Screaming Infidelities

I'm missing your bed, I never sleep

Avoiding the spots, where we'd have to speak

And this bottle of beast, Is taking me home.

Katie sat on a mossy covered rock, looking towards the castle and its misty grounds. Her back was to the silvery lake, and she was trying to forget about her broken relationship with Oliver Wood.

It was a clear night, the moon being the solitary source of light, the only sound, the distant chime of the clock, indicating midnight.

A noise pulled Katie back to reality. She looked up and saw two laughing figures running towards the Quidditch pitch. Even from the distance, she could tell one of them was Oliver; the other she assumed was Sarah.

Katie sighed, silent tears beginning to fall. There was a time when that was her. In fact, just a week ago, she had thought the situation between her and Oliver was fine. She thought they would be together forever. This time last week, she was in his bed, his arms around her keeping her safe and warm

I'm cuddling close to blankets and sheets.

But you're not alone, and you're not discrete.

Make sure I know who's taking you home.

Not tonight though - tonight she was sitting here cold and alone. The worst part though was that she wasn't supposed to know. She had noticed a change in Oliver over the past month but simply dismissed the thought, supposing it was the pressure he was under. Of course, Katie had assumed the best of him, something she had a habit of doing. It wasn't stress though; and if it was, he'd found a release for it.

Then she'd found out. Of all people Katie had had to hear it from Percy, who had witnessed Oliver and Sarah together in the empty charms classroom. At first Katie had refused to believe that the man she loved would ever do such a thing. Then she had seen it with her own eyes

I'm reading your note, over again.

And there's not a word that I comprehend

Except when you signed it, I will love you always and forever.

The two of them were supposed to be together tonight. They had nothing special planned, and Katie had thought it was enough for him just spending time with her. That was until he sent her an owl at breakfast saying he couldn't make it. She hadn't even had a chance to ask him about it, he had succeeded in avoiding her all day.

The note, one of the sweetest things she'd ever received, was the last straw. It was the deception hidden within it, which caused the last remaining piece of her fragile heart to shatter.

Dearest Katie,

I really really hate to do this, and I hope you forgive me, but I'm going to have to pull out of tonight. I'm falling pretty far behind in charms and Flitwick has given me a mountain of extra homework. Again, I am so so sorry; I will make it up to you I promise,

Love,

Oliver

Well as for now I'm gonna hear the saddest songs.

And sit alone and wonder, how you're making out.

But as for me, I wish that I was anywhere, with anyone,

Making out.

The second she had read that note she knew it was a lie, and seeing them together now just confirmed it. Katie couldn't help but wonder what it was she had done wrong, what she had done to drive him into her arms.

Katie could still see them now, standing very close in the middle of the pitch. She shivered and pulled her knees up to her chest. In vain she blamed her trembling on the cold air.

She was sitting here alone, cold and sad, when she should be in the arms of her boyfriend, curled up together in front of a warm fire. That wasn't going to happen, though; not when he was busy making out with some Ravenclaw.

I'm missing your laugh. How did it break?

And when did your eyes begin to look fake?

I hope you're as happy as your pretending.

As she sat there, Katie tried to pin point when things changed. Things between herself and Oliver had been strained for almost a month now. She thought things were fine once Oliver's mood became brighter about a week ago. Then, three days previously, she discovered she wasn't the reason the spark had returned to his eyes.

Katie was torn from her thoughts by a laugh. Her tears begin to flow again, as she realised it was his laugh - a laugh she hadn't heard for a long time. Katie sighed. Tired from crying, she decided to head back to the common room.

I'm cuddling close to blankets and sheets.

And I am alone, in my defeat.

I wish I knew you were safely at home.

I'm missing your bed, I never sleep.

Avoiding the spots where we'd have to speak.

And this bottle of beast is taking me home.

It was after one when she got to the Gryffindor tower. The stark cold of the corridors had woken her up so she decided to sit by the fire. She pulled a blanket over her and sat staring into the orange flames.

Katie sat in front of the fire, replaying the past week in her head. She feared the sight of Sarah, sitting on a desk, her legs wrapped around Oliver's waist; would haunt her forever.

Katie wished with everything she had that nothing had happened, that she was upstairs with Oliver, in his arms. She wished she were the girl he loved, who made him happy. Right now, she wished she were Sarah.

Well as for now I'm gonna hear the saddest songs.

And sit alone and wonder, how your making out.

But as for me, I wish that I was anywhere, with anyone,

Making out.

Katie had contemplated doing what Oliver was doing to her. She wouldn't have any trouble; most guys would sell their souls for a night with Katie Bell. She could even crush Oliver by going after the man he truly hated, Marcus Flint. She couldn't bring herself to do it though. She couldn't inflict the pain she was feeling onto someone else.

Your hair, it's everywhere.

Screaming infidelities.

And taking its wear.

Your hair, it's everywhere.

Screaming infidelities.

And taking its wear.

The portrait door slowly swung open, causing Katie's eyes to dart towards it. She was slightly surprised to see Oliver enter. His hair was a mess, grass strewn through it, his cloak had been hastily put on, his shirts top button was missing, and the grass had left a number of light green stains on the once white shirt.

Oliver's eyes scanned the common room before landing on Katie. Their eyes met and she could see the guilt swimming in them. He ran a hand through his hair before walking over and sitting next to her.

He smiled at her cautiously before speaking.

"Hey, Kates, what are you still doing up?"

Katie looked at him; he noticed her eyes were red and puffy. He knew something had upset her, and while he didn't want to hurt her anymore, he knew he had to tell her now.

"I couldn't sleep," Katie finally spoke up.

Oliver could feel her gaze burning through him. "Katie, we need to talk...well, I need to talk"

She looked at him expectantly. She wanted more than anything for him to confess, say he was sorry, that he loved her and that what he had done was a mistake, however she knew the likely hood of that.

Katie could feel tears welling in her eyes; she didn't want to cry, not in front of him, not now. She closed her eyes, a single tear escaping. Oliver noticed and leaned towards her to wipe it gently away. He knew what he had to say was the hardest thing he had ever had to. He tilted her head to look at him.

"Katie, I don't want to do this, but I can't keep pretending... We can't keep pretending"

Katie's tears were flowing freely now. "Oliver, I..."

She didn't have anything else. She searched for reasons to make him stay but she couldn't find anything, nothing except, "I love you...and I thought you loved me"

He sighed, looking at the broken girl in front of him.

"Katie, it's not that easy...I do love you, but..."

"But what, Oliver? There are no but's - that's what a relationship is; two people who love each other. What else is there?"

Katie was shaking. Her voice held anger, but more than that, it held desperation. She was clinging hopelessly to the man she loved and he was going to let her fall.

He wiped her tears away again, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Katie, I love you, I do... but...but I'm not in love with you... not anymore."

Even though she had known it was coming, those words hurt so much more than she had imagined they would. Katie tried to get up; right now, she wanted to be anywhere, anywhere except here.

Oliver grabbed her wrist gently, not wanting her to leave before they sorted this mess out.

Katie looked at him, she was glad he stopped her because there was one more thing she wanted to know.

"Are you in love with her?"

Oliver looked at her wide-eyed. She couldn't possibly know...

"Katie, what...?"

She cut him off, "Damnit, Oliver - are you in love with her? It's a simple question, so answer!"

Oliver knew she deserved the truth, even if it was going to hurt.

"I'm in love with her...but, Katie, you need to know..."

"That's all I needed to know, Oliver"

They sat there together for what seemed like forever. Even though Oliver was there next to her, she had never felt more alone.

Oliver broke the silence. "I really should go to bed"

Katie didn't answer, only nodding.

Oliver sighed and headed to his room.

"Oliver--"

He stopped and turned to look at Katie. "Yeah?"

"Do you regret anything? I mean... do you regret being with me?"

He looked at her before going and sitting next to her. He took her hands in his before speaking.

"Katie, I could never regret a minute of what we had. The time we spent together was incredible. You showed me there was more to life than Quidditch."

They both grinned a little.

"I don't regret it, either...even if this isn't the way I pictured it ending."

He sighed. "I'm sorry. It wasn't how I pictured it ending either, it just happened this way."

She nodded. Oliver leaned into her and kissed her. It was gentle and sweet but there was no love there anymore.

He pulled away and stood up. "Well, goodnight."

He left her sitting there in front of the fire. She sat for a while before getting up and going to bed. As she closed the door to her room she thought about the time she spent with Oliver. It might not have been a happy ending but it was an ending and as she closed the door, with it she closed the chapter of her life that had been Oliver Wood.

Your hair, it's everywhere.

Screaming infidelities.

And taking its wear.