Snivellus

Snivellus

Severus Snape's long fingers closed around the coin as he hauled his dented trunk onto the Hogwarts Express. He dodged through the corridor, searching for an empty compartment. But every time he looked through a door he saw taller, stronger children, chattering in loud voices. At last he found one which contained only a single boy, sitting with his face obscured by a book. It would have to do. Severus slid the door open and sat at the furthest distance from the other boy he could manage, hunched up on the velvet seat.

'Hi,' said the other boy, peering over the cover of his book.

Severus gave a grunt in answer.

'Are you a first year?'

He jerked his head. The boy's face brightened. 'Me too. I'm Remus Lupin.'

Severus paused for a long time before answering, 'Severus Snape' and looking away. Carefully, he slid his wand out of his sleeve, holding it concealed behind his knees which were bent up to his chest. He ignored the boy's next question, corrected his wand's aim, and whispered, 'Somnulens.'

Remus Lupin's eyelids drooped. He yawned and his head nodded forward. The book slipped to the floor. In a few seconds he was asleep. Now, to all intents and purposes, Severus had the compartment to himself. The train gave a jerk and began to puff forwards. Severus watched the platform with wary eyes, and felt an odd mixture of relaxation and fright as it slid backwards and was gone.

The other boy gave a soft snore. Severus wanted to sleep too, but thrust the feeling away. Now was not the time. He raised his wand thoughtfully. Now that he was here on the Hogwarts Express, he could remove the charm that prevented the Ministry from detecting when he used it. It had taken three days of searching through the back shelves of the gloomy second-hand bookshops down Knockturn Alley to find a book of misdirection spells, and three more days of practice to get it right. It had not occurred to Severus to be concerned that the spell was illegal, for who would know? And who would care? The real problem had been that he couldn't perform charms on his own wand without borrowing someone else's. Fortunately, his father was forever leaving his own wand lying around. But his father's wand was not here now. Severus considered the problem.

Then he saw Remus Lupin's wand protruding from his coat pocket. Silent as a shadow, Severus slipped it out and held it thoughtfully for a few moments, considering how well it would work for him. It seemed to be about the same length as his own, a good sign.

'Deripe!' he said firmly, tracing the length of the strange wand over his own. There was a puff of dark, aniseed-scented smoke, and his own wand shuddered. Severus waved the smoke away. As far as he could tell, it had worked. He replaced the other wand in exactly the position he had found it, and sat back.

Some minutes later, the compartment door slid open, and Severus jumped out of the reverie he had sunk into.

'Something off the trolley, my dears?' said a saccharine voice. The scent of chocolate and spiced pumpkin wafted in, and Severus' mouth watered. He had scarcely eaten since yesterday breakfast. But food was too insignificant a thing to spend his single Galleon on. He shook his head at the witch and looked away until she left.

Severus contemplated his Galleon. He had not asked how his mother had obtained it. She had pressed it into his hand just before he set out alone from their basement flat for Kings Cross. He had not been able to thank her, of course, lest his father hear and notice. He had never had a Galleon before, and he was resolved to buy a book of jinxes and hexes. Protection was more important than food.

His eye fell on the other boy's wallet, protruding from his bag. He could take something and buy some food from the witch … but no. The boy would know it was he who had taken it, in the absence of anyone else to blame. There was no point getting into trouble when you would have to take the blame for it afterwards.

The door slid open yet again. Two boys stood in the doorway. One was munching a pumpkin pasty, and the other blowing disgusting purple bubbles with Droobles Best Blowing Gum. Both wore new, clean robes, polished shoes and shiny hats. Severus felt shabby and hungry and furiously envious.

'Can we come in?' said the pumpkin pasty boy through a mouthful. He assumed the answer and stepping into the compartment. A purple bubble followed him and drifted towards Severus.

'No. Go away.' Severus gave him his father's best glare, and Pumpkin Pasty quailed. Bubble Gum popped a bubble noisily.

'Not very friendly, are you?'

Severus tried to increase the power of his glare, but (he had known it) succeeded only in looking cross-eyed.

The sleeping boy gave a snort.

'Ah, he said yes,' said Pumpkin Pasty with a grin, 'so we'll come in anyway.'

They both sat down, loose-limbed and confident, on the bench beside Remus Lupin. Bubble Gum waved the packet at Severus.

'Want some?'

'No.' Severus had discovered that chewing gum only made him feel hungrier, and his sole attempt at eating it had made him ill.

'You a first year too?'

Severus ignored the question and stared fixedly away from the intruders.

'What's your name?'

Severus continued to stare out the window at the hills rushing by. His fingers were clenching around his wand, but if he was going to take on two at once he would need something to hide behind, and there wasn't anything.

'We're James and Sirius,' said Pumpkin Pasty, not giving any clue as to which he was.

'Why don't you want to talk to us?'

'Don't you understand English?'

'Think you're too good for us?'

Severus sat perfectly still, not responding.

'Perhaps,' said Bubble Gum, 'his ears are so clogged with dirt he can't hear us.' He laughed at his own joke. Pumpkin Pasty echoed him, and Bubble Gum continued, 'Or -'

But Severus did not wait to hear their next suggestion. With his wand concealed, he pointed it at Bubble Gum, gauging his position from the reflection in the window, and whispered, 'Urticaria.'

'What?' said Pumpkin Pasty.

For a moment nothing happened. Then, in the reflection, Severus saw Bubble Gum scratch his face, then his arm. He twitched.

'What's wrong, Sirius?' asked Pumpkin Pasty.

Bubble Gum - Sirius - grimaced and said nothing, continuing to scratch at his arm. Red lines were appearing on his face. He drew his own wand and pointed it at Severus.

'What did you do?' he demanded. 'Take it off!' But he lowered his wand to continue his furious scratching, and Pumpkin Pasty - James - took up the fight.

'Aculeatus,' Severus before James could get his word in, and the boy cried out, dropping the uneaten half of his pasty and dancing about in agony.

Unnoticed by Severus, the commotion had woken Remus Lupin.

'What's going on?' he called, drawing his own wand.

Sirius was recovering enough to hold his wand steady, and he tried to cast a Jelly-Legs Jinx on Severus, but as Severus had remained in his seat it had little effect and only made him feel a bit weak at the knees. He felt a sense of triumph. These were soft, spoiled boys, who had never had to hold their own in a serious spell-fight before.

So he was taken unawares when Sirius, discarding wands for more practical methods of attack, dragged him off the seat and onto the floor, and began to pummel him, knocking his wand from his hand with his first swipe. Severus tried to fight back, but Sirius was taller and heavier than he was, and maddened with itching. Severus could do nothing but curl up tightly to shield his head. He made no sound.

Shouting voices penetrated through the familiar hailstorm of blows - James urging his friend on, and Remus trying to make them stop. Finally he felt someone dragging Sirius off him, and for a moment he lay panting and trying not to cry. Then he reached out blindly for his wand. A foot trod heavily on his hand, and he cried out.

'No more magic, dirtbag,' said Sirius from somewhere above him.

Severus sat up dizzily and cradled his hand against his chest, tears of pain now leaking down the side of his nose. The Itching Hex seemed to have worn off Sirius - he hadn't said the word loudly enough, a calm part of Severus' mind pointed out - but James was still flinching from the Cactus Curse, and that pleased him. He blew his nose on his sleeve.

'Eeew, that's disgusting,' said Sirius at once.

'It's your own fault, Severus,' said Remus, standing beside James and looking at him with righteous dismay. 'You shouldn't have cursed them in the first place.'

'You shouldn't have tried anything on us,' said Sirius, who was surveying him with a very smug face. 'What did you say his name was? Snivellus?'

'Severus,' Remus said quietly, but his lips twitched.

'Ah, Snivellus, that's what I thought.' He bent down to pick up the wand. Severus made another dive for it with his good hand but wasn't quick enough. 'You need a wash.'

James nodded vigorously. He drew his own wand and said, 'I know a good spell, I've seen my mum do it a million times.' He smirked. 'I can tell your mum doesn't know it, Snivellus. It's like this: Scourgify!'

A squirt of what looked like shampoo shot from the end of his wand and splashed on the floor at his feet. James stared at it in disappointment. It was Severus' turn to smirk.

'Not very good, is it? I bet you've only just got your wand. I've had mine two years already.'

'Shut up,' James snapped, and repeated the spell more loudly. This time the shampoo reached Severus' face and splattered there, stinging his eyes so that they watered again. He rubbed at them frantically, wiping his face on the hem of his robes. His eyes watered more fiercely than before.

James and Sirius both laughed. Sirius turned to Remus, who was watching with faint amusement. 'Come on, mate, you're not staying here, you'd die from the stink. Get your stuff.'

In the doorway, Sirius tossed Severus' wand back into the compartment contemptuously. 'I'm not keeping this, it's filthy,' he said. 'Bye, Snivellus!'

To another chorus of laughter, the three departed before Severus could reclaim his wand. For a moment he considered dashing after them, but caught sight of his reflection in the glass of the compartment door. He had a black eye, smears of shampoo over his face and on his robes, and one of his sleeves was coming apart. The sight was so dispiriting that he didn't even bother collecting his wand for a few minutes.

The dropped pasty half still lay on the floor, crumbling. Severus eyed it for a while, pride and hunger warring in him. Finally and reluctantly he let it lie. Snapes didn't take charity, even unintended charity, and especially not from an enemy. He sat back on his seat and mechanically tried to clean himself, conceal the rips and the stains and the dirt. But most of all he wiped his face over and over again to remove every trace of his tears. He would never let himself show such weakness again.

THE END

Blaise
Oxford
29th October 2004