Canadian Couplet

CANADIAN COUPLET

I. "Oh, Canada!"

"Close your eyes," he says.

I wonder just what kind of surprise he has in store for me. When I do, he takes me by the hand and we use a portkey. I have never ever tried to Apparate anywhere with my eyes closed, and I certainly have never had anyone lead me blindly anywhere without prior knowledge of where I was going. If I had ever doubted Harry before, I know for sure I trust him now.

When we finally arrive at our destination, Thankfully in one piece, he quickly places his hands over my eyes.

"Still closed?" he asks, and I nod my head as he leads me forward.

"Ready? Take a look!"

When I open my eyes i see a new house being built in the forest. It looks a little rustic, but is really quite lovely. It has a nice view of a lake and mountains all around.

"What is it, Harry?" I know it´s a house, of course, but I want to know just why we are here.

"It´s called a log cabin. I saw one of these when I was visiting a few of the American world cup players in Montana. I quite liked it." He smiles proudly at everything around us.

"Is that where we are?" I know we had used a portkey, but had we actually gone that far?

"No, Alicia," he says as his green eyes twinkle. "But we are quite close. We´re in Canada, actually. Alberta to be specific."

Canada! I am feeling quite the shock about this because Wonder Boy has outdone himself yet again.

"I decided to get this built. I am going to live here one day soon." He stands in his thinking pose as I look at everything again.

"It´s going to be quite nice when it´s done." It is simple and dignified, very much like the Harry I know.

He nods once. "I decided to emigrate. It´s not that hard for a British citizen to move to Canada, and it´s not that much different from home."

Now I really start to worry. "Won´t you miss your friends and your family? Won´t you miss... me?"

Harry leaves his thinking pose to look at me directly in the eyes. It is always both a pleasure and a pain to look into those emerald green eyes of his. They are so beautiful and unearthly.

"Alicia," he starts. He sounds so serious, I know this can´t be good. "I don´t plan on missing you at all."

I feel as if I fell off my broom right down to the turf of the Quidditch pitch. So he took me all the way into the wilds of Canada for this? Since when was Harry so cruel?

"Listen, I know I should have told you about this earlier..." he says as he reaches for my hand. I back away ready to curse Harry and curse Canada, but the blockhead continues, oblivious to the pain I´m feeling.

"I want some peace and quiet in my life. I am tired of being The-Boy-Who-Lived. I want to be Harry, and this seems just the place to do it."

Damn Canada! Damn log cabin! Damn peace and quiet!

"Anyway..." He actually looks embarrassed now. Good! "It´s a large cabin. I am having it built for two with room eventually for a family."

"Good for you" I say neutrally. Maybe he´ll find himself a nice, fat Canadian witch with wide hips who will give him plenty of fat Canadian children.

"Don´t you mean 'good for us´?" Harry looks back to me with confusion on his face. "I made this for you, too! I wanted to share it with you, share my life, share... children. Eventually. If you like that sort of thing."

While my brain is still trying to find more ways to curse Canada and all things Canadian, I stop abruptly. "What did you say?"

As he tries to take my hand, I actually let him this time. "I know I am asking you for a huge sacrifice, but I think we could be really happy. Together. Here."

I can see his look of uncertainty. It has an almost comical effect in conjunction with his wild hair. I wait to make Wonder Boy stew a little more.

"Well?" His brave smile is being held in place with Spell-O-Tape, but I torture him a moment longer with a pause. Finally even I can´t wait any more.

"Oh, Canada!" I throw my arms around him and drop kisses all over his face. I don´t think I have ever been so fond of a national anthem in my entire life.

II. Learning French

So here I am on a cold day doing what is best to do on a wet winter day like this. I am curled up in front of the fire with a hot cup of cocoa and a book. Harry succeeded in moving me to Canada, and I decided I was going to learn French. Yes, I know it´s not really used in the western provinces. I´m athletic, not stupid!

I thought it would be an easy thing to do to show how committed I am to being with Harry. Of course, after wracking my brain for hours with this Berlitz travel book, I feel exactly that--like I should be committed. I don´t know how I will ever learn this. In my frustration, I pretend the book is a quaffle and throw it across the room... right into Harry´s face. Uh-oh. This isn´t going to be pretty.

Harry bends to retrieve the offending book as if it were a normal every day occurrence to have books pelting his head. Well, sometimes it is, but I´ve been working on that.

"Berlitz European Phrase Book..." he enunciates as he sits beside me. "Are you having trouble with the French?"

Why yes, Captain Obvious, I guess I am.

"You don´t have to do this, you know." he says as he supportively squeezes my hand.

I pick at the comforter wrapped around me and say lamely, "But I said I would do it." I have never been a quitter, so this is irksome.

Harry smiles encouragingly. 'You just need to play to your strengths. Let´s make a game of it."

Now he has my attention.

"I will quiz you , and with every right answer you get, I will give you something French."

Lovely. It will probably be a baguette.

"My name is Alicia," he prompts.

"Je m´appelle Alicia."

"Bon!" His eyes glitter with approval and he leans in to give me two chaste kisses, one on each cheek.

"I come from Great Britain."

"Je viens de Grande-Bretagne."

Again he gives two quick kisses on the cheek.

"And next, 'I´m with my husband.´ That one is very important."

So far, so good. I know this one, too. "Je suis avec mon mari."

This time he kisses me once on the lips very quickly. He pulls back and winks while I remain the picture of calm.

"Now let´s try something more difficult." He thumbs through the book to find just the right phrase. "I´d like a room with a double bed."

As sexy as that idea sounds, Harry just passed all my French ability. I´ve been shot down before I could get to any really interesting kissing.

"I don´t know." I admit in defeat.

"Je voudrais une chambre avec un grand lit." He says it so automatically that I know something is afoot.

"And just how do you know French, Harry?" I cross my arms and wait for an explanation that had better be good.

He hedges and blushes. "Well, we did have those Beauxbatons students when I was in fourth year..."

"It was the Delacour sisters, wasn´t it?" I narrow my eyes in challenge.

"No!" he croaks like a squished toad.

"Do you have anything else to tell me?" Now I am drumming my fingers on my arm in menace.

"I love you? Je t´aime!" Harry really looks like he´s sweating now.

"Prove it. I want something very French." I beckon to him with my index finger.

He swallows nervously and then tentatively tries to give me a proper kiss. I keep on kissing him until the kiss stops being timid and really gets some passion into it. Now this kind of French I can do any time, any where.

After a few moments of that, I stop and whisper, "Harry?"

He looks like he´s in a daze and adjusts his glasses.

"Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?" I can´t say this properly without a huge flirty smile on my face and a twinkle in my eye.

"Alicia! How do you...?" he stammers.

"You can thank Patti LaBelle for that. So?"

So he does, and I do. We both do many times. At the end he whispers something French and unexpected.

"Merci, j´ai passé une merveilleusse soirée."

I hold him close and laugh in contentment. That expression of soul-deep satisfaction I would understand in any language.