Sirius continued stubbornly, "I know I can count on you to watch over Harry."

Lupin frowned, but said, "I will, Sirius, but nothing in going to happen to you."

Sirius laughed harshly and took a large dreg out of his glass. "Of course, nothing is going to happen to me. How could it? Safely tucked away in my hiding place, aren't I? What harm could befall me here? I don't think boredom kills."

Lupin took a deep breath in, trying to find the right words to quell Sirius' frustrations at being holed away in this horrific house, unable to take a more active role in the Order. "You are vital to the Order, Sirius. Just knowing you're here is a great comfort to Harry," Lupin paused, noting that Sirius' gaze had gone distant and unfocused. Lupin continued on despite the fact that he was now quite sure Sirius was not listening. "Your day will come, Sirius. You have to believe that. We will gather the evidence to have the charges dropped against you. We'll find Peter and bring him to the Ministry."

Sirius didn't see Lupin, didn't hear him. He was falling through the darkness, everything fading away into the distance. Faces he loved, faces he hated, voices he would never tire of and others that did nothing but taunt him, all of them fading from his sight and hearing. Replacing the faces and voices were a deep swirl of redness and a strange pumping sound that flooded his senses. Blood makes noise. And I can't really hear you in the thickening of fear. The thought echoed repeatedly in Black's head until he felt a hand grasp his shoulder tightly and shake him.

"Sirius, are you okay?" Lupin asked in a tone that managed to be both soft and urgent.

Sirius looked up at his old friend and nodded. "I'm fine," he answered without thought.

"You will be a free man again," Lupin said, still squeezing Sirius' shoulder.

Sirius nodded at Lupin again. "Yes, I will be," Sirius agreed. But not in a way that will bring you in happiness, Moony, Sirius thought.

Lupin released his hold on Sirius' shoulder and Sirius rose from the table. Sirius abruptly changed the subject. "I think," he said in the conspiratorial whisper of a teenaged boy, "that Tonks is crushing on you."

Lupin only rolled his eyes at this comment. "Tonks is probably being crushed by something she's tripped over. I have to be off for tonight. I'll be around tomorrow."

As Sirius walked him to the door, Lupin thought he heard a strange sound. Blood pumping...it surrounded him, enveloped his senses. Lupin took a deep breath, shrugged it off to the atmosphere of the house, and hurried out into the darkness where all was silent.

~*~

Lupin stood at the train station, watching as Harry and the Dursleys left the bustling station. He cursed himself silently as the figures grew smaller in the distance, finally disappearing completely. I should have said something more to Harry about Sirius, he thought. Suddenly, the background noise of the train station faded and all Lupin could hear was an odd rushing sound in his ears.

Tonks tugged on Lupin's well-worn overcoat. "Ready to go?"

Lupin nodded, the pumping noise in his ears fading into the background. "Yes, quite." He noticed that Mad-Eye Moody and Weasleys were already quite a distance away and wondered how long he his mind had wandered.

"Hungry?" Tonks asked as they walked out of the station, winking broadly at a Muggle businessman that had been giving her sideways look.

Lupin shrugged and Tonks took that to be a yes. "Great, we'll get some bangers at the Leaky Cauldron."

"Yes, but please don't make your nose resemble one while we're eating. Makes me queasy."

Tonks grinned widely at Lupin. "Deal," she said.

They walked quietly for several minutes and Tonks spoke again. "In a week or so, we'll go visit, eh? Check up on Harry? Talk to him a bit?"

Lupin glanced at Tonks and a small smile crossed his face. "Yes, let's do that."

"It'll make Harry feel better. Not to mention the added benefit of tormenting the Dursleys."

Lupin arched a brow at the young Auror, but didn't reproach her. He reached his hand toward hers, softly grazing it with his own, but not grasping it.

"Hmmm..." Tonks said in an interested tone, her eyebrows rising and falling quickly in a sideways look at Lupin.

They weaved through the busy streets of London, not talking, but comfortable with the silence. As they entered Diagon Alley Lupin turned to Tonks and said, "You hear the noise too, don't you?"

Tonks didn't answer immediately, her hair changing from shocking pink to purple and then back again as she stood silently in front of Lupin.

Lupin waited anxiously, thinking he had been wrong and now Tonks thought him to be quite a nutter. "I shouldn't have said -"

Tonks shook her head at him, raising a finger to his lips to silence him. "Shhh. I do hear it."

"What do you think it is?"

"Fear. Death calling. But we're not going to let it take us. Nor will we let it touch Harry."

Lupin opened his mouth to speak, but Tonks shook her spiky head in the negative. "Food first, conversation later," she said firmly, grabbing Lupin's hand and leading him toward the Leaky Cauldron.

His fingers intertwined with Tonks' and Lupin found he couldn't keep a smile off his face. The blood was silent and once again he felt the glimmer of hope in his soul.

The End