Jessie

Jessie

Everyone knew whom she was--the sister to the Boy Who Lived--and everyone knew her name: Jessie. Jessie Potter, twin sister to the Boy Who Lived, making her the Girl Who Lived. Yet the limelight was focused on Harry. I don't understand it myself, perhaps it's because he was found in the rubble first and she nearly died. Or maybe it was because she was with Sirius right before the attack, making it seem more likely that it was just Harry Voldemort was after that night. Remus was late that night in taking Harry away from Lily and James, and Sirius had something pressing that he had to attend to and couldn't keep Jessie. If Remus had been on time that night, both children would have been fine....

Because Sirius had brought Jessie back just before Voldemort's attack was another reason Crouch threw him into Azkaban without a trial. Why would the man protecting the Potters take one of the children only to return it just before the attack if he did not wish for the whole family to be eliminated?

While it truly was Harry that Voldemort was after that night, Jessie was the most harmed. Harry had been able to go to his aunt and uncle directly after the incident, but Jessie was rushed to St. Mungo's where she spent a whole year in the Intensive Care ward before, like Harry, being dropped on the Dursleys' doorstep.

It is true that Harry had a horrid childhood. Though, as he will be the first to make clear to everyone, there is someone who had far worse. Harry was allowed a degree of freedom while in his aunt and uncle's care. Jessie, on the other hand, was locked away from all human contact. She spent her days and nights in the basement, only eating when Harry was able to sneak food down to her.

Apparently even Dumbledore was surprised at Jessie's appearance and mental health when she showed with Hagrid just before the start of our first year. The Dursleys had left her behind when they ran from the 'letters from no one' and the half-giant had gone to retrieve her before he went after Harry.

She'd been here a few weeks before any of us students arrived.

In the last five years, she's only talked to two people: Harry and myself. Dumbledore was forced to give her a room of her own to stop the panic attacks. She eats all of her own meals in that room and only comes out for lessons with a very very strong calming potion running through her system. Even with the potion she's still scared of people. She sits in a corner during every lesson.... If only there was some way to comfort her....

If only there was some way to make her see that not everyone is as vile as their damned aunt and uncle are. If only I could make her see that what the Dursleys have done to her was horrible and unacceptable.

Those people should be shot.

"'Mione, what's up?" Harry asked, bringing me back to breakfast and the noisy, mindless chatter of those around us.

"Jessie," I answered.

The pained look crossed his features as it always does when his sister is mentioned. It's the look that says that he believes that he should have been able to stop them. It says that he will never forgive them and he will never forget. That look says that, someday, he will seek his revenge on his aunt and uncle for the wrongs they have done to his sister. It's the look that says he wishes he could help her, but he knows he can't.

Ron looked at us curiously. "What about her?" he asked. Ron has never been closer than three feet to Jessie, but he is quite smitten with her. The thought makes me laugh a little, though somehow I know that he will never be close enough to her for her to consider him as anything more than her brother's best friend. I wonder if that's how she thinks of me....

"It's nothing really," I said softly. "I was just thinking about what has happened to her."

"You don't know the half of it, Hermione," Harry informed me. "What we've told you...it's nothing compared to what we've left out."

Ron stared at us, confusion written all over his face. He had no idea of the horrors of Jessie's past, and now I've just found out that I've only been let into the shadows of the truth. If what I know isn't anywhere near what has been kept from me...it makes me hate the Dursleys even more.

Neither Harry nor I ate anymore of our breakfast that morning. Instead, we each occupied ourselves by pushing the food around our plates with our forks. Thank Merlin it was a Saturday. I don't think I'd be able to concentrate on my lessons knowing this....

I wished she would come out to the Great Hall once in a while. I think it would be good for her. But the calming potions that Snape keeps brewing for her (I think his job depends on it) are only good enough for her classes, not for the thousands of people dining in the Great Hall on a daily basis.

I rose from the table and made my way to the tower, weaving in and out of students as I did so. I took a few secret passageways to make the trip back shorter, for some reason feeling as though people were just the worst thing in the world at the moment. Blame it on the Dursleys.

I sighed as I gave the password to the Fat Lady and entered the blissfully empty common room. Outside, the weather was cool, crisp, and clear, probably one of the last of the year, and most of the students were outside enjoying it.

I heard a sigh of relief from the corner of the room that caused me to turn. There I saw the raven locks and depressingly dull eyes of Jessie Potter, Harry's twin. I smiled slightly and went to her.

"How are you?" I asked, sitting across from her. I knew better than to get too close to her, she would freak out, and then Harry'd kill me. It took months just to get her to let me this close, and months again for her to trust me without Harry being in the room. I was not about to ruin that now.

"I think I'm getting better," she said softly. Her voice was always soft. If there were too many people around (and she wasn't freaking out) one would have to strain to hear her. "I made it through an entire class period without a calming potion," she confessed.

I smiled brightly. "That's wonderful!" I praised. She smiled a smile that soon left. They always did.... Seeing her smile...it was such a rare occurrence that it could brighten my whole month if I caused it. This one...this one was my doing.

"I'm going to try two classes soon," she informed me. "I want to be cured of this...whatever this is, but I want to do it the hard way. I can't keep using these damn potions all my life; I'll never get any better. I can't have a spell do it either, for the same reason. It's like putting a Band-Aid over a bullet wound, you know?"

I nodded. "I know," I agreed.

"And I don't really want to be alone anymore," she confessed. "So I'm going to go to the headmaster and ask for a roommate. My choices are severely limited--only you and Harry--but...I can't go into one of the dorms yet...I wouldn't last the night and I know that."

I was honored to be on that list, no matter how short it was.

"Will you come with me?" she asked. "I've been trying to get myself to go for about an hour now and every time I get too close to the portrait hole, I clam up because of all the voices on the other side. I can't go alone, no matter what I want."

I nodded and stood. I would help her help herself if it was the last thing I ever did.

I held out my hand to help her up, not entirely sure if she would take it or not. Her increasing courage was probably the reason the Sorting Hat put her here, in Gryffindor. Who knows if she'd have come this far if she had been on her own anywhere else. Slytherins wouldn't help her, they're all too self-centered and greedy (except for one) and the Hufflepuffs would probably drive her insane by being around her too much. The Ravenclaws would probably just leave her alone, after all, they've got much more important things to do, such as study.

She reached up and took my offered hand. I felt elated at the courage she was showing and that she was trusting me. I masked this with a weak attempt at a not-so-goofy smile, but I could feel the grin span from ear to ear. I was proud of her, and I'm sure that Harry would be too, if he were here.

She held onto my hand the entire way to the unicorn statue that guarded the entrance to Dumbledore's office, tightening her grip whenever we came across a particularly large group of people. I don't think she noticed, but when we passed the Great Hall, Harry, Ron, and Draco were coming out. Harry smiled at us.

I didn't know the password to the Headmaster's office, but Jessie did, being the frequent visitor that she was. She whispered the word to the unicorn and it stepped aside, granting us access to the spiral staircase I had only traveled up once before.

She continued to hold onto my hand as we were taken up the stairs and as she knocked on the door that served as both barrier and entrance to the office of Hogwart's great Headmaster.

The door opened and we walked in. Dumbledore stood behind his desk with his back to us. "Jessie," he said before turning around. When he did, his eyebrows raised a little in surprise. "And Miss Granger, nice to see you. How may I be of assistance?" he asked, turning towards Jessie.

"I-I want a roommate," she whispered. "I c-can't go into a--a dormitory yet...but...I-I don't much feel like--like being alone anymore."

"Would you feel comfortable with Miss Granger here as a roommate?" he asked with a very pronounced twinkle in his blue eyes.

Jessie nodded. "I-I would like that v-very much, sir," she answered.

Dumbledore looked at me next. "And you, Miss Granger?" he asked. "Would you be so kind as to share a room with this wonderful young lady?"

"I would be honored, sir," I answered softly.

Another smile crossed Jessie's face. I had caused her to smile for the second time that day. One more and I would be set for a lifetime.

"Alright," the headmaster beamed, clapping his hands together. "Miss Granger, you will find your things in Jessie's room tonight. I hope you both enjoy your choice."

Harry was amazed with the recent development his sister had made and overjoyed with our new living arrangement. He hugged us both, whispering a heart-felt thank you in my ear for being there for Jessie.

"So that's what you were doing earlier?" he asked. "You were going to talk to Dumbledore about this?"

Jessie shrugged. Ron's presence was greatly subduing what I had witnessed earlier.

"You can trust him," Harry and I said at the same time. Perhaps we were both picking up on the same thing.

"I'm trying," she whispered apologetically. "Really, I am."

Smiling sympathetically, I brushed a lock of her black-as-night hair away from her face. I noticed that Harry had an odd look on his face as I did so, but I didn't think anything of it.

And she smiled again! I could feel the goofy grin spreading over my face again and didn't even try to stop it. I knew there would be not way for me to hide my joy this time.

Knowing that I had caused three smiles from this wonderful woman in the same day...I could go a lifetime without ever seeing another one, though I'd rather not. Her whole face transformed when she smiled. It seemed to glow with an inner light and her eyes shined and sparkled...just like emeralds. I never thought I'd see the day when I was the one to make her smile.

Jessie left for bed an hour or so later. I sighed as I watched her walk down the hall to her room--our room.

Harry began to laugh.

Startled, I stared at Harry. What was so hilarious? What was he laughing at?

"Dear Merlin, Hermione, I can't believe it," he said, still laughing.

"What?" I demanded.

"You fancy my sister," Harry said with a smirk. Thank Merlin his voice was low enough that the few people on the other side of the common room couldn't hear. Ron turned his attention away from Jessie's direction to Harry with a look that clearly stated that he thought Harry was insane. Ron didn't know.

"Are you sure?" I asked, chewing my bottom lip.

Harry nodded. "Remember how I was before Draco and I started dating?" he asked. "You said I had this lovestruck look on my face all the time. Well, guess whose got it now?"

"But 'Mione's not...are you?" Ron asked. Shyly I nodded. I hadn't come out to very many people about my sexuality, in fact Harry and Jessie were about the only two who knew, and now Ron was at the bottom of the very short list.

"I can't believe it," Ron muttered. He slouched back into the chair he was sitting in. "Am I the only straight person in our year?" he asked.

Harry and I nodded. "Pretty much," Harry said. "Neville might be though," he said thoughtfully. "I dunno though, he never says anything about guys or girls."

"Ginny, remember?" I asked.

"Oh, right," Harry nodded.

"And Lav's straight, much to Parvarti's dismay. Before Lav shot her down, she was begging for a date. I think Padma's straight though," I said thoughtfully. "I'm not sure though. She could be bi...with the way Parv was talking about her last week." I shrugged and let Ron sit in disbelief before he finally stood and made his way upstairs.

"If it makes you feel any better, Hermione," Harry said after a while, "Jess fancies you as well."

"What?" I asked, shocked.

"That's why she trusts you so much," he said, looking away from the staircase that led to the boys' dormitory. "She really wants to give you a chance. Haven't you noticed that she only smiles when you're around?"

I shook my head. "I didn't, no," I confessed.

Harry chuckled. "Well, it's true."

She stayed behind Wednesday night after Astronomy was over. I was one of the last finishing up and putting my telescope away.

"Erm...'Mione?" she asked.

"Yes?" I asked, feeling the heat rise in my cheeks and thanking Merlin that it was a new moon and very dark.

"Harry said something the other day that I--that I wanted to--to--"

"What did Harry say?" I asked.

"He-he said...he said that you...thatyoufanciedme," she said quickly.

I was speechless. Harry could be so...so vile sometimes.

"I thought so," she said softly.

"No," I gasped. "No, no, Harry's right, Jessie," I said quickly. "It's just...I was...caught off guard...speechless, you know?" I asked, my voice far too high for my own liking. "That's all," I said quickly. "I was just surprised."

"But--but why, Hermione?" she asked. "What in the world could make you like me? I'm...dirty. Worthless, spoiled. I'm not...I don't deserve you."

"Merlin," I whispered, going to her and pulling her into my arms. "Don't you ever say that again," I ordered. "You're not worthless. You're not dirty, and you're not spoiled. I may not know all about your past, Jessie, but the only people to blame for what's happened to you are the Dursleys. I don't care about your past. You could be a convicted murderer and I would still love you. For six years I have known you, Jessie, and what I do know doesn't change the way I feel about you. In fact, it only makes it stronger."

"You mean it?" she asked.

I held her tighter. "With all my heart," I whispered. "Can I kiss you?" I asked, surprising even myself.

She nodded, and we kissed.

After that, things only got better. She was filled with more courage and self-esteem than ever before. She even started talking to Ron! Now she was working herself up into braving dinner with the rest of the school.

"I don't know if I can do this," she sighed for the fifth time in five minutes.

I sighed and suppressed a small chuckle. "Yes you can," I said, walking across the room to where she was pacing. I took her hand in mine. "See this?" I asked, indicating our laced fingers. "I won't let go of this," I promised. "I'll be right there with you the entire time. If things get too hard for you, we will leave, no questions asked. I promise."

"You promise you won't let go?" she asked.

"I swear on my life that I will never let you go. Besides, if anything happened to you, Harry'd kill me for sure."

Finally I got her to chuckle. "How will you eat?" she asked. "Can you eat one-handed?"

I shrugged. "It's worth a try," I said simply. "And if I have to, I just won't eat anything that requires cutting."

"Alright," she sighed. "Let's go."

Harry was, yet again, surprised by his sister's actions. Somehow, I thought he should have seen this coming. Then again, he was a guy, and guys can be very thick sometimes...no offence.

Jessie held onto my hand as though she would die if I let her go. I understood her reasoning, after all, she had decided against using a calming potion. She hadn't used one in two months. I had tried to talk her into using it tonight, knowing first hand how large the student body was, but she'd insisted, and, like Harry, once she's decided something, there's no changing her mind.

She started shaking midway through the meal and I decided it was about time to leave.

"We can go," I said softly. "If you want to."

She shook her head. "Not yet," she said shakily. "I-I want to try.... I have to do this."

"Jessie, you're shaking like a leaf," Harry said from across the table.

"He's right," Draco added, having decided to eat with us Gryffindors as the Slytherins weren't too fond of inter-House dating (especially when it came to Gryffindor and Slytherin). "Maybe you should--"

"No," Jessie said forcefully. "I'm not leaving yet. I have to do this now or I never will."

"Is your potion wearing off?" Harry asked.

I stared at my best friend in disbelief. "She's not taken that potion in two months, Harry," I informed him. "Didn't you know?"

Harry shook his head slowly. "Really?" he asked, his eyes shining, his voice breathless. "That's amazing!" he laughed. "Mum and dad would be so proud of you!"

"As would Sirius and Remus," I added. The two had adopted Jessie and Harry last year when Sirius was proven innocent after fifteen years of false guilt. It was about time. Thank Merlin that they did, seeing as how they may have saved my dear Jessie's life by doing so.

By the end of the winter, Jessie was cured of her social anxiety. She kept telling me that it was due to my unwavering support and love. What amazed me most, however, was the fact that she'd become somewhat of a social butterfly after emerging from her cocoon, all beautiful and perfect.... She was taking flight, and there was no stopping her.

Not that I wanted to, of course.

One day, nearing the Easter holidays, Harry came up to me and gave me a hug. It was entirely unexpected, so I asked him what it was for.

"For giving my sister wings to fly," he said, near tears. I wondered if he new I used that analogy myself to describe his sister. She truly was a miracle.

I later noticed that as Jessie became more open to people, Harry spent more time with his beloved Draco. But who was I to argue or criticize? The more time Harry spent with his fiancé meant that I had more time with my girlfriend.

That was time I had come to cherish. After a while, Jessie had opened up to me and began talking to me about her horrific past. Turns out that not only was she rejected, she had been abused and raped in ways that I didn't think existed, even in a person's worst nightmares.

Learning that...it had truly broken my heart. I understood, then, why she had called herself dirty and worthless in the past. I was filled with a bitter hatred of Petunia, Vernon, and Dudley Dursley; all of them should be locked in Azkaban with no chance of ever getting out. I wanted them to suffer a fate worse than death for what they did to my Jessie and her brother. No one hurts the people I love and gets away with it...ever.

I would find a way to make them pay.

Until then, however, I would keep helping my girlfriend in any way I could.

I watched her for a while as she sat on her bed doing her homework. I would miss her when the summer came. I would miss the privacy we got, sharing this room between the two of us--we were moving back into the dormitory tomorrow. I would miss a lot of things when everything changed again.

"It's very hard to concentrate with you staring at me like that, love," she informed me. "It's bad enough that I don't understand a thing about the stupid Patronus Charm, not one single thing! You know, maybe I should talk to Harry about it.... Do you know where he is?" she asked, finally looking up at me.

"With Draco," I answered. "What don't you understand?" I asked.

Professor Maseru had assigned the essay to see how well our class really understood the charm. We all--with the exception of Jessie--could cast the spell easily, thanks to Harry and the DA last year.

"How does it fight of the dementors?" she asked.

"Dementors feed on good emotions, right?" I asked. She nodded. "The Patronus Charm creates an endless supply of good emotions but can't feel despair. They distract dementors, giving time for a person to get away. And if the Patronus is really good, it can not only hold the dementor off, but also drive it away. Harry's Patronus can drive them away easily. So can Dumbledore's and Remus'. They're all very powerful wizards, so that's not surprising."

"And Maseru wants a three foot report on it?" she asked in disbelief.

I nodded. "What have you got so far?" I asked, walking over to her bed and sitting down to look at her report.

With the summer holidays approaching fast, most of our time was spent studying for Final Exams. It was depressing, especially as the others in our dormitory were always around, leaving no time for Jessie and I to actually be alone. Finally, we decided to do something about it.

We journeyed up to the very place Harry had taught us to perform the Patronus Charm--the Room of Requirement.

It was very cozy inside. A large four-poster with red hangings and silky coverings was located in the middle of the back wall, there was a fireplace opposite it, there were a few chairs in front of that, and an open window letting in cool night air and the light of the full moon outside.

Jessie looked around, admiring her work. "I've always been more of a hopeless romantic," she confessed. "Hope you don't mind."

"Not at all," I smiled. I rather liked this hopeless romantic side of the woman I loved.

"So?" she asked. "What do you think?"

"I like it," I said walking over to the bed. Reaching out a hand to the velvet hanging I looked back to her. "Why do you ask?"

Not saying a word, she walked up to me and undid the tie of my shirt, causing the neck to open a bit more. She then moved the shirt out of her way and began kissing the side of my neck. I gave into her, weakening at the knees and needing to at least sit down.

She's always been the more aggressive one when it comes to this....

She pushed me onto my back and kissed my lips with bruising force. My heartbeat rose so fast that I thought for a second that it would beat right out of me.

My breath came in ragged gasps as she broke the kiss to pull my shirt up over my head. Before she went for more, I was pulling her shirt off of her. She smiled.

Later, we lay in a tangled mess of limb and sheet, long past caring about academics or other students. The fact was this: we had each other, what more did we need? Grades, futures, Voldemort...none of it mattered at that moment. None of that existed inside of that room.

However, we both knew that as soon as we walked through that door, it would all end. Grades would matter once more, so would futures. Voldemort would be lurking in the shadows of our minds and show his ugly snake-like face and cause us to remember that this world was not a safe place and possibly never would be.

Voldemort would be the number one worry, especially since we were so close to Harry.

I sighed and ran my hand along the arm draped over my chest. My girl was beautiful, no one could disagree with that (and if they did, I'd have to hurt them), and I was continuously amazed that she had chosen me.

Would it change?

1 Year Later

It was graduation before Harry finally announced the truth behind the reason he and Draco had gotten engaged; it was us. Jessie and I. It was me getting her to become the person Harry had known was there all along but could never bring out. It was my giving her the wings to fly....

Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy were getting married in less than two weeks because of me. I wasn't sure if is should be happy about this, or saddened by it.

Jessie, of course, was thrilled that Harry was happy and had decided to marry--and with his reasoning. She said that if she had known what was holding them back, she would have tried sooner to overcome her social anxiety. Harry had said that he and Draco hadn't even considered it until we had begun dating.

Jessie was Harry's Best Woman at his wedding, I was her escort and Harry's only Groom's Maid. Ron was the only Groom's Man and the last person in Harry's line. Draco's line consisted of Best Man, Blaise Zabini, and two Groom's Men, Crabbe and Goyle (neither of which had really spoken to Draco since he told them about his relationship with Harry, but they really were the only people Draco knew well enough to put in his line).

Draco Malfoy-Potter had died two weeks later in the Final Battle.

As did Ginny, Ron, the eldest three Weasley boys (Bill, Charley, and Percy), Professor McGonagall, Dumbledore, Mad-Eye, Remus, and Voldemort. All of them, along with my soul.

I don't know what it was, exactly, that caused me to stop going on. I was alive, and yet I was dead inside. Perhaps a person can only see so much death and destruction before they themselves fall victim to Death's dark embrace. The last emotion I can remember feeling is relief. I saw Harry win, at the cost of his husband, and I was relieved that he had won. Then emptiness overtook me. I remember two tears had fallen from my eyes and then I passed out. There has been nothing since.

In the weeks that followed, I had become nothing more than a living statue. I had no words to say, no movements to make, no tears to cry...no love to feel.

I sat in our living room the morning of July 31, watching the flame of a candle, wishing that it could kindle the fire I'd felt as a schoolgirl. Harry, I could distantly hear, was spending the morning of his eighteenth birthday in tears. He wished that he, too, had died in that battle. Truth be told, so did I.

Jessie was the one thing that ensured the survival of the Man Who Defeated the Dark Lord and myself. Why she stayed...I'll never know. That was yet another thing I wished the candle flame would yield to me.

The woman in question entered the room, carrying a tray of food. She placed it near the candle and knelt before me, her face full of sorrow.

"Where are you?" she asked softly, gathering my limp hands in her own. "Where have you gone, my love?" Her voice shook, and it was that and that alone that took my full attention away from the candle. "Why did you leave me?" she asked. "Where did you go?" Tears fell from her eyes and I felt an emotion again. Regret. "Did I push you away?" she cried. "Did I push you away because I changed so much? Because I changed so quickly? Don't you love me anymore?"

Sobbing, she rest her head in my lap.

"I'm leaving," she whispered after a time. "I can't watch my brother live in agony and I can't see my savior die."

I felt tears fall down my face. I had known that this day would come from the beginning.

That didn't mean I wouldn't fight it.

"No," I whispered. The first word in so long....

"What?" she asked, moving her head so fast it appeared to be instantaneous. Her hands left mine to hold my face.

"No," I said again.

"When you start living again, I'll be waiting," she promised. "I won't go far...."

She stood and kissed me on my forehead before turning away.

"I'll die without you," I said quickly, desperate to keep her here.

She turned back around. "You're already dead," she whispered. "Not even I can bring you back."

"No!" I cried, throwing myself at her feet. "Don't leave me!" I cried.

Suddenly, she had me in her arms.

Then, just as suddenly, she was gone.

I killed myself that night. Harry followed me less than a week later. We were buried at the same time, and Jessie was there.

Eventually, Jessie moved on. She eventually found someone she could love and married her. Together, the two of them adopted children in need, like she had been, and helped them as I had helped her. She and her wife gave those children wings to fly, and they helped so many.... There would be nights when Jessie would stay up, away from her family, crying the late hours away. I would always be there for her on those nights, in ways that I couldn't have been while I was alive.

She never went back to what the Dursleys had made her. She never looked back on that part of her life. She never even told her wife about it.

Harry, Draco, and I were forever watching over her, and we welcomed her when she died, old and fragile, and warm in her bed.

~End~