2,421 - 2,440 of 3,594 Stories

Twinkle Toes: Ron, Hermione and Harry play a trick on Snape, who is blissfully unaware for a long, long while. Dumbass. Jelly: Ron hears a rumour about Draco...and uses it to his great advantage. Of course. Well, what else is he going to do with the information?

Not so much a fanfic as a look into the future. This is what happens to Harry at the end of book seven. Don't question it. Live it.

This was a challenge fic put forth by Laucia Siandel, I decided to take it up to see if I could actually make a sensible story out of the requirements listed below. ````* Harry unable to get his nail polish off (just for Circe). * Dumbledore's secret about him and (character of your choice). * An unusual paring . * The Giant Squid Speaks, and give someone some good advice. * What really happened that night in the prefects bathroom. * Someone dying in the most ironic way you can think of. * The line "Its not my fault, he framed me. He was going to cut all my dolls hair off!". * Fire Whiskey. * The return of Lockhart. * A character changing sides (But not Draco or Snape).

Harry enters his room, only to find that all of his socks have vanished! Who took his socks? Where are they? Will Harry ever get them back? A funny fic all about socks.

You want to read this story: A)It features a gorgeous but still snark-ily attractive Draco. B)Hermione is a librarian with issues. C) There is going to be mud wrestling. D) It's fairly entertaining and not too long. . .oh and er...um...chocolate to those who review...the good kind too....none of that fake stuff....

It's April Fool's Day, the Marauders are bored and they haven't teased Snape for days. So they find an empty classroom and gather their supplies...

Feeling a little confused about the identity of the Half-Blood Prince? Fear not, you aren't alone. Harry discovers that he, Voldemort, Ron, Hermione, and a few surprising guest others are confused about it as well.

Ron Weasley is a wizard from a very old wizarding family. But he also has to face problems every Muggle sometimes has to deal with. Unfortunately, his stay with his girlfriend Hermione Granger during the Easter holidays leaves him with unusual and unpleasant treatment. How does he handle the situation?

Poor Mary Sue! She came to Hogwarts looking for a bit of fun with a mysterious, brooding hero-type...but it looks like her hero's already in love!

Well, Ron and Harry decide to write Moldie Voldie an invitation to a slumber party. But when they actually get a reply, things get weird. This in only the first chapter.

Fred and George Weasley never thought that being hauled to Filch's office could be a good thing. Now wrong they were. one-shot

Harry gets zapped to the "real world." How does it go? What would you do if you had a second chance? What would you change?

The story of Hagrid's wand, as told by Hagrid's wand.

Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy as superheroes! Join in the guttery fun as they save the world from Lord MoldyShorts. An appearance from Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy! (Harry/Draco slash, AU, Parody)

When the Dark Lord has trouble recovering from his Obliviator Charms, Draco, Ginny, and their pink-haired offspring are asked to help him relocate to Japan. A squirrel wreaks havoc, a toaster complains loudly, and general madness ensues. Utterly silly D/G.

Young Draco and Lucius have completely silly and pointless arguments about hippos and dolls.

It has been decades since the last Ghost Revue, and since then, three more ghosts have joined the school's gang. Come meet them!

When a baby beluga falls out of the sky, it drastically changes Hogsmeade and the lives of Harry and Hermione. Nothing will ever be the same again.

Written in a moment of not only Harry's, but also the author's confirmed insanity. Busted bashing, stupid!Harry, and McGonagall snogging a whippersnapper with scary eyebrows. Harry sits on Snape's knee and is bottle-fed. Hilarious!

We've all seen the cane Lucius Malfoy carries around. Some might say it was a Pimp Cane. But what if that cane was an entity of its own? Someone trapped inside for the whole of eternity? What if the Pimp Cane was Bob?

A Gentlemen’s Agreement between Mr Draco Malfoy and Mr Ronald Weasley leads to a disrupted morning, a long-awaited Quidditch result and a very annoyed Harry. Set in an AU sixth year, where the twins, Angelina, Alicia and Katie haven’t left. Slash.

Harry comes down with an unusual condition during his fourth year of school, but nobody can figure out what it is. How long will Harry have Quidditch on the brain... and stomach?

Sirius Black tries to investigate in some matters. Sequel to "Take Two."

Percy has a new assignment from Mr. Crouch: increase the economic uses of Flobberworms! Percy searches for a way to promote Flobberworm usage, approval from his Dad, and become "one of the guys." He succeeds at all of these goals in a most creative way!

"He is resting in peace! He has fallen beyond the Veil and left us forever. He’s kicked the bucket, dead as a doornail, gone to doggie heaven, given up the ghost, he’s standing outside the Pearly Gates and making a pass at St. Peter as we speak! This wizard is absolutely, irrevocably, without a shadow of a doubt DECEASED!!!"

The trio's search for the horcruxes leads them somewhere unexpected...a little town in Southern California.

For Harry Potter's twenty-eighth birthday, he received three pairs of socks, two ties, and a summons to his bosses' office. What happened next could only be expected of Harry Potter.

Basically, I got really hyper and wrote a lot of insanity into a plotless trip. Oh well, enjoy! I'm not going to tell you what's inside.

The dark, evil Azkaban tower had no idea what it was in for when a quarreling couple tramped up to its doors, soon to be joined by a confused Severus Snape, still rattled and disgruntled from the HBP incident. And you'd never know that you could tell so much about someone just by looking at their socks.

It's what you've all been waiting for: the Harry Potter musical! Here's the script for "Yo Yo Yo, It's the Sorcerer's Stone," in which Hagrid has to pee, Dumby gets naked, and stupidity is just around the corner!

The Marauders were playing a game of truth-or-dare, and Sirius was dared to do something extremely embarrassing during breakfast. What is it, and how will the students and professors react?

Oliver and Fred discovered Snape's secret opium den! There is repeated bum-squeezing, getting high, disco, ominous warnings, and skinny-dipping! Another added plus... Virtually No Plot! Warning *Underage drug use and mild slash* YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! Or wait, was it They Were WARNED? Oh, I am so confused!

The Gryffindors are in for quite a day. Mysterious confessions, Chicken Grams, and passionate kisses are just a few of the crazy things that will give Harry and Ron a new meaning for the words ‘miserable Monday’, and that's just breakfast. R/Hr, G/Dean. A part of the 15 Things Challenge.

What would happen if James Joyce wrote Harry Potter? A silly little satire, clever, pithy and a little weird. A parody of the classic Finnigan's Wake.

“It figures that you two would run off into a girls store to buy make-up and make out. You silly poufs..." A short, fun fic about Moony and Padfoot shopping for make-up, making out, and catching Prongs in the act.

What happens, when Draco Malfoy realises his biggest enemy is the razor that is slowly shaving his leg..?

Have you ever wondered what would happen if Hermione and Draco had to serve detention together in the wee hours of the night? You can find out here as Hermione tells Ron about her... interesting... night.

Prof. Trelawney's Divination class tries out a new method of seeing the future. Many receive puzzling results, especially Neville, who doesn't know what to make of what he's found.... Funny, yet mysterious.

This wacky, rather odd story tells the tale of what might happen if Hogwarts was ever visited by a Wizard of Oz-type tornado. Starring Neville and Luna, this fic features a flying Greenhouse, Boating!CrossDressing!Snape and singing, dancing, candy-waving House Elves. What's not to love?

Ever hate a picture of yourself so much you wanted to destroy it? How Filch sees Mrs. Norris is not quite how Mrs. Norris sees herself. Filch really should have known better.

A completely random piece about Harry, pepperoni pizza and the future of the wizarding world. Read to find out more!

A Blind Round Robin written by Stufler, Larinzia Hope, Ginnysdarkside, AmanitaMuscaria1, Shahrazad, and others. Harry's day starts out bad, and goes out on a random tangent from there...

A short and crazy one shot containing seven ships, six of which are slashes... AD/Voldemort, HP/Voldemort, HP/DM, AD/MM, LM/Voldemort, AD/HP, and JP/Voldemort. Obviously, things get a bit weird....

Minerva, with Dumbledore's help, discovers a special magical prowess. BeST's response to the September/October 2007 FA/Quidditch Pitch challenge. UPDATE: Winner of the FA/QP challenge.

Ravenclaw prefect Lisa Turpin volunteers to tutor at the library for a day; it looks good on your record, after all. Seems easy, right? Wrong. Hilarity ensues when she encounters the very imbeciles that mke up the dregs of society!

Harry and the gang try in vain to figure out what year they are set in.

Behind every picture-perfect smile, there's bound to be a lie. There is no exception when it comes to the teenage portraits of the Four "Great" Founders that supposedly got along swimmingly until the end. Godric and Helga seem to be the perfect couple, while Salazar is in love with the hot-headed Rowena. Now, if only Rowena would see it that way...

Neville is a little wary about Luna's plans for attire at their wedding. (Alternate title: Proper Wedding Attire)

Harry and Draco decorate their house for Christmas. D/H fluff!

One shot! A behind-the-scene look at a fashion show to benefit St. Mungo's. Hosted by Madam Rosmerta!

It was only a quick game while they were waiting. But it didn't turn out quite the way the boys anticipated...

Errol meet Window. Window meet Errol. Revenge is at hand. One-shot.

It's Ron's first disastrous day working at Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes. If things weren't bad enough, a very peculiar customer shows up.... post-DH, pre-Epilogue.

Have you ever wondered about what it would be like after the Dark Lord is finally vanquished? Draco Malfoy takes a stroll down memory lane and finds something surprisingly disturbing at the end.

The diary of Severus Snape if he were ever to live with me for three months (in America, in the Muggle world, and invisible to the Muggle eye).

Auror Frank Longbottom makes a hash of young Severus Snape's life and career plans.

Take a delightful peak into a peculiar alternate universe where "magic" is synonomous with "occult"! WARNING: The following fic contains irony, Monty Python humor, camp, and maybe a spot of liquified brain matter. Don't worry about that. ^_^ (Satan and the Occult claim no ownership to Harry Potter.)

The night before Ron's first year, Fred and George take it upon themselves to warn him of the "dreaded dangers" within the Sorting ceremony....

"Granger, I understand the incessant need most people have for getting absolutely besotted with the holiday, but I don't quite think this is what is expected." DHr fluff!

Bernard Goldsmith is in for the shock of his life when he finds out that his wife is faaar from normal...abnormal noises, strange things in the storage room.

Two Muggle-borns get their letters and go to Hogwarts. I know it's been done before (MANY TIMES) but (hopefully) it's a bit different. You also find out who Hermione's friends were before she went to Hogwarts. She was Muggle-born afterall...

It hasn't been a very good year at all for the Malfoy family, but Narcissa is determined to put her best foot forward and keep up appearances in her annual Christmas letter. Warning: contains high quantities of self-delusion, and far more underlining than necessary.

Vernon has a surprise encounter. Dudley needs a job. Fred and George have a new business. General chaos ensues.

The year is 1980 and the date is December 25th. The Dark Lord will be defeated by a small child called Harry Potter in less than a year. Just a few weeks earlier, two Death Eaters have been killed by Aurors; everything seems to be going remotely well for the good part of the wizarding world. But in another corner of it three Death Eaters share a Christmas full of memories, too much wine, hope and humour. Meet Armand Avery, Corwin Nott and Severus Snape at their last Christmas as followers of Voldemort for fifteen years.

Harry isn’t hungry. Ron and Hermione are worried and Neville’s had better days, too. (Post-OotP.)

Follow Draco through his seventh year at Hogwarts, through his highs, lows and in particular, the burning of his eyebrow by a rogue Blast-ended Skrewt.

Harry hadn't anticipated having no choice but to go to Ron and Hermione for wedding night advice. The information he got wasn't quite what he expected.

The four Marauders decide to congratulate themselves for their OWL year by going to North America on vacation. From the quill of Moony, see in how much trouble four Brits can get!

Remus, Peter, Sirius, and James are bored and hot at Peter's house. They venture outside to find....

I never asked to be in Hufflepuff, you know.... So begins the anonymous Hufflepuff who has chosen to share with the world the thoughts and views of a Hufflepuff. No longer a "Huffleduffer." It is time the world learned what being a Hufflepuff really means....

Challenge fic. Draco's gone to a visit to the Burrow. Features Barbie dolls, Jack Daniel's Tennessee Whiskey, sparkly mascara and a little bit of Orlando Bloom.

Imagine a Hogwarts taken over by some musical lover. Is that all it takes for two people destined for each other to find their love? Friends try to convince the lovers to make their move through songs and choreographed choruses. Hogwarts is a mad house. How fun can this be?

Remus is very distraught. He just lost another one of his best friends and he can't get over it. But then, something happens. Something that helps get over his grievances and gives him quite a laugh.

Voldemort finds himself in a rather infuriating position. In order to kill Harry Potter, he has to save him first. That's right, he has to work for his kill, although he gets more than he bargained for.

What happens when Fred and George Weasley, accompained by an...unwilling member of staff, travel back in time 400 years? They happen to bump into a certain Edmund Blackadder...

When Sirius Black dumps a girl, she cries and begs him to come back. When he humiliates her in front of the whole school, she doesn't seek revenge. Never. Too bad that no one ever said that to Angela Peters. SBOC

What if the veil wasn’t actually death? What if it were a portal to Germany in the early 1800s? Extremely crazy Sirius/Beethoven slash inspired by Immortal Beloved.

A typical sarcastic Ravenclaw is left in the hospital wing after an... interesting... Quidditch tryout. If only she had someone to talk to.``As long as it wasn't him.

Jaessa Starsley: your average, goody-goody Hogwarts student, right? Wrong! See what kind of trouble she gets into while she falls in love and is tortured (in a friendly way) by Harry and Ginny Potter's daughter, Lily.

Hogwarts has its first official "science" fair, of sorts. Includes electricity, Ron doing tea leaf readings, Hermione with blue hair and Parvati's method to Divination, which doesn't really work.

Eight students from the University of Magic, Heineland, attend an exchange programme to Hogwarts! What will happen...? Revolutionary changes to the owl system? An economic boom? Let's just say... Simple mayhem. (If there's such a thing.) Join the laughter!

“You! What’re you doing here?”``Draco whipped around, coming face to face with a set of gorgeous blue eyes. Stepping back, he gasped in awe. Before him stood a man with long blond locks, blue eyes, tanned skin, dressed in a TEAL kilt and white pirate shirt! Wonder of wonders! “You’re almost as pretty as I am!”

Lord Voldemort's own slightly twisted take on the classic poem, "The Night Before Christmas." Also, a sequel to my other Christmas fic, "Tom Riddle's 12 Days of Christmas!"

OK...this is a random one-shot that has absolutely NOTHING to do with the Harry Potter series, except that they share names. Everyone is very OOC and VERY silly. Don't read if you're looking for a good, meaningful fic!

A heroic saga of forbidden love. The Romeo and Juliet of the modern age. It's Harry/Draco... in verse!

One formidable Longbottom grandmother and two mischievous Weasley twins teach Rita Skeeter a very public lesson... UK English, canon-ish, humour.

During Harry, Ron, and Hermione’s sixth year at Hogwarts, they spend a Christmas at the Burrow. Massive hysteria ensues at the Weasley house, including (but not limited to) fighting with Fairy Lights, an exceptionally grumpy Mrs. Weasley, Arthur in big trouble with his wife, a VERY lost muggle, and lots of shouting. Oh, and what’s that in Charlie’s room? (Sorry it’s so late, but think of it this way: What better way to get your mind off of school/work than by reading about the holidays?)

Whatever terrible fears Harry had about parallel universes paled in comparison to what he was about to fall into now!

“…old men are guilty if they forget what it was to be young…” (OotP, p. 728). Meet a young clever prankster and the-one-who-inspired-you-know-who as children: Albus Dumbledore and Adolph Grindelwald. Insight into their minds.

And the wildness continues! The much-anticipated sequel to Voldie's Tea Party and Harry Potter's Tea party has finally gotten here! Draco Malfoy catches the tea party fever from Harry, Ron, and Hermione, and begins to have them in his common room. So what happens when he is interrupted? Nothing good for the interruptor. Read to find out what the heck I'm talking about!

Fred and George decide to put their money where their mouth is, so to speak and branch off from the prankster business into Flobberworm Juice. Poised and ready to sell, they’re approached by the one person they’d never have expected to help. Can they trust ole’ Perc? And why does he want so badly to help them sell the new coughs slashy product coughs?

Finally, there is a solution to all of Hogwarts' relationship problems! That's right, a world-renowned speaker is coming to talk at the school! Now, if only Ron wasn't in love with Hermione who's in love with Harry who's in love with... are they any love lines that *aren't* crossed in this school?

We don't know about you, but we think Hagrid has promise. He needs a little work before you start shipping him off...

"Apologies. I don't do rhetorical questions. You'll have to check with Pettigrew on that one. Every question's a rhetorical one with him, if you take the strict definition of the word, because he can't answer any of them." James Potter and Sirius Black get up to some fun. Which means anything but for poor beleagued prefect Lily Evans. And who exactly is responsible for those knights on the fourth floor, who don't usually sport pink tutus and peg legs? One-shot.

It's time for History of Magic and the trio gets side-tracked by swapping notes. Harry's rather hyper, Hermione is killer with a quill and Ron is denying things.

Why doesn\\\'t Hogwarts have visits for the families of Muggle-born pupils, so that they can see what their child is getting into? Maybe they used to ... before Penelope Clearwater\\\'s parents came on such a visit.

A silly short story set during Half-Blood Prince. Harry knows that Malfoy is up to no good in the Room of Requirement, but are two Hufflepuff girls helping him in exchange for money? What's the deal with Hufflepuff anyhow? And is their flying monkey really evil? The two girls are definitely plotting something and, yet again, no one seems to believe Harry. He sets out to solve the mystery of the strange, silly Hufflepuff girls... alone, if he has to.

How did the greatest magic school in the world get its start? One of the Founders, Helga Hufflepuff, explains (in her own way) just how the school began....

Hogwarts has decided to host a day when the house-elves serve many different dishes from many different countries! Hermione's excited, Harry's hoping there'll be pizza, and Ron, well, Ron's really not sure...

Ron falls victim to an April Fools prank where he is transfigured into a rat. How does a rat survive a day in the hazard world of Hogwarts? How will he escape the clutches of a very randy Voldemort? Featuring clueless Ron, frustrated Hermione, indignant Draco, repenting Harry, disappointed Lucius, and two half-giants who are not afraid to experiment with the floo network! A sequel of sorts to A Day in the Life of a Ferret.