One Shot

"Breathe...I forgot to breathe," Ginny huskily whispered under her breath in determination. Her quiet dorm room was a peaceful glow of yellow, and the contrast between the soft breathing of her unconscious roomies to her own inner storm of butterflies excited her. She blinked back the dim streaks of early morning light filtering through the curtained windows, and crossed over decidedly to her dressing table. Picking up a brush and absently bringing it through her hair, she tried to ignore the radiant anxiety pulsing through her.

She smiled at the dewy atmosphere. Today is finally the day. Even though the thought sounded cheesy in her mind, it still gave her a thrill.

No more endless waiting or unrelieved wondering; this morning she had decided to go confront Harry herself. She was tired of walking subconsciously through the day, and half heartedly attending to her studies and life. There are only so many nights of torture, and of want, the whole 'waiting for him to perhaps take notice of me and make a move'...There was only so much she could take, before in a daze she decided that there was no need to deny herself the truth; she'd take matters into her own hands.

Hmm, Ginny nibbled on her lips as she pulled on a pair of well worn sexy jeans, I wouldn't mind taking Harry in my hands, not at all...

Blushing and looking semi-guiltily around the room, she checked that everyone was still asleep. She hurried about in the restroom.

She knew she only had one shot at this, which meant she was willing to pull out all stops. She spat out her mouthful of gargled mouthwash and wiped her mouth. A drip of water rolled idly from her wet red lips. Smiling juicily up at her reflection and brushing a towel across her face, she stepped back. She was sporting a slim button down plaid shirt, which hugged her in all the right places, and her soft red hair hung loosely in a messy chic ponytail. Normally, she didn't worry too much about how she looked, but this morning she made sure everything was nice without giving the impression that she'd gone out of her way to look good. Simple and effective; her big brown eyes gleamed as she left the bathroom.

When she could find nothing left to do to herself, she grabbed a paper from her notebook and slipped on some sneakers and left the room as not to miss Harry before breakfast. And before she lost her nerve, too.

As she reached the door to the boy's dormitory, Ginny paused. She knew going in there meant she would discover the truth for herself, and whatever the turn out, she knew she wanted to know it. Brushing her last minute jitters aside, she knocked twice on the door. The knocks sounded hollow and loudly, provoking her pounding heart beat.

There was a pause and a sound of scrambling from within the room, and then silence. Fearing to knock again, Ginny leaned lightly against the door to hear for more commotion or signs of living life forms. Next, the door opened hastily and she lost her balance as she teetered forward.

She landed halfway onto a broad chest. "Hi Harry." She grinned brightly up at the surprised green eyes that peered down at her.

"Err...Hi Ginny..." Harry held her up and stepped back. There was an awkward pause in which Harry noticed in amusement the look of harassment that flickered across Ginny's face when she noticed all the sleeping forms on the Gryffindor beds.

"Do you want to meet me down at the breakfast hall in a minute? I still kind of have to..." Harry gestured at his boxers.

"Ah, right, haha, you haven't dressed yet," the redhead babbled stupidly, having just caught on. She turned back towards the door, face flaming and mind ice blank. Before she could reach the door knob, a warm hand took her wrist and gently turned her around.

Harry placed a finger to his lips, signaling for quiet. Ginny controlled her breathing but had lost her track since she'd stumbled into the door. She lowered her head awkwardly.

"Actually, I'm not sure if I'm going down anytime soon, so why don't you just quickly tell me what you needed," Harry whispered, and smiled nicely at her as though dealing with a young pupil.

Slightly indignant, Ginny couldn't bring words to her mouth. He was bent slightly down to close in on the distance in which Ginny's mouth came to his ear. She could tell he had something on his mind and that it was a bad time to confess anything, but she couldn't just blow him off now that he was attentively listening. She took a breath and looked up into his patient green eyes.

He was so beautiful, his bed head sexy black hair falling into his inquiring glossy eyes, which always held a bit of distance and the look of patient tolerance in them. Her heart rose and fell at the same time. The boy's eyes always put such distance between them, and she wanted to risk all she had to reach out and bring him to understand her feelings for him. The genuiness was what he never gave her, and warmth was what she longed receive from him.

On impulse, Ginny quietly reached up and pressed her soft lips against his. Her eyes never closed, she needed to see into the green depth of his eyes, and waited for them to close in trust and acceptance to her. They did close, but in a heartbeat as he backed away. As the air rushed in between them as he pulled away, Ginny froze. Her cheeks burned with icy flames, and she couldn't move. Harry had his head lowered, blinking slowly as he registered what just happened. He looked apologetically, or was it with pity, back at the younger girl.

"Ginny, I'm sorry. But-I can't let you do that." He looked worriedly at the redhead, and after a slight moment of hesitation, stepped forward and pulled her into his arms.

She stiffened as she was held against him. This was where she had longed to end up this morning, in his arms. But his touch burned her with shame and embarrassment. This was not how she wanted him to hold her, out of sympathy and comfort of a friend. She was pressed up against him, her check against his chest in which his heart beat tauntingly at her, forever out of reach. She scrambled out of his arms to regain control.

Hurt twisted her child like face, and Harry stood where he was. There was nothing left to do, but apologize and leave, yet she couldn't. As if her body had ceased to be under her control since she had stumbled into Harry's room this morning, she refused to give up. She had promised to give all that she got, and her finger's started to slide down and undo her blouse on their own accord. Mouth parted and eyes fixed on Harry, she whispered, "Would this change your mind?"

Her blouse dropped to the floor, along with all conscious thoughts on her part of any thing other but the boy in front of her. Harry looked strained, looking away from the slender pale form of the girl before him. Ginny sneered in disgust at his lack of response, and backed up onto his bed, slipping off her jeans. Heat seeped onto her skin from the mattress under the mountain of covers. It was still warm from Harry's body...Ginny tingled as if being tickled. Looking down for a moment away from Harry, she realized there was something soft and fine brushing against her from the pillow. In a rush of frightening awareness, Ginny started when the heat shifted. The sheets rolled over and a wash of long black hair cascaded over a pillow, like a bloody black glistening waterfall. Ginny came to her senses with a jab in her heart, like a knife wound. She sat stunned by the sight of those dark strands of hair gleaming atop of the blinding white bed sheets. She stonily looked up at a silent Harry.

"How stupid of me." Pearly tears rolled down her expressionless face. A little sigh coming from the blankets beside her indicated the other girl was still sound asleep. A strange shadow rolled into Ginny's eyes.

"You slept with Cho..."

* * * *

(On a piece of notebook paper Harry found later...)

"I mean to be good to you,

As unnoticeable it goes, I do.

I want to be friends with you,

And if I could

Gather all courage I would.

But every time you're there,

My head holds high,

As if I don't care.

But if only you knew,

Inside,

Grow wild, untamed

Butterflies.

Try to meet your stunning eyes,

But I don't dare...

Foolishly afraid of what I'd find there.

But just catch me when I'm dreaming,

It's me and you I can't stop seeing.

Don't know if it's right,

That why I keep this fear hidden.

One day I'll swallow my pride,

Stop hiding.

Maybe then,

You'll catch me smiling.

Then you'll see,

Understand,

In the gentleness behind my eyes and hand...

It's then you'll feel what I'm feeling.