Waning

TITLE: Waning

BY: Dev-Aki Basaa

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A waning moon had powers nearly as potent as the full moon. Like lingering tendrils, not ready to let him go, Remus could feel the moon's pull, even a week after transformation. She woke him in the night, calling for him to return to her control, swirling around him these strange eddies only he could feel. She toyed with his dreams; she twisted his stomach into knots. He'd wake, squinting in the moonlight, a moan slipping past his lips. He'd feel ill, sweaty or sometimes his head would spin if he tried to lift it. The after effects of his transformation never lingered the same way twice, as if the moon kept trying some new way to keep him in her thrall, reminding him that in just a few short weeks, he'd return to her in full. He'd belong to her again. Remus had never mentioned these nightly spells. He hadn't wanted to disturb his dorm-mates and cause them to worry any more than they already did. However, if his intent was to keep the lingering illness a secret -! -

"Moony, what is it?"

Then he shouldn't have started sharing Sirius' bed. Curled on his side behind Remus, Sirius had propped himself up and whispered close to Remus' ear. The rush of hot breath over his skin sent a shiver down Remus' spine. It made him think of the night before the full moon and the tenderness in Sirius' touch, hot breath over intimately bared skin. This, between them, was something special. Remus knew that. It was also new and fragile, though, and Sirius had already taken on so much just being Remus' friend. How much more of a burden could he be?

Remus shook his head, even as the small motion made his stomach lurch. "Nothing, go back to sleep." His voice sounded weak, not hushed, as Sirius' had been.

He felt Sirius' fingers brush down his arm, sliding to his wrist and then back up again to caress his shoulder. Sirius shifted a little closer; Remus could feel the bulge of an early arousal, not yet hard, but there. Maybe Sirius had been dreaming about him. Remus wished his dreams could be so pleasant -- they rarely were.

"Bollocks, what's wrong?"

Remus rolled onto his back and Sirius shifted to allow him the room. Sighing, Remus stared up at the canopy for a moment, focusing on the shadowy hills and vales of the rich red velvet, even though it was hidden by the darkness. Remus had seen it enough times, he knew what it looked like by daylight and wand light and a sparkling charm Sirius had tried once. He could see it with his eyes closed.

Remus waited for his stomach to settle from the simple moment before he looked over at Sirius. Sirius was still propped up on his elbow, leaning over him and seeming to study his face for any hint of what might be wrong.

Remus managed a smile. "It's nothing, really." Sirius furrowed his brow and didn't look the least bit convinced. So, Remus amended. "At least, nothing new," he said.

"What's that mean?" Even in the darkness, Remus could see Sirius' eyes widen. "Moony, what is--"

Remus pressed his fingers to Sirius' lips, silencing him. Remus smiled at the simple intimacy of this act. It was just fingers to lips, but fingers that had explored Sirius' body and lips that had kissed every inch of Remus' flesh. Remus brushed his fingers across Sirius' lips, slow, deliberate, mapping each nuance.

"Moony." Sirius' voice sounded thick and aroused and Remus realized then what he needed. He slid his fingers to caress the arch of Sirius' cheek; he threaded his them into Sirius' hair.

"Distract me." Remus saw Sirius smile before he closed his eyes at the press of Sirius' lips against his mouth.

While the first kiss had only been a few weeks ago, they'd already lost the awkwardness of new, young lovers. More stolen moments than they could count had given them ample chance to explore each other's bodies and learn the touches that brought the greatest pleasure.

Remus knew from the deepness of Sirius' moan how much he loved it when Remus wrapped his arms around his neck and buried his fingers in his hair. Sirius had learned how easily he could draw a desperate noise from Remus just by stroking the inside of his bare thigh.

Remus arched with Sirius' moments, his voice a steady litany that seemed detached and elsewhere to him. Over and over he said Sirius' name like a chant or a prayer. It chased away the moon. It showed the moon who he belonged to; to whom he'd willingly given himself.

Remus felt the eddies recede as the tension rose. The moon had met her match in Sirius, whether Sirius knew it or not. Perhaps she could own Remus on her one night, but there would be no more lingering possession. There would be no more desperate attempts to take him early.

"Sirius, oh!"

That would only belong to Sirius now. If he had to prove it to the moon every night, if their acts of love had to become as much a declaration as a ritual, so be it.

Remus clutched Sirius as he felt the pleasure rush over him like a liquid hot wave; he felt Sirius shudder against him. The weight of Sirius' limp and sated body pressed Remus deeper into the mattress. He felt pressure against his stomach and there was no answering lurch or twist. The moon still hung high in the sky, but all Remus felt was satisfied warmth low in his belly.

"Feeling better?"

Remus hummed a moment before he answered. His eyes still closed, he smiled. "Much."

"Good."

Sirius kissed his shoulder then his neck. He licked a droplet of sweat Remus felt sliding under his chin and Remus chuckled. It had tickled.

"I love you."

Remus opened his eyes and turned his head to look at Sirius. No one had ever said that to him before. Well, no, his parents had. However, parents didn't say it with that kind of intensity behind their tone. They didn't hold that much hope in their eyes.

Remus brought his hand up to brush across Sirius' cheek. Sirius tipped his head and rubbed into the caress. "I love you," Sirius said again, whispered; he closed his eyes as Remus cupped his jaw.

Remus couldn't swallow; his throat felt tight, but he said it anyway. He said it breathless and awed and broken, caught in his emotions. He said it true.

"I love you too."

Sirius opened his eyes and his smile lit up the world. He then laid his head down on Remus' chest, his hair fanned across Remus' side. That tickled as well, but Remus welcomed the feel of it. He felt Sirius sigh, felt his chest rise against his own and felt him exhale across his skin.

"Good."

Remus smiled. Yes, good. He tilted his head so he could see the dorm-room window. The moon was out of his sight, but he couldn't miss her light. It had receded, though, and Remus liked to think she'd given up for the time being. Sirius' smile was stronger than her tonight anyway. Her power was waning for now; Sirius' only grew.

Sirius' breathing had evened out, steady and deep. Remus slipped his hand under the fall of Sirius' hair and cupped his nape. He could feel the thump of Sirius' pulse, as steady and even as Sirius' breath. He focused himself on those things, on Sirius, on the way Sirius' fingers curled over his shoulder. He focused on his settled stomach and own steady heartbeat. Hooking his ankle over Sirius' calf, Remus fully relaxed. He knew the eddies were gone at last.

~ end