Runaway

Runaway

A songfic to "I Will Remember You" by Sarah McLachlan

It was a dark, dreary, dismal day, and I all I could bare to do was stare out my window, wishing that I could somehow wish myself back to my love. Ugh, I hated my aunt. I had never hated anyone so much in my life. Just when my life was beginning to turn back around, she ripped me away from the one person I loved.

One week before my wonderful fifth year was going to end, my world came crashing down. It was a Tuesday, and I was at lunch when I was unexpectedly called down to professor McGonagall's office. At first, my heart was racing. I thought my worst fear had been confirmed... I had failed a final. I thought I was prepared for the worst, but I obviously wasn't. McGonagall's concerned face worried me even further. I'll never forget the words that she uttered.

"Hermione, I- I- I don't know how to say this, but I'm afraid that something terrible has happened," the professor explained. "I honestly don't know how to tell you this."

"Oh no! I knew it! I knew I did horribly on my Muggle Studies' final!" (What a fool I was.)

A tear ran down professor McGonagall's cheek, and she shook her head. This was a side of her that I hadn't seen before. "I'm afraid something much worse has happened. Hermione, there has been an accident."

Much worse? What could be worse? "What kind of an accident? Did they lose my test or something? What happened?"

"This has nothing to do with school, Hermione, this is about your parents."

My parents? It was easy to see that McGonagall was trying her hardest not to cry in front of me. "What has happened? Are they alright?" I asked frantically.

"I regret to inform you that your parents have been involved in a car accident... Hermione, they didn't survive," she said in a near whisper.

I couldn't believe what she had just said. I heard the words, but I just couldn't comprehend what they meant. A few seconds later, the words hit me. "You're kidding... please say you're kidding... nooooo!" I started to cry uncontrollably, and I broke down in front of McGonagall. She told me that she was terribly sorry, and she hugged me. After a half of hour of continuous tears, she was still trying to convince me that everything was going to be all right, but I knew it wasn't. Lunch was nearly over, so I asked if I could be dismissed to go back to my room early so that I could avoid everyone.

"I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories"

Professor McGonagall escorted me to the Gryffindor common room. "Hermione, if you don't feel up to it, I'll give you permission to skip your classes for the rest of the semester. However, if you do go, it may help to take your mind off your troubles. If you need someone to talk to, remember that I'm always here. I hope you feel better, Hermione, I truly am sorry." I still could not pull myself together to say anything, so she let me be.

Soon after professor McGonnagal's left, however, I could hear the other Gryffindors coming back from lunch. I ran up to my bed, where I cried myself to sleep.

I woke up early the next morning, praying that the whole ordeal had been nothing but a bad dream. Unfortunately, I came back to reality. It was all too real to have been a dream. I decided to take McGonagall's advice, and try to attend my classes. I hurried to the bathroom, but was afraid to look into the mirror. When I did, I became even more depressed. My eyes were red, puffy, and swollen from all of the crying. Hoping that they would return to their normal size, I took a shower and got dressed. The redness had gone down a bit, but I still looked like I had been through hell.

By the time I was ready to start my miserable day, some of the other Gryffindors were starting to wake up. I went down to the common room, and saw Harry sitting on the couch. Harry and I had been going out for about five months, and although I loved him more than anything, I couldn't bear to explain to him what had happened. My body had reached its limit, and I just couldn't cry anymore. I quietly tried to go back to my bed, but I was too late. Harry had already noticed me, and he looked quite concerned.

"Hermione!" called Harry.

"Hi Harry," I answered despondently. I had no choice. I sat down next to him.

"Are you all right? McGonagall explained to me what happened; and after I couldn't find you yesterday, I was worried sick about you. I'm so sorry, Hermione." Harry put his arms around me, which made me feel a bit better. As long as I had Harry, I knew that I could pull through. I knew that he cared about me, and I just wanted to stay in his arms forever. "I love you, Hermione, remember that."

"I love you too, Harry."

* * *

I had managed to pull through my morning classes with minimal crying. All of my teachers took me aside and expressed their concern, even Snape. Thursday, at lunch, I received an owl. When I opened it, I was shocked to notice that it was from Aunt Martha. Why would she send something? She never gave a damn about me. She hated me because I was a witch... or, in her words, a "freak". It read:

Dear Hermione,

I've been informed of your parent's unfortunate death, and I'm sorry for your loss. However, I'm sending this to inform you that I am your godmother, and, therefore, am now legally responsible for you.

"What? My godmother? No! This can't be! I didn't know I had a godmother," I said to myself. Despite my disappointment, I read on:

I will be at the train station to pick you up, and I have set up a room for you.

~ Aunt Martha

P.S. - I suggest that you dispose of your magical stuff now, and say goodbye to your little friends, because I will not tolerate any of that nonsense under this roof. Please also inform your teachers that you will not be returning to that stupid school next year.

This sent me into tears, once again.

"Hermione, what's wrong? Did something else just happen?" Harry asked in his concerned voice.

I was still in shock and couldn't bring myself to say anything, so I simply handed him the note.

His jaw dropped, and a tear ran down his cheek.

The pain was merely unbearable, so I ran back to the common room. A few minutes later, I realized that Harry was chasing after me, so I waited for him.

We silently walked into the deserted common room. It would be empty for at least another hour, so we had time to talk, alone.

I hated myself for putting Harry through this. Actually, I hated my aunt for putting us both through this. Just when Harry and I became close, this had to happen. This would be our final night together, and I wanted us to have a perfect moment together with him in case I never saw him again.

"Hermione, I can't bear to think what I'll do without you."

"I can't bear to think what I'll do without you, either. But let's not try to think about that right now. This may be the last time we'll ever have to be alone."

I leaned against him. "Let's go up to my room."

I noticed the intrigued expression on his face. "All right," he said. Our chances to be alone and physical were few and far between, so I was hoping to take advantage of this time we had together.

We walked upstairs, and I sat on my bed, took off my shoes, and sat back against the pillows. I looked at him and smiled. He smiled back. Then we were lying next to each other, and his hands were reaching around my sides, as I kissed him.

The idea that Harry was lying on my bed went right to my head, and then all thoughts fled as we kissed deeply, our mouths joined, our bodies pressed together. I had always loved everything about him and my troubles flew from my mind as I listened to his tiny whimpers of pleasure, and I felt his excitement, quite literally. I leaned into him, deepening our kiss.

"Remember the good times that we had?
I let them slip away from us when things got bad
How clearly I first saw you smilin' in the sun
Wanna feel your warmth upon me, I wanna be the one"

"Harry," I said, pulling my mouth away from his.

I laughed when he responded with a "Mmm," and his head followed my lips as I pulled away. I placed my hands on his chest and playfully pushed him down. "What, love?" He looked dreamily into my eyes and gave me that adorable half smile that I couldn't resist.

"Harry, I want us to make love," I whispered, glancing at his mouth. "I'm ready." I noticed Harry's jaw drop slightly. Frankly, I had even surprised myself by saying that.

He swallowed, smiled, and gave me a look as if to say, "Who are you and what have you done with Hermione?" In a voice of disbelief, he said," You want to..."

He couldn't believe it... I giggled. "Don't you?" As I glanced down, I noticed that his excitement was no longer subtle... I took that as a "yes."

I took off my blouse, and was again on top of Harry. He pulled me closer and kissed me as he undid my bra. I worked on undressing his lower half, so that I could fondle him. Eventually, we worked our way under my blankets, and I managed to slip out of my skirt. Harry sat up momentarily to take off his shirt. This time, Harry was on top of me, and I instinctively slipped off my last article of clothing, and hooked one leg over his side, curling around him. We pressed up against each other, and I gave a tiny gasp followed by anxious little "mm, mm, mms," as we got as close as we could possibly get to one another. As we settled into what seemed like a hypnotic rhythm, I closed my eyes and felt Harry's hand brush back my hair, feel my face, trace my lips, reach my neck, and slow at my curves. We kissed again, feeling how right it was, how incredible.

In the ecstasy of it all, my thoughts wandered. I was thinking about Harry, how we were one, how this moment was perfect. I wanted to stay with him in that moment forever. Then, I thought about how impossible it would be. Reality cam crashing back at me, but I tried to fight it. I just needed this last moment with Harry.

"I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories"

I breathed as I felt his tongue tickling my ear. This was so perfect. I was there with Harry, who I loved and wanted so much. I clutched his arm hard and pushed myself against him. Then, I heard someone coming.

"Harry! Harry, stop!" I pushed him off of me, and uncovered him. We needed to hurry.

His eyes were wide. "Did I- is something wrong?"

After drooling over the sight of Harry, and trying to get my upper half to stop my lower half from leaping on him, I answered, "No! It's just that someone is coming! We need to get dressed!

Grinning, he said, "Bloody hell, they can watch if they want, I don't care." I laughed, and hoped that he was joking. Unfortunately, he wasn't. He pinned me back down, and I had to fight even harder not to agree with him.

"Harry! We can't! We need to get dressed!" Harry apologized and got off of me. We quickly got dressed, and I nearly pushed my love down the stairs trying to hurry him along. Just as he reached the common room, Gryffindors were starting to walk in. Harry tried to act casual, (and by tried I mean he was absolutely giddy the rest of the afternoon,) and he went off to his afternoon classes. I, however, decided to stay.

"I'm so tired but I can't sleep
Standin' on the edge of something much too deep
It's funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside, but we can't be heard"

Life without Harry would be bleak, miserable, depressing. I thought about this and cried for what seemed like forever. At one point, I heard other Gryffindors coming in to go to bed. I envied and somewhat hated the others because they had no idea what pain was. Emotional pain, anyway. I couldn't sleep.

* * *

The next thing I remember is the sun rising. I got out of bed, and took a shower. There were no classes today, so after I got ready, I packed up my stuff. I decided against going to the announcement of the House Cup. Instead, I tried to get some sleep before my life completely ended.

"But I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories"

I dreamt of Harry. My dream started off in complete darkness. Slowly, I began to recognize my surroundings. I looked around, and I realized that I was in my wicked aunt's house. The windows were barred. I felt like I was in a prison. In my dream, I closed my eyes. But when I opened them, I was no longer in a house. Again, I was in complete darkness. But this time, I could see a tiny ball of light from far away. I ran towards it as fast as I could, and ended up running into bars, much like the ones on my window, but much larger. They were so large that I was able to squeeze through them, and I noticed that the ball of light was actually a fire. This dream just kept getting weirder by the second. I had no idea what the hell it meant. Then, I was awakened by a voice. It was Harry, he was looking for me.

"Hermione," my love called. I wished that I could continue the dream to see what it meant, but I wanted to see Harry more. I ran down the stairs to see what he wanted. "Hermione, there you are! I was looking for you all day. We'd better hurry, because the train is going to leave in ten minutes!"

"Shit! I slept that long? Wow! That's ok, I'll be right there. My stuff is already packed, anyway." I ran back up the stairs, grabbed my bags, and ran back down. Harry and I ran to catch the train, and he helped me carry my bags. After saying our goodbyes to everyone, we sat together on the train, making sure we had a seat all to ourselves. I didn't have the time to tell anyone that I wouldn't' be there next year. Besides, for some reason, I still had high hopes.

I spent the ride home resting in Harry's arms. Again, he told me he loved me, and that, somehow, we would see each other again.

"I'm so afraid to love you, but more afraid to loose
Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose
Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light"

I must have fallen asleep in Harry's arms, because the next thing I remember is the train coming to a halt. I didn't want to leave, but I knew what I had to do next. I tried my hardest not to cry as Harry and I said our final goodbyes, but my efforts were useless.

"And I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories"

Even Harry was crying, and Ron had to pull him off of me. It was actually quite funny, thinking about it now. Our shoulders drenched with tears, we left. Harry followed Ron, and I spotted a woman that was watching me. I guessed that she was my aunt. She came over to me, and motioned for me to follow her to her car. I did, not wanting to argue with anyone at the moment.

I had never been to my aunt's house, so I didn't know where it was or how long it would take to get there. I imagined it to be some kind of prison or mental institution. I didn't know why she was so evil. Maybe she was some kind of devil-worshipper who got off on making other people's lives miserable. What right did she have to run my life like this? On the way to her house, I fell asleep again, and the dream came back. The beginning was the same, but I got further through the dream this time. After I realized that the ball of light was actually a fire, I acted on an impulse and ran towards it. I can't explain why, but it just felt like the right thing to do. As I ran closer, the fire looked like a bon fire. There were rocks surrounding it. In fact, I noticed that this fire had been magically started. It was still dark, and I noticed numerous trees around me. I was in some kind of a forest. Then, before I reached the fire, I ran into a door. There was writing on the door, but it was too dark to read it. However, I did recognize a "t" and what I thought looked like a "w." Then, the door opened, and I heard someone say my name.

Then, I woke up. My aunt had slammed her door and gotten out of the car. She opened my door, and I nearly fell out.

"Wake up, stupid," my loving aunt told me. "Get your damn bags out of my car, and follow me."

I did as I was told. I noticed that her house was in the country, surrounded by lots of foliage. This area seemed familiar for some reason. I followed her into her house. It was a one-level house, and quite small, probably because she was alone and would always be. She did, however, have a guest room. It looked as though she never had guests, because everything was dusty. I walked in, and slammed the door in her face. I don't think I actually hit her, but I heard her screaming at me. Luckily, I locked the door before she had the chance to open it again. We certainly got off to a good start. I knew that she was an evil bitch, and she now she knew that I wasn't going to put up with her shit. I put my bags down, and sat on the bed. As I looked around, I was astonished to see that this room was the same exact room that was in my dream. The room had a gloomy glow to it, probably because it only had one window. It didn't have bars on it, but it felt like a prison all the same. It was almost dark, so I found a lamp and started to unpack my stuff. In my bag, I came across a picture of my parents, as well as a picture of Harry. I didn't trust these out in the open, so I hid them under my mattress. Memories came rushing back to me.

"And I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Weep not for the memories"

Not having any more energy, I dusted off the window with an old sweater of mine, turned off the light, and lied down. Everything was dark. However, when I looked out the window, I noticed a tiny ball of light! Just like the one in my dream! I began to think that the dream was trying to tell me something, maybe how to change things. I went for it. The night air was cold, and it was still raining, so I turned on the lamp and quietly changed into some warmer clothes. I turned off the lamp, got my shoes on, and walked over the window. I was disappointed to see that it only opened less than halfway, but I managed to squeeze through. I closed the window, and ran as fast as I could from that hellhole. Then, I noticed the fire. It must have been magically started. How else could it be burning so brightly in the rain? My hopes rose at this thought, hoping that the starters of the fire would understand and help me. Except for the fire, I couldn't see anything. However, I did feel the trees around me. I was in a forest! This was exactly like the dream! Filled with anticipation, I ran even faster. I was so caught up in the moment that I forgot I was about to run into a door. I just kept on running, until I ran into it. When I regained my balance, I noticed a sign on the door, and sure enough, the "t" and the "w" were there. The door opened, and I heard someone say my name.

"Hermione? Is it really you? Bloody hell! Where did you come from?" Harry said.

"Harry!" I jumped into his arms. I was soaked, and I got him all wet, but he didn't seem to mind. I heard Ron mumbling something in the background. Then, I realized that the sign on the door said, "The Weasleys." It all made sense. My aunt lived near the Weasleys. Ron showed up at the door, his mouth stuffed with a marshmallow.

"Hamainia!" He swallowed, then he smiled and said, "Hermione!" Then he ran somewhere, and came back with a few towels. While I dried off, Harry went to get me some of his dry clothes to wear, since Ginny's were too small. After I changed and dried off, Harry took me in his arms and we sat on the couch, while I explained to him and Ron what had happened. They were mostly amazed at my premonition, since I always thought that Divination class was a load of crap.

In the end, after hearing my story, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley gladly invited me to spend the summer at their house. I stayed in Ginny's room, and my aunt was more than happy to get rid of me. Things turned out after all. I wondered if it was meant to be that I didn't say goodbye to anyone at Hogwart's, because I was surely returning there next year.

"Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories"