Guilt

- - - Guilt - - -

    When he came and said, "I'll free you," none believed him. We glided as unemotionally as always throughout the incoherent babblings, deranged thoughts, and screams of insanity and death. Oh how did this place reek of such things. Haunting tormented thought plague all the minds here.

"I'll free you." Never had such an untrue statement been spoken aloud. It was almost laughable. What could possibly free us from what has eaten at our souls? Ripped apart our flesh? Left us little more than living zombies seeking nothing more than a little happiness? Nothing. Like I said, it was almost laughable.

A new screaming voice enter our home, terrifying to those not used to it. The voice was full of pure fear and I could almost see the streams of tear running down its' face as it tried its' hardest to get away. With dying little flickerings, it thought of happiness.

In a flash I saw bits and pieces of my old life, a life I had long since tried to leave behind. Soft strawberry-blonde hair. Smiling hazel eyes. Toes barely touching the tops of yellow wheat fields. Fingers and lips freezing in cold snow fronts. Warmth then coldness.

All of the horrorstricken's voice happy thought were gone. Its' worst replaced them. They were very sad thoughts. More flashes of my life came over me. Messy strawberry-blonde hair. Hazel eyes rolled up. Blood. Blood. So much blood. On him. On the walls. How could someone have so much blood? No warmth. Just coldness.

'It won't last too long,' one of my kin thought sadistically. We didn't care about the voices or th screams. We couldn't. Guilt was all that ran through us. We fed off the thoughts of people around us. We fed out their happiness, trying to get rid of the guilt; trying to figure out what we did in out old lives to deserve this.

"I'll free you." Never had such an untrue, but so desired statement been spoken aloud. "I'll free you." It echoed to us as we glided across the dead floors, beside the decaying walls and alongside the cells, guarding the prisoners of the Azkaban.

"I'll free you."

-

    "Pink! Pink! Look at this!" Oh God. It's happening again. "Pink? Are you mad at me? I'm sorry. What can I do honestly, Pink? So useless. Partners? Sure! Pink. Pink? I can see the pleading hazel eyes in front of me. They're not really there though. I scream 'Stop it!' with a voice that no longer exists. I cringed but my body moves as ghost-like as ever. My mind and body have been detached for as long as I can remember.

He's still there. Waiting. Stll waiting. Probably for me to address him. I would but I can't. I don't remember him, just the bad things that surround him. Like blood. Lost of blood. There he is. Dead, bleeding. Dead with blood. I scream once again, no voice comes out. A voiceless cry. My body continues acting its' own. Why is this happening to me? What did I do to deserve this? No one sould live this.

And he's still there, just because I can't forget him! I won't figure him. I know nothing of him, just his strawerry-blonde hair, hazel eyes and fragments of the past that will never leave me.

Simply because the guilt I feel is too much to let it and him go.

"Pink! I love you, Pink. I'm so happy." His sweet smile burns into my mind. 'Just shut up!' I cry, no tears. Such a creature has no use for such.

- - -

    Here, it's happy. It's familiar. He was here. I was too. My scattered memories form so much better, so much happier here. I like it. "Pink! Why are you so sad? It's beautiful out! As beautiful as you! Don't laugh. Corny? Please. It's the truth, sweetheart. Pink? Don't listen to them. They're stupid! And jealous! Just stupid and jealous. Forget them! What? Of course I'm right? I'm Abel, ain't I? Pink. I love you. Always remember that. Please," then, there's blood. Lights. Shouts. Hatred. Utter hatred. "Hiding Black"? Was I looking for someone? Just Abel, my Abel.

Something drivens me back. Abel, covered in blood. People, blaming me. Was it my fault? No, it couldn't have been.

There's too much blood.

- - -

    Patrolling. More happiness. It doesn't reek of insanity and death.

"Pink? Wow. An O! Pink? Cain said what? Of course not. What? Why? Really? Let's just have fun, like at home. Pink! Let's make snow fronts. Pink. Come on. It's just for fun, and you're really good. Pink. Don't be like that. Pink. Pink! Come on! I didn't mean it! Pink! Please! Pink! I love you. Don't be like this. Pink..." He's so sad, sniffling, tears running down his face in huge globs. Warmth. Abel. Sleeping. Guilty. Can I do no right? Can I, Abel?

It's cold again.

- - -

    A soul. Slipping through my mouth. A rush of an emotions. A burst of happiness. The clearest clear.

Him. Abel. Standing. My lover. My best friend, my only friend. Fourth year. Me. Pink. His mentor. His true love, his only love. Sixth year. Dueling. We were dueling. That bastard Cain. Wrong incantation. Abel bleeding. Everyone gasping. People screaming. At me. Accused. I couldn't understand. Why wasn't Abel moving? Why was there so much blood? Abel? Abel? Speak. Speak. Speak! Say something! Abel! Abel! Please! Don't die! Don't you dare die, you bitch! Don't leave! Abel! Don't leave me! Abel! Please. Dear God. Abel. Please. Don't...

What have I done?

The soul is gone, devored, no longer filling the empty voides of my forgotten life.

A boy. Bleeding. Dead. Strawberry-blonde hair. Hazel eyes rolled up. Unknown to me, a dementor, a container of guilt, a creature of evil.

My once-been life is blank and the cycle begins again.

"Pink. Pink?" Pleading hazel eyes. I cringed. No movement. I cry. No tears, no voice.

Such a creature has no use of such things.

- - -

When he came, he said, "I'll free you." I'll free you.

And we joined him, Lord Voldemort, believing what he said.

I'll free you.

Our one true desire; to be free.

- - END - -